Being offended by being left on read after sex

A conversation has to end somewhere, it’s not a relationship. He has done lots of nice things you like but him not replying isn’t that big a deal surely.

Maybe he went to sleep…. Maybe it freaked him out a bit and he was worried you were developing feelings too much? If you value it, you could say that you were on a bit of a high after sex and feeling affectionate towards him in that moment but that doesn’t mean you want a relationship.
He probably just didn’t know what to say because he wasn’t feeling the same way.
it may not work if you want more of an emotional connection than he does.
id be the same - the two go hand in hand for me but it’s not the same for everyone

I’ve had similar happen to me recently and actually sent them a message in the end to say I wasn’t looking for any big romance but I do find it extremely rude to ignore someone you’ve had sex with, grow up. I then blocked them as it wasn’t someone I wanted to see again after that.
done convince yourself in any way that because you guys aren’t in a relationship that he has the right to be disrespectful.
as you’ve messaged now to cancel plans and let him know you’re pissed I wouldn’t message again.
sorry that’s happened OP, we can end up thinking all kinds of reasons why someone behaves like that after being intimate but essentially it’s down to them behaving like a child and not knowing how to communicate, even if he’d woken up and thought he’d regretted it because he’s not ready for example, he could still have messaged back to say his head has gone and he needs some space but that’s a him problem

You’ve both said you don’t want a relationship, just occasional sex and dates. But do you actually mean it? Because if I were him, and getting postcoital messages about the bed smelling of him and wanting a big cuddle, I’d see that as an indication the other person wanted more.

F*ing hell. What an over the top reaction on your part.
The caffeine hasn't kicked in yet but just sounds as if the text fizzled out.

I often leave my other half on read at night because I read his message and fall asleep. I suppose I should be glad he hasn’t dumped me for it…

Exactly, it’s a bit of an intense message for a non-relationship. I’d dial it down a bit OP (by which I don’t mean cancelling plans and feeling offended) if you don’t want to lose what sounds like a nice situation for both of you.

I don't get this big deal with 'left on read'. As a pp said, someone has to make the final message in an exchange and no-one owes you an instant reply, especially if you've now started to sound like you want more than you both agreed to. Maybe he's hoping that you'll take the hint instead of actually spelling out it was just a shag. I think you've overdone it with your response.

Some men are very used to playing 'nice' to get sex. It can confuse you because what he is doing and saying doesn't seem to match up.

He is being romantic, acting like he truly cares about you, so you think it will develop onto some sort of close feelings or relationship even if not official.

But he is just doing what he has always done, acting nice to get sex and then losing interest after he has got it.

Quite.
And this isn't even a relationship.

Yet another thread about a seemingly 'cool' fwb arrangement being endowed with expectations.

That's a bit irrelevant actually to be fair because surely even married people in this particular text exchange (good sex) would not have a hissy fit over the text fading out.

It's ridiculous.

your either want a relationship or you dont
you say you just want him for sex
keep a cool head

it is no big deal about the text though

Tbh, that message from you was quite intense for someone who says they don’t want a relationship, only occasional sex.

Either he thought fuck, this is becoming something more serious and he backed away, thought your message is a bit much and didn’t know how to respond, or fell asleep.

You sound like you want a relationship. I think that is how most people would interpret that text. Your subsequent upset and anger towards him also suggests you want a relationship.

He is probably just managing your expectations by backing off a bit.

You're coming on way too strong for a fwb arrangement. If you want this to continue then you need to dial it way back.

I think you are over reacting and you seem to want more than 'just sex' he is trying to put the boundaries down by not responding to your (being in a relationship) type text. Maybe he is not right for you.

This. To even post on MN about it is frankly bizarre

You both discussed not wanting a relationship.
You had sex.
You sent a text which would indicate a relationship.
This probably confused him, and he didn’t know how to respond.
He went to sleep.

I think the text contradicted the agreement.

So you dumped him because he didn’t continue some online chat, despite the fact you had a date lined up?

I don’t think you are ready to date or to have a new relationship. Work on getting through your divorce. Good luck.

He hasn’t ignored you, you were texting back and forth. One of you had to stop messaging at some point. And you’re coming on quite intense for someone who doesn’t want a relationship. A love heart emoji could have freaked him out. You’re being ridiculous, just calm down.

I agree that you Come across to him and here that you want a relationship

I read the title as being left on road after sex, and was going to suggest LTB.

He sent you a message, you responded. How long were you expecting this to and fro to go on for?

The bed smelling thing is strange. You’ve over-egged the pudding there. So you made plans to go out & cancelled them cos he didn’t reply? Seems a bit OTT to me.

😂

I was ready to say how awful if he hadn't responded but to me that's a goodnight message !