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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is the dog invited?

1000 replies

DoggyAuntie · 06/08/2026 21:02

My husband's brother and his wife are coming to stay with us this weekend, on their way back home from their holiday further north. All good. They live in a big house with a garden whereas we live in a smaller house with a back yard but we can cope for a couple of days.

This afternoon, I looked at my sister-in-law's Instagram. She has posted photos of herself and her husband on holiday - with her dog!

I have not invited the dog. The dog had not been mentioned. I do not want the dog in my house.

My husband has said it's just one of those things. I feel they are being insufferably rude to expect me to welcome the dog into my home without even asking.

Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
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5
mydogisthebest · 07/08/2026 19:45

Greedybilly · 07/08/2026 18:32

@mydogisthebest- I'm obviously making sweeping generalisations about dig owners. There are good and bad obviously. In my experience people that see their dog as a human are not great dog owners.
Like I said I'm not a 'dog hater ' - I just don't like being around them. Childish to find that 'hateful'. I don't like moths either but I don't 'hate ' them.

I don't see my dog as human although I do think he is much nicer (and quite often more intelligent) than an awful lot of humans.

LumpkinPumpkin · 07/08/2026 19:46

My parents are like this. We have cats. The cats are not fond of the dog (he’d be fine with them tbf but they aren’t fans). And yet the bloody dog comes every time they come over. He’s used to being with my dad 24/7 so he’s impossible to be left at all. I put up with it because I love them and they provide free childcare and you can’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

I genuinely don’t think the dog being inconvenient for other people ever occurs to them. I think that‘s very much the difference between dog people and non-dog people.

BrightLeader · 07/08/2026 19:47

I'm afraid most dog owners believe everyone likes dogs. Personally I don't particularly & don't want them in my house although when my sister in law was alive & stayed here sometimes we did tolerate them.

YoQuieroVino · 07/08/2026 19:47

mydogisthebest · 07/08/2026 19:45

I don't see my dog as human although I do think he is much nicer (and quite often more intelligent) than an awful lot of humans.

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My dog is completely dim and can be a bit of a dick 😂

SemiRetiredLoveGoddeess · 07/08/2026 19:49

They are obviously, take it for granted, the world revolves them.people.

And your husband a just one of those things, swerver men.

Tell your husband that you don't want the dog in your house. And he that he needs to tell them straightaway. It's their problem.

Tryagain26 · 07/08/2026 19:52

SatansScrotum · 06/08/2026 21:08

I wouldn't have the dog but I'd have made at clear at the time that the dog wasnf invited, not a few days before.

I'd have assumed that they had made other arrangements for the dog. It would never have occured to me that they would just bring it assuming it was also welcome.

Rpop · 07/08/2026 19:59

Longtimelurker1980 · 07/08/2026 19:40

I do, two very beloved and treasured children who I love more than life itself but I tell them all the time I don’t love them as much as my doggy. They love him more than me too. Pretty confident my husband loves him more than all of us, which I absolutely accept - none of us humans will lick his feet after a long walk or greet him enthusiastically at some ungodly hour of the morning.

He is infinitely more loveable than any of us.

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I hope this is just sentimentality and not actually the case.

Moonlightdancing · 07/08/2026 19:59

OP, love this thread and your answers 😄. Mind you, you are not rude in my eyes and I agree with you. I wouldn't imagine being happy in this situation either. I also am quite taken aback about all this expectation that we should all be aware that dog owners are inseparable from their pets. I thought people go on holiday without dogs, or at least ask if its acceptable to bring them over 🤔
I would not really enjoy a dog all over my place.

Moonlightdancing · 07/08/2026 20:01

Rpop · 07/08/2026 19:59

I hope this is just sentimentality and not actually the case.

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I know...right? Imagine being told as a child that actually your parents love the dog more than you.

Abracadabra12345 · 07/08/2026 20:04

Ecstaticallyastounding · 07/08/2026 17:50

OP I've just read all your posts and wanted to say I love you. I think you are my spirit animal. cough

And mine! Spiky and witty

EmmaM84 · 07/08/2026 20:05

Following with interest and I love that so many posters are taking your responses as rude when I regard them as deliciously dry humour. Im of the 66%, rocking up to stay with someone with a dog with zero communication beforehand, is the highest form of cheekyfuckery. Please update, I want details. Will it pee on your rug? With it eat your houseplant? Dry hump a teddy? Will the England womens rugby team also show up? Time will tell...

HiccupHorrendousHaddock · 07/08/2026 20:07

DoggyAuntie · 07/08/2026 19:41

Ouch, you got me good!

When I said 66% of the replies agreed with me in the binary choice poll, I didn't imagine that anyone would work out that it meant 34% disagreed.

Oops! 😬

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Your caustic humour has been a real tonic, especially when set against "I wuv my puppy more than my actual children" types.

HiccupHorrendousHaddock · 07/08/2026 20:10

my MN says it’s 2,518 votes, 66% agree with you but (oops) you forgot to mention that 34% disagrees with you.

Well done, @HereWeGo1234 - you have pointed out those that agree with the OP outnumber the Furbaby category by 2:1. A resounding victory for the OP, I'm sure you agree.

Shatenoeuf · 07/08/2026 20:13

Id probably send a message like

"Oh godI hope there hasn't been confusion, I'm allergic/phobic of dogs & cant have yours in my house, really sorry about that but i cant afforf to get carpets & sofas deep cleaned. I manage with medication when we visit yours but can't allow the dog in my home. Can we help you find a local kennel/dog sitter?"

LouiseK93 · 07/08/2026 20:21

Its not just one of those things. If they are brazen enough to being the dog without mentioning they will definitely be the type to pat the sofa next so the dog jumps up next to them, will sleep in the bed and leave its shit in the garden for you to pick up.
You wouldnt bring a partner or a kid to stay at someone's house uninvited would you? But for some reason alot of dog owners have so much entitlement.

ClaredeBear · 07/08/2026 20:24

Dog lover here. YANBU.

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmmmmmmmm · 07/08/2026 20:25

This is 100% my favourite thread all week. And DoggyyAuntie is my star of the month. Superbly played.👊👊👊

maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:32

BakedPotatoBeansCheeseColeslaw · 07/08/2026 17:22

A dog is not capable of loving you. It identifies you as its source of food

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Tell that to James Herriot, the vet who wrote All Creatures Great and Small.

Original poster
DoggyAuntie · 07/08/2026 20:34

maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:32

Tell that to James Herriot, the vet who wrote All Creatures Great and Small.

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Good luck with that...

OP posts:
maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:37

DoggyAuntie · 07/08/2026 20:34

Good luck with that...

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Perhaps she can just his nonfiction book series on being a vet in Yorkshire. He was certain animals love and indeed, have souls. He would know.

Therewegothen · 07/08/2026 20:40

DoggyAuntie · 06/08/2026 21:10

Should I have made it clear at the time that my mother in law and the England Women's Rugby team weren't invited too?

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Well they don't live in brother in laws home. I think it depends, they're visiting you on the way back from holiday - do they usually take the dog on holiday? If so,.they may have forgotten they'll have it with them or assumed your husband knew they'd have it with them. Clarification at the time of invite prevents these sorts of issues.

GoldenGail · 07/08/2026 20:41

Well many people disagree. I don’t have pets. My dogs are companion animals and very much part of my family . I think the dog would be very lucky to not have to visit you

Rpop · 07/08/2026 20:41

maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:37

Perhaps she can just his nonfiction book series on being a vet in Yorkshire. He was certain animals love and indeed, have souls. He would know.

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Though I think he would have needed a functional MRI scan and neurological background to be a bit clearer on the issue.

BakedPotatoBeansCheeseColeslaw · 07/08/2026 20:42

maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:37

Perhaps she can just his nonfiction book series on being a vet in Yorkshire. He was certain animals love and indeed, have souls. He would know.

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Person who loves animals writes book about how loveable animals are

maxslice · 07/08/2026 20:46

Rpop · 07/08/2026 20:41

Though I think he would have needed a functional MRI scan and neurological background to be a bit clearer on the issue.

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Where did you go to vet school?

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