AIBU to not let my 17 year old daughter go to the cinema at this time?

At 18 she could be out all night clubbing. Time to start having conversations about how to stay safe on nights out.

she is 17, how will you stop her?

i wouldn’t worry about her safety. She’s 17 not 7!!! Let
go a bit

but wouldn’t be keen to get out of bed at midnight

OP many kids do GCSEs, and then go inter-railing or to Reading or Leeds festival. A cinema with a lift is virtually no-risk in my book.

Time changes so much. I am not even that old but at 15 I'd get home from school, glad rags on, cinema with boyfriend, pub, club, lord knows where else and then taxi home.
I understand why you're uneasy, but she's almost an adult. You need to let her grow up. Can she book herself a taxi?

She'll probably be out till 4am under the influence this time next year. I'd let her go, help you both prepare for when she is 18.

My dsis has 2 dd's who are now in their late 20s. Obviously when they were both at Uni she had no idea what time there were out til...but when they came home in the holidays she would still worry/not be able to sleep until she could hear them arrive safely home....but that's because she knew they were out.
But yes, if op is going to pick up OP straight from the cinema she doesn't need to stress about it..

I was getting the bus into the city to meet my friends & go to the cinema in the evening when I was 13, never mind 17. When I was 17 I was working in pubs & going to nightclubs. (Nobody was checking ID in the 80s). If my mum had tried to stop me, I would have laughed at her.

I understand that times have changed & young people are treated as children for longer these days but OP is being completely ridiculous. This young woman will legally be an adult in a few months time. Of course she should be able to go to the cinema with her friends.

Yeah I don't get it.
She's going to the cinema at a reasonable time.
She will watch the movie with her friend.
She will walk out of the cinema and get into your waiting car.
🙄

Where on earth did you get that from?

If this particular 17 yo has additional needs then that is very relevant information and OP should have included it. The fact they didn't indicates this is a typical 17 yo.

As a medically complex 17 yo with (at the time, undiagnosed) ND, I started Uni at 17, lived in student accommodation and was regularly out until the sun came up.

at 17, i went abroad twice, festivals, clubbing, stayed in London for a week

you people (millennial parents) are nuts

Some of the comments on here are awful, this poor lady is just worried about her daughter, is she not allowed to do that? Comments like “do you take her to the toilet as well” is out of order.

Lol, have an Olympic medal for that whataboutery 🥇

Or do you think the OP's memory is so bad she forgot her DD has additional needs?

Sorry you are getting so much grief, just to add I would be the same as you, it’s only natural to worry about our offspring.

I’m shocked that you think you even have to ask. Of course it’s completely reasonable for a 17 year old to be out at night.

More important is that she will possibly be going to University very soon and has to learn how to stay safe be aware of possible dangerous situations and how to extract yourself from them.

Did you never go out to midnight when you were 17??

Not sure why the OP is getting heat for worrying about her daughter.

Somebody has even started another thread of her own in despair at parents like OP and how on earth do young adults cope etc etc etc (hopefully they will get the self esteem boost they are seeking with all the congratulatory on being so brilliant posts they will receive 👍)

Its hard being a young adult finding your way in the world and it’s even harder being a parent to a young adult finding their way in the world.

OP - she will honestly be fine . I think it’s opening night so all shows will be packed and the cinema will be crawling with nerds superman fans . 😁

Totally YABU

Its a 12A rated movie. That means there will be much younger kids there at the 8.45 screening.

You are setting yourself for a very difficult time when she turns 18. If you cant respect her to go to the cinema at this age shes just going to rebel.

Be there at 11.50 to collect her and tell her to ring you from inside when the show is over.

Sorry but you're being ridiculous! She could be married with kids of her own...

Kindly op, my 16 year old post GCSE-er is currently away on her first holiday with no adults, just her friends. The idea that you are trying to police a trip to Spider-Man for a 17 year old is hugely infantilising. She is almost an adult - you need to encourage her to use her burgeoning wings, not clip them.

And many a 17 year old in Scotland heading to uni this September would already have been on their sixth year holiday to Magaluf/Zante/Ayia Napa by now.

Granted that was the longest ten days of my life, when it was my DC.

Is 17 a typo and she’s actually 7?

If she’s 17, you are being utterly ridiculous.

my 17-year-old niece has just been interrailing round Europe with friends!

Im assuming there’s some additional needs or back story here? If not then you really need to chill out!

But… you’re picking her up after the cinema so where is the concern?

Of course it's normal for a parent to 'worry' or not relax until they hear their child is home, regardless of age. That's very different to what is being asked by OP. As you said, OP has no reason to stress in these circumstances. Her child is not out on the town, she's at the cinema. She'll be there to pick her up when it's finished. Totally different to a parent laying awake until they hear that key turn in the door.