When to introduce a dummy

Dummies can be a divisive topic in the world of parenting. On the one hand, they can soothe, satisfy a baby’s sucking instinct, and, according to many parents in our Mumsnet community, help to achieve longer bouts of sleep. According to the NHS, they may even offer increased protection from SIDS - although more evidence is needed.

Also called soothers, some parents fear dummies create dependency and lead to bad habits that are challenging to break. There are also fears it could create confusion when breastfeeding, and previous research has suggested that prolonged use can lead to delays with a child’s speech. 

Like with many parenting decisions, you have to do what feels right for you and your baby. And if you’re considering a dummy, it’s important to understand how to introduce it safely and when it’s time to phase it out.

When can you start giving a dummy?

According to the NHS, the recommended age to introduce a dummy if you’re breastfeeding is around four weeks, when feeding has been properly established. 

If you’re bottle feeding, you can introduce the dummy from birth.

What are the benefits of introducing a dummy?

Babies are born with a natural rooting and sucking instinct, even when they're not feeding. This is known as non-nutritive sucking and is a simple way to self-regulate the nervous system.

They’re also little learning machines, and figuring out how to self-soothe is a big part of their development. They give babies a way to calm themselves down and relax when they're feeling overstimulated.

Since sucking is something they naturally love to do from birth, a dummy can be just what they need to find that sense of calm. Choosing the right one, like a MAM soother, can help you feel good knowing they're self-regulating in a way that's both comforting and safe.

Many Mumsnet users have hailed the soothing power of dummies, with some suggesting it improved their baby's sleep quality.

The NCT has said that some studies suggest a link between soother use and a reduced risk of SIDS, although experts do not specifically recommend dummies for this benefit and the NHS insist that the research is not robust.

The link between soother use and a reduced risk of SIDS could be down to many factors, including:

• Dummies can help stop babies rolling onto their front

• Dummies may cause a baby to bring their tongue forward, reducing the risk of it falling to the back of the throat

• A dummy may cause a soothed baby to remain more still, avoiding blankets or pillows accidentally falling onto their face and interfering with breathing

Soothing with a dummy is also better for your baby than a thumb or finger, as it can be thoroughly sterilised and is less likely to interfere with oral development.

Check out our Mumsnet our pros and cons of dummies page for a more detailed explanation.

What are the signs a baby is ready for a dummy?

As a dummy can be used from four weeks with a breastfed baby and from birth with a bottle fed baby, it really is your choice. 

Not all babies take to dummies and many continue to spit out. In this case, it’s important to not force it on them.

What’s the best way to safely introduce a dummy?

Firstly, ensure the dummy is sterilised and clean before each use. You can sterilise soothers by one of the following methods: steam sterilising (electric or microwave) or immersing in a liquid sterilising solution. Make sure you follow the manufacturer’s instructions. Alternatively, you can sterilise a dummy by boiling it in water for a minimum of 10 minutes. 

MAM soothers make it simple as they are sold in special boxes that can be sterilised in the microwave. Simply fill the box with water up to the clear line and microwave for the time suggested.

Related: Expressing and pumping breast milk, your questions answered

Safety and care advice for dummies 

Before the first use of a dummy, place the soother in boiling water for five minutes then allow it to cool. Squeeze out any trapped water that might have entered the teat. This is to ensure hygiene, but do not use aggressive cleaning agents. 

Never dip the teat in sweet substances or medication as this can cause tooth decay. 

Replace the soother every one to two months of use, for safety and hygiene reasons. Or at first signs of damage or weakness to any part of the soother.

Make sure you have the right size for your baby. Soothers are typically sold by age, with the youngest being smaller and softer while the older sizes are bigger and often designed to survive whatever chaos they need to endure.

In the event that the soother becomes lodged in the mouth, do not panic; it cannot be swallowed and is designed to cope with such an event. Remove from the mouth with care, as gently as possible. 

MAM recommends giving up soother usage at three years of age. 

And for night soothers: Keep the soother in daylight - not direct sunlight - during the day so that the button glows in the dark. The glow button will not charge under LED light.

Always ensure the materials are baby-safe. MAM soothers meet the highest expectations and safety standards of the FDA and EN 1400 and are free from BPA, BPS, PVC, Phthalate, and Lead.

Try offering the dummy post feed when they’re settled. Some of our Mumsnetters advise tapping lightly on the dummy to encourage sucking, while others suggest tickling the cheeks. It’s also important to try a few different styles to see whether they prefer a certain teat. If a baby is bottle fed, they may prefer a soother from the same brand.

InTheRainOnATrain

MAM soothers are a popular choice with our Mumsnetters as they are designed to feel like a mother’s skin, and the extra-large air holes ensure your baby’s sensitive skin has room to breathe.

Can using a dummy interfere with breastfeeding?

If you're breastfeeding and plan to use a dummy, experts advise waiting until breastfeeding is well established first. The Lullaby Trust advises that once breastfeeding is established, introducing a dummy shouldn't impact it.

MAM’s range of soothers are made with MAM’s unique Soft Skin silicone, making them easy to introduce.

Related: A guide to breastfeeding - everything you need to get you started

When should you avoid or stop dummy use?

The NHS recommends weaning your baby off the dummy by 12 months, but many modern soothers—like MAM’s—are designed with dentists to support healthy jaw development. Plus, MAM has soothers that are specially made for little ones aged 16 months and up, so your little one can continue to soothe safely as they grow.

Like with many comforts, weaning may lead to protest and some tantrums. But if you’re determined, here are some helpful tips that could help.

Phase it out

Mumsnet user Lazypuppy recommends only giving the soother at nap or bedtimes and then trying to slowly replace it with another soother, such as a soft teddy. Remember to consider your baby’s age with things like cuddly toys and blankets and ensure they don’t pose a risk of SIDS.

Pick a date and go cold turkey

Many Mumsnetters say this is often the quickest way to get your baby to adapt. 

If they’re old enough to understand, you could pick a date and say you’re counting down until you have to give the soother to the soother fairy. If you have a friend or family member who is expecting or has a newborn, you could explain that you need to pass the soother on.

Mumsnet users swear by MAM dummies for helping soothe their LOs

Praise them for not using it

If your child has a successful sleep without the soother, give them lots of praise to help boost their confidence.

Use Santa or the Easter Bunny to help

If a holiday like Christmas or Easter is just around the corner, explain to them that leaving their dummy out means they’ll get a new toy in return. It doesn’t have to be anything big or expensive. 

Don’t go back to old habits

If you’ve weaned them off the dummy, don’t be tempted to offer it during a bad night or a tantrum. If your little one has successfully slept without it, they’re capable of doing so again.

What product features should you consider when choosing a dummy?

When choosing a dummy for your baby, there are a few things that are worth considering. Ask yourself: 

Does it support a healthy jaw and teeth development?

A criticism of dummies in the past was the fear that it put pressure on the jaw, changed the shape of the mouth or pushed the teeth forward. MAM soothers have a flexible teat that allows the baby to close their mouths in a natural way, and avoids a risk of teeth misalignments. 

Related: Latching on tips for breastfeeding

Is it crafted from safe materials?

A baby’s skin is sensitive, so you need to ensure a soother is made from materials that are going to be gentle. Look for ones that are free from BPA and BPS materials. MAM soothers are made from baby-safe materials and the mouth shields are designed with ventilation to let the skin breathe.

Are they simple to use?

Being a parent is challenging enough, so make sure you find a soother that works for you and your baby. Ones that are easy to clean are a big bonus. 

MAM soothers are sold in their own sterilising case, which is ideal for when you’re away from home too. Many soothers glow in the dark too, which makes them easy to find at bedtime. And the shield should be easy for your baby to grasp if it falls out.

Are dummies easy to clean?

Most dummies can be sterilised in a pot of boiling water or with a sterilising solution and water. Always read the instructions with a sterilising solution, as leaving a product in too long can distort the materials. MAM soothers come in their own sterilising box, so you just need to add water and microwave.

What do Mumsnetters think of MAM soothers?

With an innovative range designed with dentists and orthodontists, it’s no surprise that MAM soothers are highly rated by our Mumsnet community.

“MAM dummies, hands down.” ohcantbeliveit

“Definitely try MAM - they were the only ones my two would use.” anonymous311113

“Tried my second on MAM newborn soothers the day after he was born, and he loves them. Both breastfed - and it is much much more manageable to have a baby you can soothe with something besides your boob!” kc92

About MAM

We’re MAM and we love babies. We believe that only the best is good enough for them! That’s why for over 45 years we’ve been developing extra-safe baby products that combine attractive, innovative design with proven medical benefits. So, parents can feel confident, and babies feel good.

About the author

Kat Romero is a writer and journalist with over a decade’s experience in the industry. Hailing from London, she has become experienced in scouring the market to find the latest and best products, services and events that are worth your purchase. As a mother herself, she knows all too well how hard it can be to find the right soother for your DC. So, you can trust that she’s fully invested in making sure you receive the best recommendations.

Away from her desk, Kat can be found consuming far too much coffee and spending her weekends with her toddler and partner - soaking up the sights of London and sampling anything new and exciting that has opened up within walking distance.

Read next: the pros and cons of dummies