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Simulated pregnancy and induced lactation

(353 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

GingerAndTheBiscuits Wed 30-Sep-20 13:32:54

Should possibly come with all sorts of trigger/content warnings.

DH just sent me this:

TW simulating pregnancy and birth (in a house where their STBEx-wife and children live), already “planning” that the baby will be stillborn, and then wondering aloud if someone will lend them a baby to breastfeed.

All in a group for mothers taking medication so they can produce milk for their babies. Given how poor breastfeeding support is for many mothers in all parts of the world I can’t work out whether I’m more offended, disgusted, or terrified that this person has centred themselves and has people cheering them on.

DH questioned why women were commenting in support - I said it was part of the socialisation to “be nice”. His response was that it’s not being nice, it’s dangerous. And he’s right, but why can so many women not see it? Does it go beyond socialisation? According to other posts in the thread women were removed from the group for saying the person’s post was offensive/triggering to those who had experienced the loss of a child.

I don’t even know why I’m posting it really, other than I was so agog and this is one of the few places open to comment on things since I abandoned twitter

OP’s posts: |
CuriousaboutSamphire Wed 30-Sep-20 13:36:38

A warrior task, indeed!

I really can't fathom it! And they say it isn't a psychological condition!

ErrolTheDragon Wed 30-Sep-20 13:44:12

confusedwtf part of their anatomy is this individual artificially contracting? IME there is nothing vaguely like uterine contractions. A male can no more simulate and experience that than a female can for testicular pain.

Is this like an extreme form of method acting or something?

twoglassesofprosecco Wed 30-Sep-20 13:47:02

They might stop faking labour after 5 hours depending on how they tolerate the pain?? Yeah, that's realistic.

So lucky we can all just shut it off and give ourselves a pat on the back after just a few hours.

My labours were 28 and 37 hours, both ending in brutal and life threatening medical intervention. Too bad I couldn't just stop when it became too tough!

Who TF is pandering to this bonkers childbirth appropriation idea.

CuriousaboutSamphire Wed 30-Sep-20 13:49:35

They might stop faking labour after 5 hours depending on how they tolerate the pain?? Yeah, that's realistic. They might become Not Pregnant, if they can't work out how to get it all done and dusted, emotions experienced, publicly explored and packed away, before their work holiday runs out!

HDDD Wed 30-Sep-20 13:50:04

Those people 'being kind' to this person are enabling his illness

WeeBisom Wed 30-Sep-20 13:50:17

A woman who had a stillbirth was removed from the group for saying that this was outrageously offensive. I know that women are socialised to be nice and helpful but do they seriously not see how messed up this is?

viques Wed 30-Sep-20 13:51:23

blimey. I wonder if Aunt Lydia and the Handmaids are on their way in the birthmobile.

Breathe breathe breathe

Push push push

Breathe breathe breathe

Push push push.

I do think if these men are going to play at birthing they ought at least have the grace to go through a few years of menstruation first, say twelve years minimum.. I suppose it could be tricky to simulate but maybe taking very high dose laxatives combined with eating very spicey food for a week every month might be a start. No nipping into women's toilets to use the facilities though guys, deal with your bodily needs in your own grim little cubicles.

HecatesHat Wed 30-Sep-20 13:52:11

Poor 'soon to be ex-'wife & kids 😞

Thelnebriati Wed 30-Sep-20 13:52:12

This person wants to donate breast milk, and has a blog.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Wed 30-Sep-20 13:52:21

Why? Just why? Is it some kind of sexual fetish? Please tell me they won't actually be able to donate their "milk"?!

GingerAndTheBiscuits Wed 30-Sep-20 13:52:40

Maybe an episiotomy could be thrown in, for a more authentic experience?

OP’s posts: |
SunsetBeetch Wed 30-Sep-20 13:53:16


Kit19 Wed 30-Sep-20 13:54:53

What fresh hell is this?????

SisyphusAndTheRockOfUntidiness Wed 30-Sep-20 13:56:27

If this person actually had to go through the real pain of labour, & its aftermath, including potentially birth injuries that we're expected just to get on with, I suspect the interest in these procedures by TW would rapidly wane.

I imagine many women would happily forego the pain of labour if they could. Sitting & wailing as if you're in pain, when you're not, is very reminiscent of the wives on The Handmaid's Tale. Except of course they were trapped in a gilded cage too.

GingerAndTheBiscuits Wed 30-Sep-20 13:56:52


Those people 'being kind' to this person are enabling his illness

But why do so many do it? Is it fear of the woke-brigade? Because surely the majority can see this is a deeply troubling (and downright offensive) thing to do?

OP’s posts: |
CodenameVillanelle Wed 30-Sep-20 13:58:35



he said that the 7 year old offspring took that beach picture angry

TinselAngel Wed 30-Sep-20 13:58:42

I think this sort of pregnancy fetish is probably not as uncommon as we would hope.

See this story from Trans Widows Voices

CuriousaboutSamphire Wed 30-Sep-20 13:58:48

I have a theory... it's like getting a daily verdose of those weekly magazines "Mum ran away with my husband on our wedding night", that kind of thing.

Grim curiosity... 21st Century rubberneckers!

ErrolTheDragon Wed 30-Sep-20 13:59:41

Have they worked out how to squash their bladder to roughly the size of an eggcup so they have to pee frequently (including at night). Have they simulated heartburn (especially at night)?

As to how long they can endure their 'simulated birth' ... well, my DH was curious about the tens machine I used ... it was still at the high setting at which I started to find it irritating. A couple of seconds before he yelped with pain and tore it off again.grin I guess this person will have a bit more commitment than that at least.

SunsetBeetch Wed 30-Sep-20 14:00:19

he said that the 7 year old offspring took that beach picture angry

Oh whaaaat?! angry

WeeBisom Wed 30-Sep-20 14:00:42

I just feel so sorry for all the women in his workplace who have to go along with this crap. Also sorry for his 'uncooperative future ex wife' and kids who he is throwing out of the house while he simulates childbirth.

SisyphusAndTheRockOfUntidiness Wed 30-Sep-20 14:01:15

I find it quite upsetting that part of validating their identity, apparently has to include imagining the death of a child. Will they mourn it, I wonder? Narcissism to the extreme.

ErrolTheDragon Wed 30-Sep-20 14:02:57

I do hope his STBX has some support. Im guessing it's even harder for transwidows in California than here.

greenteafiend Wed 30-Sep-20 14:03:06

At the risk of sounding like a complete cat, why do these people always have such terrible makeup and poorly thought out hair accessories?

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