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Trans unpeak.

(354 Posts)
Regularhuey Fri 20-Apr-18 20:42:30

After reaching peak trans I have followed a few well known Radical Feminist groups on SM to learn more.

Sadly I have come across actual genuine transphobia in GC groups which I thought was just propaganda put out by TRAs.

Because I only ever hung around in naice intellectual spaces such as here, I thought they would all be a bit like MN feminist chat.

One summary of a conversation went along the lines of

Group post
"There's a Transwoman fitting bras at a London branch of M&S" Shock face.

Replies include "oh no (angry face) I'm never taking my daughter there"

"Men can work as a bra fitter. We should be able to ask staff for a female fitter if we want one"

Cue loads of hypothetical scenarios that we don't know will ever happen and predictable posts about AGP and boycotting M&S.

Anyway this is just one example of many I've come across recently.

I just suppose, as GC feminists perhaps we should be doing more to call out transphobia when we do see it because it seems lots of people are using GC feminism to express their hostility to Transpeople.

Greymisty Fri 20-Apr-18 20:45:26

Sounds like a fake discussion but ok.

Marchate Fri 20-Apr-18 20:49:04

I agree with Greymisty

RedHoodGirl Fri 20-Apr-18 20:49:36

I think the discussion you’re talking about was one on Mumsnet here:

Theshittyendofthestick Fri 20-Apr-18 20:50:11


Cynara Fri 20-Apr-18 20:50:15

I'm with pp all the way here.

finnmcool Fri 20-Apr-18 20:50:45

The issue I have with male bra fitters is this. Not everybody is confident enough to say " no thank you, I would like a woman to help me please"
That's not transphobic, that's being aware of female socialisation and not wanting to be 'rude'

CherryChasingDotMuncher Fri 20-Apr-18 20:51:10

Men should not be fucking fitting bras hmm

granmama75 Fri 20-Apr-18 20:51:11

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

WillowWept Fri 20-Apr-18 20:52:26

I don't understand how that's transphobic.

If you ask for a female bra fitter you will be told that the trans woman is a woman and that you're a bigot if you don't want him to fit your bra

ShowOfHands Fri 20-Apr-18 20:53:54

I saw your comments on there. Plus some muddled comments about gay male or lesbian bra fitters iirc (not from you).

I've only recently followed that page so am still finding my feet.

AngryAttackKittens Fri 20-Apr-18 20:54:16

Why would a man want to work as a bra fitter, and why would a woman want to have herself fitted for a bra by a man?

ShowOfHands Fri 20-Apr-18 20:55:04

I'd link it but does the op want to protect her rl name?

SusanBunch Fri 20-Apr-18 20:57:21

Which site is this?
There is a thread on here exactly along the lines of what you are describing, so why pretend you haven't seen it? There have also been numerous others (again on here), including the thread that started the whole discussion of the bra fitter.
I suspect you are being disingenuous here.

Badweekjustgotworse Fri 20-Apr-18 20:57:47

Ffs, why the hell would any bloke want to be a bra fitter? And hell no, if i went into m and s and found either a male or a TIM fitting bras I’d turn on my heel and walk out.

Beyond11cisRetinol Fri 20-Apr-18 20:59:32

Cool story bro 👍

Greymisty Fri 20-Apr-18 20:59:34

This topic is pointless....

M&S bra fitting done by either female or male is shite - back normally to large and cup to small.

AngryAttackKittens Fri 20-Apr-18 21:00:34

Finally, something we can all agree on! Seriously, pretty much any store dedicated to lingerie will do a better fitting, as will some department stores.

CircleSquareCircleSquare Fri 20-Apr-18 21:00:52

So someone said something you disagreed with and now you have to give up a way of thinking? Ok then.

A woman in my knitting group thinks bamboo yarn is too slippy, I don’t. I’ll probably give up knitting.

Have you heard of critical thinking?

Beyond11cisRetinol Fri 20-Apr-18 21:01:12

All anyone needs is a tape measure and mn anyway grin

Teacuphiccup Fri 20-Apr-18 21:01:38

I think transphobia definitely exists and we should say when we think something crosses a line but that doesn’t mean we should stop having discussions or any criticism of the GRA is transphobic.
Throwing accusations of transphobia around only serve to lessen the power of the word and thus allow genuine transphobia slip through the net.

FourFriedChickensDryWhiteToast Fri 20-Apr-18 21:03:03

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TeamOrders Fri 20-Apr-18 21:03:26

How could a male not realise that most women would not want him as a bra fitter? Why would he choose to do that unless to encroach on women's boundaries? The very fact that that person has chosen to become a bra fitter tells me to keep myself and my daughter as far away as possible. Just NO. I don't give the smallest fuck who thinks that's transphobic.

FourFriedChickensDryWhiteToast Fri 20-Apr-18 21:04:05

" Why would he choose to do that unless to encroach on women's boundaries? "

well exactly

SusanBunch Fri 20-Apr-18 21:06:24

All anyone needs is a tape measure and mn anyway

Much better. In M&S and other places they don't even measure your bare boobs (to the relief of some I am sure). They tell you to 'wear your best fitting bra'. Um duh, what if the whole point of the fitting is that you don't have a well-fitting bra? I have a bra that squashes me in completely and my measurements would be all wrong if I wore it. Some stores measure on top of your clothes. Using one of those bra fitting websites is a much better idea- you can even get your bras from M&S (but in the correct size).

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