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Staying Sane - Positivity during TTC journey

(508 Posts)
KnitKitty Wed 13-Jun-18 18:26:57

Hi ladies,

So, TTC is an anxious and sometimes heartbreaking time and is just a constant roller-coaster of emotions:
Some of us have been trying for a long, long time and just feeling like it will never happen.
Some of us are trying after a previous pregnancy loss.
Some of us aren't seeing eye-to-eye with OHs.
Some of us don't have an OH to lean on and are going through it alone.
Some of us are trying with fertility treatment.
Some of us are trying for our first, and some our fourth
Some of us want to be trying but can't yet for one reason or another.
Some of us are dealing with health issues which may affect fertility or mental health.
And some of us are about to, or have just started trying and might be worrying about how long it will take or if this or that will effect fertility etc etc...

It's just not the funnest journey to be on and I thought we could do with a thread just for positive messages and thoughts.

SO, no negative messages on this thread, but feel free to post:
A positive mantra or affirmation you use or think someone else could use
An idea of how to relax or pass the TTW time
A nice thing that happened to you recently
A success story despite the odds
A picture or word of hope (rainbow pictures most welcome)
A positive message to those who are going through one of the above scenarios at the moment even if you're not on the same journey as they are right now
A nice/positive quote you've read or heard
Or something which brightened up your day

The idea is that anyone having a wobble for whatever reason can come here and soak up some positive energy to help them feel better.

I'll go first:
A mantra I have been repeating to myself at the moment is "Good things happen to me. I accept miracles in my life."

A word of hope for anyone thinking of coming off the pill or who has just come off the pill and who has a history of endometriosis; I have suffered with endo in the past and was very worried that the moment I stopped taking the pill I would get all clogged up with endo again, but I conceived in the second month after coming off the pill and I have a colleague whose wife conceived two children (one the first month after coming off the pill, the second the third month after the pill) without a problem even though she has endo too.

Right, who's with me? Any more positive stuff to share anyone?

CritterTamer Wed 13-Jun-18 20:06:34

Thank you @Knitkitty - what a lovely idea!
I am currently ttc #1 and have struggled with depression through my ttc journey. I’m now doing IVF cycle 1 (EC on Friday!🤞) and my tip for relaxing, passing the time and generally lifting my mood about the whole thing is try fertility yoga. There’s an amazing lady on YouTube who does fertility yoga - search for Yoga Yin. You can do it in the comfort of your own living room and she is just amazing! A couple of months ago my uterus lining was just 6.8mm and today had it measured at 9.5mm and I put it down to her 😊

lolacola13 Wed 13-Jun-18 20:29:15

Great idea for a thread! My favorite is " I am doing everything in my power to create a healthy environment for a baby to grow, the rest is not up to me" sounds a bit odd but it helps me , I take my supplements , stay healthy and make sure we've timed the dtd and after that I can't do anymore . For my personally that is . Everyone has their own battle with this. It helped when I had an early miscarriage a few weeks ago , I did everything I could!

KnitKitty Thu 14-Jun-18 10:48:26

Thanks for joining in CritterTamer and lolacola13.

I'll definitely be giving the fertility yoga a whirl, and I love your affirmation lola!

My bit for today:
When you get the disappointment of AF arriving, try to focus on a new cycle having started; it's potentially the official start date of your pregnancy if you get lucky this month!

I think it's really important not to forget about other focuses in your life when TTC as well, focusing on something else (like decorating your house, learning a new skill or going for a promotion at work) will help take the pressure off life being about trying to get pregnant.

DaisyMay25 Thu 14-Jun-18 12:35:01

Lovely idea for a thread!

Thanks for that suggestion on YouTube @CritterTamer I've got it open on a webpage to give a whirl at some point. I've been meaning to start yoga for my mental state so if this can help with fertility it's a bonus!

For today I'm keeping in mind the Disney quote 'even miracles take a little time'

TinyPaws Thu 14-Jun-18 18:34:09

Love this thread, going to check out that fertility yoga.

Lolacola13 Thu 14-Jun-18 18:38:35

I'm struggling today mentally with ttc . Cd 19 and still no posture opk x been getting v high for over a week now it just won't peak! It's excruciating.Anyone else first cycle like this after a v early miscarriage ? 5-6 weeks? Xx

KnitKitty Thu 14-Jun-18 20:01:35

It's totally normal for your cycles to be different to normal after MC Lolacola13. The ladies over on TTC After Pregnancy Loss Thread 22 are really lovely and supportive, head over there and introduce yourself. smile

DaisyMay25 what a lovely quote! Will definitely remember that one!

A nice thing happened to me today: a little sparrow came and fluttered in front of the French doors in my living room as though it was looking in to say hello. smile

KnitKitty Fri 15-Jun-18 09:24:23

Sometimes I get worried or anxious and then I remember another time I was worried or anxious and I needn't have been, because with hindsight everything was always going to work out just fine in its own time and way. I try to think of that when I need to; imagining my future self looking back at the thing I was worried about and thinking "if only I'd known!"

There's always someone out there wishing you well.

Dassie81 Fri 15-Jun-18 09:53:46

Message withdrawn - wrong thread.

KnitKitty Sat 16-Jun-18 09:52:07

A few ladies on MN have recommended Headspeace which is an app/website to teach you meditation. I've just finished the 10 day free basics for beginners and have really found it helpful. Really worth taking a look if you feel you need a little more peace in your life.

I hope you have a lovely day today. Smile (even if it's through pain) and try and pick out all the good things from your day. smile

CritterTamer Sat 16-Jun-18 10:34:01

Good morning - this is a great day. Had my first IVF cycle egg collection yesterday and retrieved 6 eggs. Just had a call from the clinic to say that all 6 have fertilised - totally unexpected!

lolacola13 Sat 16-Jun-18 11:17:51

@CritterTamer yay!!! Lovely bit of text to read. Fingers crossed for ur big journey etc xoxoxoxoxox

DaisyMay25 Sat 16-Jun-18 12:10:58

@CritterTamer that's absolutely fantastic!! Please keep us updated on your exciting journey. Positive vibes your way thanks

lolacola13 Sat 16-Jun-18 14:08:03

Anyone any apps for destressing meditation etc like headspace I really love but I refuse to pay for the add ons

TinyPaws Sat 16-Jun-18 16:18:32

@lolacola13 10% happier is nice but like headspace you have to pay for most of the content. It does have a fair few free meditations though.

KnitKitty Sat 16-Jun-18 19:06:56

CritterTamer That's absolutely amazing news! :D Yey!!

CritterTamer Sat 16-Jun-18 19:29:04

Thank you all 😊 it’s going to be a long 4 days to transfer day. Think I’ll check out the headspace app to help relax and pass the time xxx

lolacola13 Sat 16-Jun-18 20:22:28

@CritterTamer ur going to have to keep sooo busy lol get plenty of iron in u build a nice cosy nest for the transfer . Are they transferring one or two? Xoxoxox I have everything crossed for u

lolacola13 Sat 16-Jun-18 20:26:08

I made the decision today that I am going to and WILL relax about ttc . I will not be buying clear blue again . Just a few cheapie opks will do me to give me a vague idea and luckily I get cramps too around ov so I will go by that, I am going organize a girls night out and a night away for me and oh to relax . Want to start filling my life with fun stuff and I'm so lucky to have the two dc I have already many women would give anything for that. I just have become so aware of how much pressure I was putting on myself and dp . To the point where it caused an argument recently.where it Consumed my every thought. I am still ttc of course but anyone ever get the feeling they want to start " living" again?? Maybe if I forget it a little everything will fall
Into place ❤️

CritterTamer Sat 16-Jun-18 23:11:51

@Lolacola13 - that is such great advice - it’s just so much easier said than done! I definitely think there’s something to be said for relaxing and taking the stress out of ttc though.

As for embryo transfer, they want to do a 5 day transfer so I guess it depends how many make it to that point. I’m 40 so there are no guarantees. If we end up with 2 good quality embies on Wednesday i will deffo go for the two though - no DC yet and secretly love the idea of twins LOL.

CookieWaffle Sun 17-Jun-18 00:16:19

Hello, yes I definitely need some of this positivity stuff! I have to say how great it is that this place exists! For a subject that some of us don't discuss with friends and family and sometimes not much with partners! It's great that we can have a rant and a moan if we need to and ask advice. OH and I have had a rubbish weekend so we're going out shopping tomorrow! Going to treat ourselves a bit xx

KnitKitty Sun 17-Jun-18 08:54:47

Really hope you get two good quality ones on Wednesday then CritterTamer!

lolacola3 I'm totally with you on trying to not make it the only thing I think about. I keep repeating to myself "it will happen when it happens." I've managed to stay surprisingly chilled out this month so far. I'm around ovulation time (I think) and haven't really DTD very much this month, but I'm just seeing this cycle as a breather. As DaisyMay said, even miracles take a little time.

CookieWaffle it is great this place exists and we can let out all the crazy TTC thoughts with others who understand when we can't discuss it with anyone IRL!
A shopping spree sounds like a good way to relax and take your mind off it. Retail therapy! wink

So what are everyone's feel-good go-to songs?
I like blasting out some upbeat music and doing some crazy dancing in the living room to cheer myself up sometimes. grin

CookieWaffle Sun 17-Jun-18 20:57:03

So we had our trip out shopping today and now having a nice hot bath. Walked past a busker playing Happy by Pharell Williams and I desperately wanted to start singing!

KnitKitty Sun 17-Jun-18 22:50:46

I love that song! Definitely a feel-good one!

I just out-did myself cooking a roast dinner for my OH and my dad for fathers' day. Had a small glass of wine and some ice cream too as a treat. Feel like I could burst!

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