Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Meeting for breakfast - Which of us is being unreasonable.

989 replies

Dandy008 · 02/09/2021 13:17

Im meeting a friend in a few weeks time who lives in a different part of the country to me.

We’ve arranged to have a day out.
It will be her and her husband, myself, my husband and our 18month old son.

As they live some distance, we have decided to book a hotel and stay over night.

My friend has asked me to book a hotel right by her house so that it’s less distance for her to travel to meet us the next day for breakfast.

I’ve agreed to this, even though we could get a cheaper hotel a bit further away.

We were chatting and she said she would come and meet us for breakfast at 10.30am

I explained that DS wakes around 6.30 and is ready for his breakfast at 7am.
I could probably distract him and at a big push take him down for breakfast at 8am

I also explained that it’s a 2 hour drive back home so Ideally we wanted to head home after an early breakfast.
There’s not much for DS to do in the hotel so once we’ve eaten it makes sense to leave.

She told me that 8am is too early for her and her husband (they don’t have kids) and that the best she can do is 10am.

I’ve suggested then that we skip breakfast and I will book a cheaper hotel a bit further away.

She’s since sent me a text telling me I’m being difficult and that my DS will be fine waiting for his breakfast until 10.30am for just one day.

I’m tempted to message back and say her and her husband will be fine having breakfast at 8am for just one day… 🙄

OP posts:
daisypond · 02/09/2021 13:19

YANBU. 10.30 for breakfast?

Toddlerteaplease · 02/09/2021 13:20

Why head home, not have a day out on the way home. Can't you feed DS early and then you all
Meet for breakfast. I wouldn't be keen on an 8am breakfast either!

JustLyra · 02/09/2021 13:20

I would say that the best you can do is 9am and since you’re both being “difficult” you should just leave breakfast out of the equation.

cornflakegirl · 02/09/2021 13:20

Give him breakfast when he wakes, go for a walk, have second breakfast at 10.30 with friends?

GoogleWhacked · 02/09/2021 13:20

She’s since sent me a text telling me I’m being difficult and that my DS will be fine waiting for his breakfast until 10.30am for just one day.

Yeah, cos toddlers are that reasonable! What an idiot?!!

I’m tempted to message back and say her and her husband will be fine having breakfast at 8am for just one day 🙄
Absolutely send this back to her!

Cheeeesecake · 02/09/2021 13:20

Meet them for brunch. Let your DS have his breakfast at a normal time.

CatJumperTwat · 02/09/2021 13:21

Why is she your friend? She sounds really rude.

thistimelastweek · 02/09/2021 13:21

Will the hotel even take orders for breakfast at 10.30?

And they are being unreasonable.

RincewindsHat · 02/09/2021 13:22

I would do exactly that. You're travelling all that way, you have a child, why can she not compromise and get her arse out of bed a little bit earlier for just one day?

Original poster
Dandy008 · 02/09/2021 13:23

@Cheeeesecake

Meet them for brunch. Let your DS have his breakfast at a normal time.
@Cheeeesecake

I thought this, but the cost of the hotel includes a breakfast (there’s no option to pay less and not have breakfast)

So I would be missing out on a breakfast I’ve paid for and then having to pay for a brunch to suit my friend.

I wouldn’t mind doing this, but on this occasion I feel a bit miffed because she seems like she’s being so stubborn.

OP posts:
Abouttoblow · 02/09/2021 13:23

She is being a bit unreasonable asking you to book a hotel close to her to make her life easier but if you do want to have breakfast with them, could you give your DS breakfast at his usual time and then meet them later?

Steelesauce · 02/09/2021 13:23

Just give your son a small breakfast and let him have some toast or something later too?

ssd · 02/09/2021 13:23

Why are you even meeting up, it sounds like you dont really get on

ssd · 02/09/2021 13:24

What i mean is, with a pal I'd sort this out ourselves, not on mn

BlowDryRat · 02/09/2021 13:24

Are you really staying overnight in a hotel just to have breakfast with your friend? That's quite a bit of effort!

I'd get up with your DS, have breakfast early and then meet your friends for brunch/early lunch.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 02/09/2021 13:24

If I made my 8yo wait until 10.30 for breakfast she would be hangry and liable to eat someone Grin if we go for late breakfasts, she and her sister have pre-breakfasts, even if its just fruit and milk/juice.

Ughmaybenot · 02/09/2021 13:26

@Cheeeesecake

Meet them for brunch. Let your DS have his breakfast at a normal time.
If she wasn’t normally a rude twat and this seems to be a one off, I would do this, but really, she’s being an arse here.
Palavah · 02/09/2021 13:26

Have your included breakfast at the time that suits you. Suggest meeting them afterwards for a walk and a coffee if that would suit you? What else was intended for your day out?

Original poster
Dandy008 · 02/09/2021 13:26

@BlowDryRat

Are you really staying overnight in a hotel just to have breakfast with your friend? That's quite a bit of effort!

I'd get up with your DS, have breakfast early and then meet your friends for brunch/early lunch.

@BlowDryRat

No, I’m staying over night as it’s a 2hour drive.

OP posts:
ivykaty44 · 02/09/2021 13:26

Check the times breakfast is served from and to. When I worked in a hotel breakfast was 7-10 in the week and 7 - 10.30 on the weekend

Original poster
Dandy008 · 02/09/2021 13:27

@Palavah

Have your included breakfast at the time that suits you. Suggest meeting them afterwards for a walk and a coffee if that would suit you? What else was intended for your day out?
@Palavah

The day out is on the Saturday.
The breakfast plans are on the Sunday.

OP posts:
DollyPartBaked · 02/09/2021 13:27

I think she is being U - not be not wanting to meet at 8am but by then saying you are being unreasonable to not wait later. I'd skip breakfast with her for this reason.

If you wanted to be accommodating I would bring DS breakfast to have in the room and then go to a park or something and come back for a second breakfast.

TiredButDancing · 02/09/2021 13:27

I don't really understand - you're travelling that far, paying for a hotel all just for breakfast? Why not meet her for post-breakfast activity - walk/national trust/whatever then all have lunch together and then you and DH and DS head home?

ThinWomansBrain · 02/09/2021 13:28

she is being arsey - but then again, would feeding breakfast to son at normal time, then brunch before you head back be a doable option?

(I'd be tempted to miss the breakfast because she is being difficult though - you'll have seen her the day before, and it sounds as if you're travelling to near her home for the privilidge of shelling out for a more expensive hotel)

Brieeeeeeeeeeee · 02/09/2021 13:29

I still think @Cheeeesecake’s suggestion works best and it’s what I do most weekends with my 18mo. He eats at 7-7.30am, which is fine for me during the week. If we have arrangements to meet friends without small children, he’ll get half a croissant or a tangerine to pick at whilst we enjoy coffee or brunch. I think you’re both being weirdly literal about this - the toddler doesn’t need to participate in full.