My colleague came to me in tears and asked to borrow 3k

[Motheroffive999]

She will lose her home and has 3 weeks to find it.
I didn't know what to say , I don't have that amount of money , I have some savings but not that much , and I may need it.
Today she asked for 1k which of course I still do not have at my disposal, but could get it in a few days.
I am torn , I don't want to be unkind but she has bought things recently , lots of small things , things that I do not have the spare money to buy.
What can I do ?

Don’t. Please don’t. Her debt is not your responsibility. And from past experience these types of BIG loans always come back in small amounts and the debt is never repaid fully. The last £200 I would say gets broken up again to smaller amounts. The money ends up frittered away. If she has the audacity to ask a work colleague for money then I can pretty much guarantee there are more problems here. And 100% more debt. Desperate ppl make desperate decisions. Don’t do it op. And don’t feel bad. Would she loan u 1k. Most likely not.

You should advise her to speak to your company.

In my company, we provide short term hardship loans for those in temporary financial difficulty that is repaid straight from payroll over a period of time. It’s not something we advertise, but we always help employees in times of need.

Just say no. My colleague has asked several people at work for “loans” saying she doesn’t have money to feed her daughter. She has never paid anyone back and spends her time in the bookies.

Even £200 is a lot to some at this time of year. Absolutely not

Whether it is out of desperation I cannot be sure but you should not have been put in this position. That’s very unfair to you.
You are not responsible for her.
politely say no and suggest to her to seek citizens advice on the matter

Stepchange are amazing. Put her in touch with them. Don’t lend her money.

Definitely do not lend her money. It sounds like you don’t have it readily available to give yourself and also I suspect it wouldn’t be the only time she asks. It’s not a pleasant situation for her to be in but if she’s in a mess she needs to seek help from somewhere like the citizens advice bureau as a first port of call. I’d also consider talking to your boss if it’s made you uncomfortable because she shouldn’t be asking colleagues for money and she may have asked others. It’s not appropriate. But whatever you do regarding talking to your boss I wouldn’t lend her a penny

Agree - direct her to HR and you could also point her towards other kinds of social care/charities etc if you want to help.

Don't even go there... and it is totally inappropriate of her to ask you.

She needs to go to a bank or money lender for that kind of cash.

Or yes I said citizens advice bureau but step change may be a good port of call instead!

OMG what bullshit!! The UK has such a "duty of care" that you have to give thousands of pounds to practical strangers - I've heard some absolutely batshit stuff on here, but this one is the most fucking ridiculous!!

And yet several people keep giving her money - does she have something on these people?

Don't give her anything she isn't your problem. You have a family of your own to provide for.she has a job she can financially support herself or if she's massively desperate she can ask her family or take a bank loan. Absolutely inform your boss that she has now TWICE asked you for money as she could be harassing other colleagues to give her money also

Don't do it!

Only "lend" her the money if you can afford to give it to her. It sounds like you can't, so don't.

Say "No" to her, and ask her not to broach the subject with you.

Or, alternatively, go really nuclear. Tell her that Yes, you will lend her £3,000 but only if:

• she gives you weekly access to her spending records on her banking app or bank printouts
• she gives you monthly accounts of her income and ougoings, including all hers and her partner's spending
• she accepts that you will veto any large items of expenditure other than mortgage, utilities, and food, unless she has paid you back the agreed monthly amount
• she shows you evidence of taking on a second job to pay you back at a reasonable rate of capital + interest over 12 month.
• Interest is compound at 10% as the loan is unsecured. This is a mate's rate, as a pawnbroker or payday loan shark generally charges around 33% and credit card companies charge around 28% or so.

I don't think she'd agree to any of that, so it's a No.

It doesn't sound like you even know her well. For a brother, sister, child or very best friend that you've known forever, maybe you could try and find some money to lend/give. Otherwise, absolutely not!

She's your colleague, not your best friend or your sister. And you don't have it, so that's that. You can't even be certain she's telling the truth. Ask her if she's talked to the mortgage company - sometimes they can come to agreements with people who are struggling. Tell your employer if she pressures you any more, or if you're aware she's pressuring anyone else, but otherwise stay out of it.

I beg of you, please don’t give this grifter any money.
I bet you £100 that her colleagues in her previous employment would have plenty of tales to tell about her owing money hither and thither.

I would quietly and discreetly tell my LM about it, and hers, too.
Just for background, in case she’s doing it to anyone else.

Im sorry this is not your problem and ask yourself who else has she asked? Why have they turned her down? How has she gotten into this situation? And then remain sympathetic but walk away xx

It's a difficult one but if she approaches you again I would probably speak to my direct manager in confidence and say you are worried about her.

The manager should then be able to have a chat along the lines of "I have noticed you are not yourself lately ..." That's assuming your manager has good people skills. Not all of them do.

It isn't fair for you to be in this position, but like others have said do not get involved its a no brainer really

I completely agree, @DeeThree

Such bleeding heart bollocks.

Just say no. You will never see the money again. Her financial issues are not your problem. It's not like she's asking for 20 quid to put some electricity on the meter. She's asking for 3K.

I'm not able to help you I'm afraid. I don't have any money to spare at all.

Please say no OP. You haven't known her that long, you've already noted that she seems to be a bit careless with money, that should tell you everything.If she can't manage now, how will she repay you? You have doubts which is why you came here. Trust your instincts and say no.

Bloody hell OP - no. Do not do this - you’ll never see the money again and you’ll be her new mark for every emergency cash donation she’s after. Nobody asks someone they hardly know for big loans. Awful behaviour. Say No, don’t explain yourself just say no. If she continues to behave badly then yes have a discussion with your boss or HR. This has scam written all over it.

Say no. Direct her to HR. Some larger companies may have a hardship fund or possibly can offer a loan or an advance. Also she could possibly approach her Trade Union. It is totally inappropriate for the workplace to pester colleagues for money and for that reason I would tell your manager.