Would I be crazy to stay in a 40k role instead of a 75k?!

[worklifedilemma]

On the surface I know YES looks wild...

Here's the dilemma:

I'm a mum to 3 primary age DC, currently in a FT role 40k per year. It's remote mostly with very occasional travel into London (1-2x a month) - I live west of London, very rural, around 1hr30 door to door. It's also technically a self-employed contract which means I can pop expenses onto my tax assessment etc. Also qualify for child benefit etc. I'm a middle manager at a private company, in case that helps context.

Not yet formally offered but going well a side side step career wise (no people management and stand alone), but in a more 'money' direction. (Comparable to say moving from criminal law to corporate - just more money in certain niches). £75k, PAYE. Obviously better pension wise etc as I only have my own self employed one at the moment. Almost double the money at £75k, but where it's PAYE no tax relief on expenses, which would be higher as they would want me in their London HQ 2-3 days per week. This is also longer days and would have to ensure we could make it work with childcare. So my overall expenses would be much higher, job much more taxing due to travel and time in office, and I'd lose child benefit. This would make my take home (after travel) around £400 ish more a month.

Just can't figure out if that £400 is worth the extra work/time/travel less time with the kids etc? Long term career I guess so.

Any words of wisdom? Any thoughts on what you would do if it were you?

@TheDefiant yeah you're right - at this point I have little to lose so could definitely negotiate hard!

Are you a single parent? If not, will your partner be sharing care of the children?

@LadyLapsang not single parent - so DH does /can help - although it would mean if he wanted to move roles he couldn't (he also has higher earning potential than me - significantly so)

There is no way I’d travel to London 2/3 days from that distance, you’ll spend your life on a packed train carriage. Trust me it’s awful and I used to do it from a lot closer.

What expenses can you claim
now though? If you’re SE you can’t claim travel to a regular place of work.

How come your current work isn’t paye - and with pension etc? If you are SE then you set the wage not them. So increase your fee!

I wouldn't personally take it. I'm on a similar amount and could earn more by going full time but I choose not to because I have 2DC who I want to be there for more.

Obviously if you desperately needed the money then do it but if you're surviving ok I'd leave it.

@fashionqueen0123 it's not technically a regular place of work as I'm remote.

They are definitely not operating 100% as they should with the whole self employed contract thing (so can't really change my rate) - another reason not convinced it's the right role long term!

@Sittingonthefence83 thank you - that's the more likely route for me also I think. There will likely be other opportunities with both flexibility & better pay so I need to maybe sit tight for the right move.

@clearquote the school they are at offers good wrap around care and DH can work flexible hours

@clearquote I applied - I saw it pop up on Linkedin and thought it looked interesting - but it was only further into the process I realised how frequently I'd be expected on site.

@clearquote not even close to secondary - eldest is nearly 7.

Yes primary is about 5 minute drive - in the next village, hence I couldn't take the car to the station, as DH would need it for school run.

For £400 that I don't desperately need? No.

Flexibility/WFH etc make life with DC so much easier, this job sounds like it has a load of associated 'logistics faff' that the £400 won't make up for.

@clearquote it is very tough, I guess we're trying to think of the bigger picture and figure out if it's worth it long term for lifestyle/financial security etc.

Can you try and negotiate the new offer down to 1 day/week in the office? More than that sounds like it would be really hard. But future earnings and progression are worth thinking about. Will there be other similar jobs that maybe allow for those but don’t require a soul-destroying commute?

I personally would take the security of a proper PAYE role because of sick pay etc.

Id be worried about your current status - sounds like you should be PAYE.

I'd seriously consider it but would be pushing back hard on the number of days in the office as let's be honest, this will be the killer in terms of time, energy & finances. If you could have 1 set day and then 1 day optional/flexible/business need led that would be very different to 3 days a week commuting. I have similar commute & no way would I do more than 2 days in now and I don't have childcare costs to cover.

Your take home is going to be less than £400/month isn't it? You say after travel. But with 2-3 days and 3 hour commute to London, you'll have to have much better childcare. Unless it's the father of your family doing it for free?

This is a very difficult dilemma. I don't know whether I would but £75k is very tempting.