Working when your child's ill - does your employer understand?

[reddaphne]

Wednesday morning is my team meeting morning. It's the only morning I really need to be in the office. DH has a job interview so he obviously has to go to that.
And guess what DC2 is sick so won't be able to go to nursery.
My boss will be pissed I already know it.
It's so typical!!

How does everyone else juggle child sickness and nursery age kids?

Is your employer understanding?

Sorry to be the one to say it and I’ll be flamed but your childcare isn’t your employer’s problem. You should have back up.

It's not quite that easy when a child is unwell though surely? My DM is always my back up childcare but I'm not sending my DS there when he's unwell, what if she catches his illness? Stupid comment really.

I'm 6 months into a new job with an 18 month old so this has been an issue multiple times! Me and DH try to split the load as much as possible, depending on who's got the busier day, who needs to be in the office, etc, but things don't always align.

I just try to accept that my manager might be pissed but remind myself that an ill child isn't a stackable offense! I'll try to stay on top of emails during nap times etc but there's only so much you can do.

It’s not stupid just because you disagree?? How rude!
Of course it applies when the child is unwell, childcare backup is just that! How is it the employers problem?

If you're an office worker, in most jobs I've had, especially in the age of Zoom and wfh, they would be understanding. You can take a day sick if the child is sick. It is understood that you will make every effort to make alternative arrangements but this is not always possible. If your DH has a job interview I'd say that was your back up option tbh and the back up has failed. I would offer to dial into the meeting.

Yes happened today, work absolutely fine. I’m in the NHS and we can have up to three days carers leave per year to use in emergencies like this. I used one today but actually did loads of work from home.

On the flip side as a manager, I always expect parents to look after their kids 50/50. So if a female with a partner is asking for a data leave to look after sick kids I always say yes, but I will have a chat with them about expectations for the rest of the sickness period to make sure they’re not all lumbered with the care. I expect the other parent to pull their weight, unless they’re something super critical and hard to cover like an AED consultant.

Who has back up childcare in place? that’s ridiculous.

We get 3 days paid a year for child sickness. DH can be more flexible as works from home some of the week.

I work in education, they never question it and are understanding. DH works for a company again they are totally understanding.

On here everyone will tell you that you should have backup, but if like us you have no family that can help then you have to do it all of it.

They will unserstand, more-so if they have had or are experiencing first hand child care with young kids - yes its sad but its often women without kids that bicker as i recall when i worked - this was our office - one was anti children she was a sensior and could not keep her trap shut when someone rang in with child care probs and she'd say, Oh, not again" - I found the cow amusing but tried to keep on the right side of her

We used annual leave and shared the time off.

MN bat shittery, back in the real world childcare back up is perfectly Normal, neither ridiculous or stupid!

Yes very understanding.

Sorry to be the one to say it and I’ll be flamed but your childcare isn’t your employer’s problem. You should have back up.

back up? Of what sort? You can’t get random people to come and look after sick children. And, actually it is the employers problem and parents are entitled to time off.

Bosses mainly good about it

This is why you have a statutory right to emergency leave for dependents.

If there was childcare back up surely the child wouldn't be in nursery in the first place but with the 'back up'?

It becomes an employer's problem regardless as the parent has to take short term notice leave in the same way someone who has had a heart attack or some other unexpected illness.

Are you saying that when you're ill you have a back up person on standby (for example a family member or friend) who does your job for you? At the end of the day it's not your employer's problem you're sick!

Emergency leave for unwell dependents is unpaid - employer can choose to pay.

Where I work has a policy where we can take 8 days of leave (paid) in the year for caring for dependants. You can't get penalised for using it. Management very supportive. I've only ever used it when my child was genuinely unwell, I'm sure there are some that take the piss but generally work with a really good bunch. I'm very lucky.

If you’re sick yourself you’re usually unable to work.

No, it's not the employers problem. They've every right go be pissed off when it's the one day in a week that OP needed to be in the office. OP isn't saying she's been refused time off at all.

It is NOT the employers problem. No matter how you dress it up, your child, your problem.

@Whatevershallidowithmylife well they can be pissed off then, but not sure what your point is? Bottom line you’re entitled to stay at home to look after dependents. Facts innit

To add, it's not often I keep my child off school. He's had two three sick days this year. One because he had a temperature and had a seizure (febrile, he was fine), and two because of d&v. Can't exactly ask someone to look after your child as backup when they've got a vomiting bug.

It is NOT the employers problem. No matter how you dress it up, your child, your problem

I mean it’s not really a problem for me or for the op is it? Just stay at home. Job done. 🤷🏼

Your husband should have done it. So what he had an interview. He didn't have a job.

They have never given me any trouble for needing to care for a sick child.

we have an employer sponsored backup nanny service, but it is for if our childcare fails, not if our child is out sick.

Im not saying it's my employers problem I know it's my problem.

I can't get someone else to look after my young child. They need to be in their own home with me.

I'm just having a moan knowing it'll be frowned upon between my team.

I can see this being a long thread now lol...