Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Work

Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Employer have said I have resigned - I haven't. Urgent help please!

999 replies

Titslikepicassos · 06/11/2020 18:25

I have a loooong thread in AIBU and received excellent support but things have escalated.

Long story short, I went on maternity leave this time last year. I had issues at work throughout my pregnancy, being shouted at and sidelined and told to move locations. Sorted it all out informally.

In March I asked to return to work early from Mat leave due to financial issues caused by lockdown. At this point my boss attempted to move me again, that didn't work and she then went back on the hours she had given me and it messed up my childcare.

I raised a formal grievance and put a flexible working request in at the same time. The company failed to do anything with my request and the grievance process was mismanaged and a data breach occurred in the middle of it, where my grievance letter was upload to a public file and seen by others.

The grievance was upheld in parts but they again tried to move me to a new location which doesnt work due to childcare issues.

I requested mediation with my boss in order to go back to work as I'm still not back 7 months later.

Today the regional director has said that they won't honour mediation and I have now resigned.

My union rep has disappeared and I received this at 16:00 today so couldn't get hold of ACAS.

Any advice would be very welcome!

OP posts:
ladycarlotta · 27/04/2021 10:46

OP, I've been reading your story since it all first went down and I'm horrified for you. I'm so sorry this has happened. You are an absolute hero for powering on through this, not blinking. I hope you know how many people are cheering you on out here.

riceuten · 27/04/2021 11:59

They are saying you resigned because they know they are on shaky grounds to dismiss you.

Ask for your "resignation letter" or proof of why they think you resigned

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 27/04/2021 12:58

Am sure they will settle-hold strong and no blinking!

NotSorry · 27/04/2021 13:17

@riceuten

They are saying you resigned because they know they are on shaky grounds to dismiss you.

Ask for your "resignation letter" or proof of why they think you resigned

might be worth reading the whole thread - this has moved on since the thread was started 5 months ago
Peachylovesherpoochy · 27/04/2021 14:06

OP I am watching for updates and cheering you on - I can’t believe the crap they have put you through

LannieDuck · 27/04/2021 16:59

I was following your first thread and lost it. Assumed I'd never find out how it ended... and then I discover it hasn't! I can't imagine how stressful it's all been, you have my utmost sympathy.

PearPickingPorky · 27/04/2021 17:07

Did they think they could mitigate your settlement by withholding part of your wages?!

Tistheseason17 · 27/04/2021 21:55

@Humpthree
Aw, thanks - it's amazing that you can find this inner strength like a lioness! I still surprise myself that I was prepared to do it. If you cut me like a stick of rock it would say "honest" in the core.

LakieLady · 01/05/2021 11:48

Hope you're doing ok @Titslikepicassos. This has been going on for so long, you must be starting to feel like it will never end.

Hold fast, and don't let the bastards grind you down. I reckon they're hoping you'll settle just to so you have some closure. Don't give up and I'm sure there offer will increase at the last minute.

They're not just any sort of bastards, they're gold-plated incompetent bastards imo. Stay strong, and squeeze every last penny out of them.

Sagaris · 01/05/2021 12:22

Hang in there OP - they obviously thought you would have given up by now. Looking forward to a very good outcome for you - you deserve it!

Ringsender2 · 04/05/2021 17:29

@Sagaris

Hang in there OP - they obviously thought you would have given up by now. Looking forward to a very good outcome for you - you deserve it!
likewise!
20newnames · 10/05/2021 12:31

Just checking in. Hope you're doing ok OP.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 21/05/2021 16:50

Hi all

Thanks for the continuing support - I'm trying to limit my time on here because I quickly become all consumed by the situation and end up furious.

I've had the ET3 back today. In regard to my 'resignation' the company have stated that my employment was terminated (so I didn't resign then?! Confused) because my line manager refused mediation and said she would resign if I returned, which would have caused operational difficulties. I knew this was likely the case, as around the time mediation should have been arranged, the office manager informed me that they had overheard a phone call between my line manager and the regional manager discussing me, which ended in my line manager crying and screaming.

OP posts:
mateysmum · 21/05/2021 16:59

OK...So they chose to sack you whilst on maternity leave because it was inconvenient and your line manager threw a hissy fit.

Probably nothing that you didn't know already but surely that contradicts their earlier statements (that you had resigned), is illegal and essentially an admission that they had no grounds for your dismissal and failed to make reasonable efforts to resolve the situation?

needagirlsnight · 21/05/2021 17:02

So this also means they are admitting unfair dismissal because they did not take you through any process with a reason for dismissal!

They sound so incompetent and it's embarrassing for them!

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 21/05/2021 17:31

Not sure why they didn't just continue with the fake resignation. Their new story doesn't exactly cover them with glory and makes my line manager sound like a 3 year old.

OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 21/05/2021 17:33

@Titslikepicassos

Hi all

Thanks for the continuing support - I'm trying to limit my time on here because I quickly become all consumed by the situation and end up furious.

I've had the ET3 back today. In regard to my 'resignation' the company have stated that my employment was terminated (so I didn't resign then?! Confused) because my line manager refused mediation and said she would resign if I returned, which would have caused operational difficulties. I knew this was likely the case, as around the time mediation should have been arranged, the office manager informed me that they had overheard a phone call between my line manager and the regional manager discussing me, which ended in my line manager crying and screaming.

Wow. At least they were honest, I suppose! Aren't they bloody idiots though?

Fingers crossed a settlement isn't too far away.

NoWordForFluffy · 21/05/2021 17:41

@Titslikepicassos

Not sure why they didn't just continue with the fake resignation. Their new story doesn't exactly cover them with glory and makes my line manager sound like a 3 year old.
Their solicitor would have read everything and isn't allowed to mislead the Court. So they couldn't keep going with the resignation story in reality (I assume it's signed with a Statement of Truth?).

I really do hope it's the beginning of the end for you. Flowers

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 21/05/2021 19:43

I'm concerned that the 'any other substantial reason for dismissal' they're suggesting (breakdown in employee relationships) means that they can get away with it - you don't necessarily have to follow any procedures to dismiss for this reason.

Angry
OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 21/05/2021 20:21

They have to show that the dismissal was a reasonable thing to do in the circs. It was a reaction to a toddler tantrum from the manager, that wasn't reasonable.

Did your solicitor say they wouldn't necessarily have to follow process for that reason? I only studied employment law at law school, I've never practised it, sadly.

NoWordForFluffy · 21/05/2021 20:24

This is really useful in explaining it. I'm not convinced it'll fly. They've probably stuck it in to give you the sense of litigation risk so you negotiate a lower settlement.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 21/05/2021 21:01

Thanks @NoWordForFluffy - my solicitor expected them to go down this route but said it doesn't really
stick. I asked for mediation and was mentally quite unwell throughout the process which didn't lift until I was medicated and was then mentally well enough to enter mediation.

OP posts:
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep · 21/05/2021 21:44

I've just spent an hour reading all your posts on this @Titslikepicassos and I'm invested now!
I really hope you get a decent outcome soon. Are you looking for another job now schools and nurseries are open?

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 21/05/2021 22:13

@Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep

I've just spent an hour reading all your posts on this *@Titslikepicassos* and I'm invested now! I really hope you get a decent outcome soon. Are you looking for another job now schools and nurseries are open?
Thanks @Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep

My baby is on two waiting lists for nurseries, so I can't do anything before then but I've been accepted into university to study social work which is the industry I've worked in for the last decade. I didn't need the degree prior to losing my job as I was in the middle of a work place qualification which allowed me to progress. However, I lost that and the work I did when I 'resigned'.

OP posts:
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep · 21/05/2021 22:14

Amazing! I did wonder if you were in social care...actually my heart sank as I've recently moved into a social work manager job and it all sounded a bit close to home!

Swipe left for the next trending thread