Will anyone ever give my DH another chance

[DesperateToHelpMyHudband]

Hi I have name changed for this.

Long story for background:

My husband is in his early 50's. We have been married 25 years and have 3 teenage daughters.

When my husband was a teenager he and some other boys were convicted for armed robbery and he spent 3 years in prison.

When he was released he was determined to turn his life around and after much searching he landed a roll in the finance department of a large company. He worked his way up over the years and became a manager and a well respected member of staff. He worked his socks off and never took any time off sick.

When he applied for the job they didn't ask him if he had a criminal record and he didn't declare it. Fast forward 30 years and because of new regulations in the industry his company decided to do a retrospective criminal record check. Before they could do that he disclosed it to the senior partner in the London office. They suspended him straight away and after deliberation by a committee in a different country that have never met him they decided to get rid of him with a small pay out.

This was six months ago and he cannot get another job. Nobody is giving him a chance. He has tried everything but no luck with anything at all.

It breaks my heart. He is a totally different person to that teenager all those years ago. He was such a loyal member of staff. He worked long hours and never took a day off sick for the first 20 years and even then only because he had to.

He would be an asset to any company but is he destined for the scrap heap?

He can't even get a manual labour job. I know people will say he should work for himself but doing what ?

@TheMotherofAllDilemmas

Could you try at beast reading the OP’s posts ?!

He got a 6 year sentence & served 3 years. It is NOT spent. Fucking ridiculous - but that’s how it is.

That's really sad. People do change and he shouldn't still be made to suffer for the things he did as a teenager. I really hope his work see sense and re employ him.

Can you think about how to increase your own earning power?

There is sadly massive ageism in employment and I'm sure this could be as big a hurdle as the conviction. Does DH have a hobby that he could monetarise?

Or could he set up as a self employed book keeper or IFA?

@AmelieTaylor, lesson learned, thank you!

So sorry OP. My dp is 55...has a Msc etc...I think ageism is definitely an issue....

I think also the problem is a lot of companies are probably thinking if his own company didn't keep him with such an exemplary record then why should someone else employ him

I agree that this could be a big factor, OP.

Ageism is probably also a huge factor in his ability to get another job, sadly.

I'm a self employed contractor and have always had to have a dbs check for every contract I've worked on. Companies that want checks for permanent workers are likely to want the same checks for temporary workers and contractors.

Did his settlement agreement include a reference?

Gosh, I wish people would rtft before simply repeating info that is incorrect. The OP has provided the facts. It's so frustrating as the thread doesn't move on.

My friends husband spent 8 years in prison for the same offence as a teen, so at least yours was lucky.
friends dh knew he'd be unemployable so trained in car mechanics and opened up his own business.
Your dh has been very fortunate to last as long as he has, tbh. My ds works in finance and you have to be squeaky clean.

Op when he applies for other jobs is he explaining his contract was terminated and why?

He's in s difficult position because if he applies for new jobs, he could agree with his previous employer to say he resigned, the issue is if they say in s reference why he left, seven years for armed robbery is obviously significant.

I think the only way out of this is to speak to his previous employer, agree it was resignation, I'm surprised he wasn't offered the opportunity, and if they agree not to mention it in references where they feel it's not relevant.

I doubt they would agree to it, but I'm struggling to see another way round it.

On the other hand is there a way for you to get back into more gainful employment?

tesco and Asda are taking on, and Aldi paying more than £10 an hour.
How did he manage not to disclose his record, I thought it was law.
OP, your dh has been so lucky to have had a job in finance at all, he needs to start looking at low paid work because he's unemployable for the big money, unless he starts his own business.

I know he's changed but you can't minimise threatening someone with gun. This is what people will consider, whether it's fair or not.

The age thing as well, will go against him, has he tried M&S or B&Q, Mackies.

"When he applied for the job they didn't ask him if he had a criminal record and he didn't declare it."

All these posters who have said Dh LIED haven't read the OP.
Because he wasn't asked!

He's previous employers have said they will give him a glowing reference.

Sorry I didn’t think about the length of sentence just that he had been in prison 3 yrs so had assumed it was spent sorry again

What position did he hold?
Is he the equivalent of a qualified accountant? He needs advice on how to transfer his skills to being....., a finance manager/ high end accounts type job, in industry. Or transfer his skills to at least something.

@Beachcomber1 Goodness. Both you and your dm must have been terrified.
I hope they got the robbers.
And this is the problem because OP I feel so much for you and your family but I can also see that any potential employer will unfortunately not bother even reading past your dh's criminal declaration.

I do hope he finds something.

Then he's not being employed due to his record. I'm assuming he is not disclosing unless asked? Or does every application ask?

I'd maybe look at his cv writing skills etc.

@bluntness I assume as he had a small pay out it was more like being made redundant.

You wouldn't be paid out for being sacked or resigning surely.

@Drabarni

Tesco and Asda are taking on, and Aldi paying more than £10 an hour

Do you know where the OP LIVES?🙄
Thought not.

How did he manage not to disclose his record, I thought it was law

30. THIRTY years ago the world was a different place, he was a young man trying to rebuild his life. They didn’t ask.

OP, your dh has been so lucky to have had a job in finance at all

Or he studied and worked hard to change his life around and do well.

he needs to start looking at low paid work

He HAS been, but he’s hugely over qualified to stack shelves & flip burgers- they know he won’t stay.

because he's unemployable for the big money, unless he starts his own business

Not necessarily. He just needs to find a company that basis their decisions on 30 years of exemplary behaviour and not a stupid act as a teenager

People would be astounded if they knew how many people have convictions of armed robbery & that it doesn’t mean there was actually anyone in the building when it took place Or that the convicted person even had a gun themselves.

I know he's changed but you can't minimise threatening someone with gun. This is what people will consider, whether it's fair or not

As above - that’s not even necessarily the case.

The age thing as well, will go against him

That’s the only part of your post I agree with, sadly it’s true. Though less so for men in financial type services.

The issue is always going to be the unspent conviction and more specifically what it is for. I'm not surprised that a financial firm didn't want an armed robber in their employ, whether reformed out not - it's a reputational issue.

Public sector does Criminal record checks by the way, I doubt they'd employ him.

I think most employers will hesitate to employ him tbh. Not just because of the conviction itself but also because of the circumstances of his dismissal. He wasn't asked so he didn't tell, so strictly speaking he didn't lie. He obviously knew it would be a problem because he fessed up as soon as he knew the game was up. But equally he must have known that he wouldn't get the job if he did disclose it to them, so therefore was it a deliberate omission? I think many people would decide the latter.

In these situations the circumstances surrounding the apparent dishonesty can actually trump the original issue itself - an employer might not have minded the conviction itself but strongly objects to employing someone who demonstrates dishonesty.

SinkGirl Try reading again. He DIDN'T lie about it. It was never brought up. It was not an issue at the time of employment 30 years ago.

Sigh. That is literally what I said.

They're discussing this issue just now on radio 4, might be worth a listen, not sure if there's any solution suggested though..

Is it just me that finds it so ironic that of all the careers he choose to be in finance.
An armed bank robber working with money .
But OP , I do feel for you. It is a very real situation you are both facing and unemployment in your 50s is so difficult . Add his conviction and it must be hard to see any possibility.
I hope your family will be OK in the near future and things work out for you.

@Frenchw1fe people get paid off all the time to leave.

They took the view it was better to pay him off and have him sign an NDA than run the risk of him doing a daily mail sad face article/write a book as per previous suggestions and/or have clients question their processes/behaviour.