Will anyone ever give my DH another chance

[DesperateToHelpMyHudband]

Hi I have name changed for this.

Long story for background:

My husband is in his early 50's. We have been married 25 years and have 3 teenage daughters.

When my husband was a teenager he and some other boys were convicted for armed robbery and he spent 3 years in prison.

When he was released he was determined to turn his life around and after much searching he landed a roll in the finance department of a large company. He worked his way up over the years and became a manager and a well respected member of staff. He worked his socks off and never took any time off sick.

When he applied for the job they didn't ask him if he had a criminal record and he didn't declare it. Fast forward 30 years and because of new regulations in the industry his company decided to do a retrospective criminal record check. Before they could do that he disclosed it to the senior partner in the London office. They suspended him straight away and after deliberation by a committee in a different country that have never met him they decided to get rid of him with a small pay out.

This was six months ago and he cannot get another job. Nobody is giving him a chance. He has tried everything but no luck with anything at all.

It breaks my heart. He is a totally different person to that teenager all those years ago. He was such a loyal member of staff. He worked long hours and never took a day off sick for the first 20 years and even then only because he had to.

He would be an asset to any company but is he destined for the scrap heap?

He can't even get a manual labour job. I know people will say he should work for himself but doing what ?

I am very sorry you and your family are going through this and I congratulate your husband for successfully turning his life around - that couldn't have been easy.

While I fully appreciate that your husband's dismissal seems unfair to you, the problem is always with ad hoc cases which only nominally fit a category designed around a majority. Unfortunately, that is not going to change. With full appreciation of what it may mean to an employee in question and with a heavy heart - I'd make the same decision as that committee in the US - with or without knowing the employee in person. Otherwise, they'd be a significant legal liability for the entire firm with potential consequences for more than one person and their family. It is really a matter of following the rules, as unfair as they me be in a specific case, and putting the interest of the collective over the interest of an individual.

I also don't think your husband's problem is his age - not in the financial sector - compliance is a major thing (I work in finance) and we are literally drilled on it daily and make very rigorous checks on all people who work for us either as full employees or contractors.

Has he considered consulting with companies abroad? Some countries have significantly looser rules and he could probably do it online with some travel.

I'm struggling to be sympathetic

Really? I would hate to be held responsible thirty years on for mistakes I made in my youth, that isn't to underestimate the effect on the original victims. Isn't there room in life for sympathy to both sides?
I hope that the OP and her family are able to get their lives back on track very soon.

Please read this document

It is your DH’s right not to disclose convictions once they have been spent.

I may be wrong I was under the impression that after a certain period of the conviction is spent and you no longer have to declare it.
I would suggest your husband checks this out, and if so, stops being quite so brutally honest

Sentences of imprisonment of more than 2.5 years are never spent.

And if it was 6 months ago he’s too late to pursue a claim for unfair dismissal. Plus if they gave him a payout he may have signed a settlement agreement anyway. That aside, it may not have been an unfair dismissal if regulations meant it was going to be impossible to continue to employ him.

So sorry OP. I’d also suggest seeing if there are charities who can help.

Totally off the track, but one of my friends DH has been made redundant from a similar high flying job in his late 40's.
He gave up after 2 years of searching for an other job in related industries. ( He had limited official qualifications & Agisem is rife!)
He is now working in health care in an advisory role - after working as a temporary care assistant for the company.

Maybe he can do something on these lines? Prison service, young offenders, social services... there are some areas where his past does not matter as longas he is honest. As for pay, whatever he does next, it will most certainly be a lot less than his previous job.

He should be proud of turning his life around. So sorry that's he's going through this now. I agree with the poster who said he needs to downplay the seniority on his CV - that will give him a chance of at least getting an interview. Otherwise could he sign up for temp office work? There have been some good links on the thread for charities so hopefully one of those will be able to help also.

Good luck Op!

Ah over 4 years, it must have changed, used to be 2.5

Definitely contact organisations like Unlock,the Forward Trust and Plias, they will be best placed to help with employment

Sorry I haven't RTFT - is there anyway you can look at setting up your own business?!?

I was 6 and “helping” in my mother’s shop when three armed robbers came in and held a gun to my head while they made her empty the till.
Kind of wish this thread had a trigger warning.

Anyway...

OP, can you increase your earnings to bridge the gap until he can draw down his pension?

His conviction and age will make it very difficult for him.

I'd go to the charityjob website, finance staff jobs at charities are usually among the best paid of jobs in the charity sector. As you're usually the finance one in a varied team I don't imagine it has the same regulation hoops as 'the finance industry's.

Alternatively (or in the meantime) go freelance, freelance bookkeeping or accounting, I imagine there is demand. In one job I liaise with a freelance bookkeeper/accountant and discovered that they had a past life in prison for violent crime decades ago. I thought really because they were so lovely, but like your husband completely reformed like that was in another life. I never asked them about it, it didn't seem fair when they'd turned their life around. Anyway they seemed to be much in demand and always having to say no to taking on new clients.

Good luck to you both

Read up on the owner/MD/CEO of Timpsons and consider contacting him direct for advice. He's a really interesting guy.

Maybe apply for a job that doesn't require dealing with money and just don't declare it? Ok it's dishonest, and he could end up with an instant dismissal, but he would at least have a job if the question never arose.

Retrain as an accountant and work for himself?

I also wondered about something in the prison service or social services. He would be such a good role model for young prisoners trying to turn their lives around.

Good Luck. I hope things work out.

Most charities require most staff members to be CRB checked, so he's going to have to be upfront about his past. You definitely need to talk to your daughters about this.

Do you have a university near you? The one I work for has signed up for a scheme to give ex-offenders a fair chance of employment (sorry, can’t remember name of scheme). The Civil Service has something similar too.

It may not just be the conviction. It may just be his age and the fact that he's now too expensive and qualified for lower jobs ... I've seen other men lose their jobs at that age and find it very very had to get another job.

I do aympathise.

Timpson employ ex offenders.

Take a look at the higher education sector. Most universities have very transparent policies about hiring ex-offenders and undertake not to discriminate against them. They see that as part of their community engagement / social responsibility remit.

Pret employ ex offenders but not sure if that is just for the shop floor or head office as well.

It may not just be the conviction. It may just be his age and the fact that he's now too expensive and qualified for lower jobs ... I've seen other men lose their jobs at that age and find it very very had to get another job

This

I hate to say it but I think this has a big element of common or garden ageism. (I‘m the same age...)

I wonder if working with a career coach could also help him think laterally about new directions? As others have said, it's hard to think creatively when you're under stress. Hope it all works out (and I also think you should tell your children, maybe with the support of a professional such as a family therapist).

i just want to add like pp of the age thing.its bloody terrible.i know many men who have been conveniantly been made redundant ater giving their whole working lives to careers.at big companies like rolls royce especially.and they have really taken a beating when trying to find more.so give your dh a hug and mke sure he knows it wont always be about his past.and its still shitty, but many time its might be to do with age.
one of my friends had a birthday the other day and he wouldnt even tell his new collegues as it wouldnt be a good idea to tell them his age.i was shocked stupidly at how bad it is towards ageism.
i take it hes look at both contract work and permanent. contract work might help as its shorter term so they might give it to the older gentleman easier.