Message for Xenia

[opinionsrus]

What I would like to ask is how exactly do you find so much spare time to chat on these boards about earning between £100k and £250k when you have five children of your own and also what seems must be a very demanding full time job?

I have just one child and a very part time job and this will be about the only 5 minutes I get to luxuriate on the internet?

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I wish I knew

I live in the outer hebrides so all this legal jargon and name dropping means bugger all to me

If I find out I promise Ill CAT you though

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sadly me too dior!

me too!

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me three

I'm just a mother who works like lots of women.

The point is "Xenia" now that we have found out that yes you are a very real person etc etc you are out of the league of the vast majority of the users here on mums.net.

The website is open to all and that is the way it should be, and you will probably have found you are welcome on here.

My only gripe here is that the sub-section is entitled "Going back to work". With your eldest being 22 or around about this age and your youngest being 8 I don't think it really fits into the category of "Going back to work".

For most people these days "Going back to work", means going back to work or continuing with their careers months, and sometimes as shown on here, even weeks after having given birth.

By the time my eldest is 22 I would shoot myself if I was not working full time. Everyone can make their own choices however.

My point is that any "self-congratulating" would be more appropriately given to those mothers who return to work very very early on, either through personal choice or necessity, either way.

Thats all.

eh?

xenia didn't start this thread in going back to work you did???

and i post in going back to work and my youngest is 18 so you are wrong opinionsrus..

I was relating to an earlier thread.

But she did, ORS...

Not sure what your point is?

I don't get why the age of your eldest child is relevant anyway, it's the youngest that would be the point, surely?

And there was me thinking MN was open to all....how wrong I was!!

Anyones perspective is relevant i would think. But some have more experience on a topic than others. From what I have seen elsewhere - Xenia went back to work when her lo's were less than 3 mths old - and she's had 5 of them, so, I'm guessing her opinion is probably more relevant than most!

you could argue that the people with the most relevent opinions are the grown up children of sahm and working mums. I suspect that there are more influences from a whole range of environmental aspects which includes whether a mother/ father worked inside or outside the home as to what is the best thing to do.

When the 22 year old was 2 weeks I went back to work full time. That's unusual so I think it's interesting to hear from someone who did that and wanted to, as well. Also the twins are only just 8 a week ago. It's not a massive time since I had babies really. But there is a big difference in terms of age and life stage with people and you do get different views and perspectives. Me as a mother who had gone through the teenage years with 3 I feel that's a big thing to have done and that I have things in common with parents, particularly men, who have had teenagers more than those who just have smaller children.

It's a pity we can't pass our wisdom to our children that we have at 44 that perhaps they might find useful if they become mothers at 22 as I did or perhaps the world just doesn't work like that. Talking to people of 50 - 60 too I find fascinating as well, another stage.

I was just listening to a debate on Radio 4 about freedom of speech. Those against it did so badly. I think it's great I can be criticised. If we had a mumsnet where everyone was one kind of person or mother and they hung around with each other what kind of place is that - it's like the Masons or particular kinds of clubs for races, sexes, classes or whatever where people feel comfortable because they're with "their own"... awful. Having the chance to exchange views with mothers who liked being back at work after 2 weeks, who love their jobs, who think working benefits children and also for others hearing from SAHM who think leaving under 5s damages them, isn't that great - to hear those views. Don't you like to see someone who disagrees with you so you can challenge them and my be even convince them to give up spanking their child or whatever the thing might be?

xenia...i would like to withdraw the comments i made earlier...you have explained yourself in such a clear way and i have apparently misjudged you ...... and apologise again..

come on over to the ' Working mothers with larger than average families' thread, Xenia...we are trying to kick off a useful discussion/exchange of ideas for those of us who enjoy working fulltime and parenting fulltime...what's helped/hindered you etc...

I find it interesting and heartening to hear from women like Xenia who have managed to continue working at their career while bringing up children. Sometimes the difficulties of being a mother working in a male-dominated environment seem insurmountable, and it is very helpful to know that it is possible. You may not agree with all that Xenia says, but her perspective and experience are valid and useful.

Xenia your most recent comments are much more articulate. Its a shame that your dislike and disdain for others exercising choices different to your own were so superior and judgemental. My issue with you on this subject stemmed from contempt I felt that you showed for sahm or d's, which bordered on the misogynistic.

'Its a shame that your dislike and disdain for others exercising choices different to your own were so superior and judgemental.'

And people with disabilities and learning challenges, plebs, unwashed masses and other such ilk.

???sorry expat, I normally get ( and disagree ) what you are saying but it been a long day of vomit and leaky bottoms.

I'm just carrying on from the other thread about private schools, magic.

Know what you mean, though! It's snotty noses and coughs around here.

I pay highly to send mine to school..........It costs me at least a year of my life trying to get them, dressed, fed and out of the house with combed hair ( the latter being optional) Dont get me started on private schools though......