What is a “good experience” in a women’s toilet?

[MyAmpleSheep]

From Reddit.

List your good experiences of using single sex spaces of your gender?

Cheer up everyone’s day by listing your good experiences of using single sex spaces.
Helping fix a woman bra, giving a woman a pad, receiving compliments from women…

Can GI supporting people see why examples of a “good experience” for a trans-identifying man in a women’s toilet being - (first) to play with a woman’s underwear and (second) get involved in her menstruation - is profoundly unhelpful?

Wouldn’t a “good experience” simply be to use the facilities and leave?

How does this “cheer up everyone’s day״?

Clean, no queue, soap, working hand dryer. Never in my 52 years been asked for a pad, helped with a bra and barely ever spoken to anyone to be honest, it simply doesn’t happen. I have however helped a single dad with a daughter on a few occasions because he felt uncomfortable taking her into the gents and I have said I’ll keep an eye (talking about a 5+ self sufficient child)

Some loos are definitely more convivial than others, but I can confirm no one’s ever tweaked my bra strap, invited or otherwise.

Isn’t it interesting how often these people’s idea of ‘lady things’ are expressed in terms no biological woman would recognise? Women congregating in toilets to fiddle with each other’s underwear, scattering ‘pads’ freely wherever they go, like little menstrual fairies.

They collectively seem to imagine we all regularly get caught short in a public loo by a completely unexpected period, and end up hollering for sanpro from the bog stall - something I’ve never done, or witnessed, in almost 60 years of using public loos alongside thousands of other women. In a pinch, most of us would use loo roll as a temporary measure.

It’s total fantasy, rooted more in the performative femininity of drag than any actual woman’s lived experience, and only a whisker away from a breathless, giggling pillow fight where we all somehow end up naked and kissing …

It is a total fantasy - the OP was trolling.

No matter if it is a troll or not. These questions regularly pop up in the trans threads of Reddit. I have read those several times.

But what the heck do these trans identifying male fetishists think women do in their toilets? Do they have the fantasy that porn is happening in there and they are left out?

I have never in my whole life asked anyone in a public toilet to help me with my clothing except my best girlfriends when we went clubbing as young adults. I also have never asked anyone for a pad or a tampon. When I forget to bring one, I either bought myself what I needed or asked a person I know before I went in the toilet or took a whole lot of toilet paper.

Just to be clear - I absolutely prefer bleeding through my pants and embarass myself before I would ask a weird looking trans women for a tampon and be their validation of the day.

Please let‘s do a survey - has any woman ever asked stranger trans woman for a pad or a tampon in a public restroom? I just can‘t believe this has ever happened.

Btw shout out to my local pubs who all offer baskets of sanitary items, deodorant etc in the ladies loos with the exception of Wetherspoons who don’t. Apart from the aforementioned chain they are all spotlessly clean … why? Nearly all the pubs in my town have landladies not men running them! Lovely bunch of women too, I meet up with them with the local women in business breakfasts

In a pub near my mum's house, the new management have (in their ultimate wisdom) taken out the tampon machine and replaced it with... A laminated sign that says you can take a (velcroed on) heart to the bar and bar staff will give you free sanitary products 'no questions asked'. 🤣

I mean who the chuff thought that getting women to give heart tokens to teenaged male bar staff in exchange for free sanitary products was an all-round awesome plan?

in my 55 years I have a facebook full of girls I have met in loos and will never see again
swapped makeup
asked where a dress/ top/ shoes are from

told each other we look amazing
confirmed significant other does not deserve you
cried
agreed to walk various dogs
been invited to weddings and mini breaks 😂😂

it’s a joyous thing a toilet friend

Please do share one of these other regular posts about fiddling with bras or sharing tampons in the lady's loo, I'm sure you'll easily be able to find one if they come up so regularly.

Or perhaps pause to consider first that you've written an entire angry rant about what you think trans people think based on a fake post. Either you've played straight into the trolls hands by getting outraged about their made-up post, or you've demonstrated you're quite happy to accept obviously fake "evidence" so long as it supports what you already believe (which is quite possibly also what the troll hoped you would do).

but I have never knowingly met a trans person in the loo
not once in 55 years

When it’s a proper cubicle with doors that go down to the floor, and it’s clean with a functioning loo roll dispenser, and it doesn’t smell bad, and there’s soap in the soap dispensers, and I haven’t had to queue for half an hour to get in.

Bonus points if I’m the only one there, and I don’t have to deal with anyone else’s sounds or smells, let alone anyone angling for tampon chat or assistance with their undergarments.

I’d love it if they made silent hand dryers.

Thanks @EmpressDomesticatednottamed it was all quite surreal in v posh hotel 🤷‍♀️. Me and a couple of colleagues questioned ourselves as to whether it was actually real (a few drinks had been taken). We realised it was and reported it to reception and turned out it was a hotel worker. Just vile.

And no, never been asked for any sanitary products in a loo…..

So… they are or they aren’t trans?

And… they do or they don’t use women’s toilets?

Is the trolling just that nobody else thinks these thoughts, or just that nobody else posts these thoughts?

I'm sorry, you're suggesting we shouldn't believe men who say they are women? Are you saying they make stuff up?

So… they’re not trans?

If it’s plausible, then it’s not trolling.

Errr…. Clean, with no shit on the floor?

Im obviously more easily pleased than others

I've never been arrested, seen a badger in the wild or visited Australia. What's your point?

Lots of posters jumped in to share their experiences though, didn’t they?

I went to the loos in the royal opera house once. Very fancy but the queue was huge.

So that would be ... hoax gender?
How would we know? Do they come with signs?

According to the comments, the same poster has made multiple dodgy posts to the subreddit, claiming to be cis in some and trans in others. Obviously they are not a genuine poster.

As for why they are trolling - maybe they are a chaser, maybe they are a transphobe, maybe they just like causing trouble, maybe they're trying to manufacture evidence. Who knows.

Is the trolling just that nobody else thinks these thoughts, or just that nobody else posts these thoughts?

So from this I take it that you're determined to continue to assume that despite this poster obviously being a troll that their comments are still representative of trans people and carry on as though they were genuine. Thanks for verifying that confirmation bias is more important to you than fact, I guess.

It looks like the thread has been removed now.

I didn’t get to see how it wound up, but the first 28 responses from the trans community, the ones there when I saw it, took it all quite seriously. Even if the original poster was a wind up not one of those 28 people in that community were surprised or shocked to hear the poster’s thoughts.

If it’s plausible, then it’s not trolling.

"As long as I believe it, then it's not a lie."

Listen to yourself.

I've never done one of the intrusive tampony things, not even with my sister or mother or good friend...

What I have done is go in to escape creepy blokes in a pub or club...

Or, in other words, let me explain how I am not a woman without using those exact words. Aaand...post! (Idiot)