Inside the mind of a non-binary woman

[RogueFemale]

This article popped up on Apple news this morning. A first person account of a woman's experience of feeling she is 'trans' / 'nonbinary'.

It starts off with her saying: "When my date used my correct pronouns, I felt a sudden surge of happiness. ... It was then that I realised how little my identity had been affirmed in my previous relationships with cis men, and how this simple act, which should be the bare minimum, felt monumental."

It was a startling insight into how these people depend so much on someone else's validation and others saying the right words (in this woman's case, "they/them") to support their fragile sense of self. (It's also unclear how pronouns would come up during a one-to-one date).

Anyway, just sharing because it's an honest and revealing account of this woman's mental state.

She's with a trans-identifying-woman now, and seems happy. Well, sort of. "Now, every intimate movement encompasses our transness, whether it’s a ‘no-chest’ day, or a day I feel most comfortable being intimate with a binder on."

It seems like a very roundabout way of being two lesbians.

metro.co.uk/2026/05/12/sex-a-fellow-trans-person-put-off-cis-men-life-3-28322552/

This article is deeply, deeply wanky. But I tried.

That'll be because you are non-binary! Ta daaa!

Bloody hell - the regressive reversion to "pink & blue" aisles in Mothercare etc in the 00's have a lot to answer for!

Absolutely.

It's both a power play and a means to launder any other "privilege" someone might have - particularly handy for any "cis-white-heteronormative" etc members of the professional managerial classes and their ilk.

Privilege Laundering is a brilliant concept (and bang on the money!)

When I first joined MN there were often posts about indigo children, I'm guessing they're all trans now, with the same indulgent idiot parents.

I've been explaining how my trans son and I navigate the world, and you reply with some weird fantasy about an adult being among kids?!

Why are you equating being a trans boy to paeodophilia?! That's...okay, I feel sick, I don't know why any sane person would write all that.

How do I know whether someone is genuinely trans or just cosplaying trans?

Find a therapist to hold your trauma for you. And remember it’s not about the actions that are done on you, it’s about the internal cognition of the other.

Please point to the bit about paedophilia? I think I missed it.

I'm assuming there is some text I've missed, and you weren't aiming for a histrionic DARVO attempt.

You're the one who keeps using Volkmar Sigusch's terminology, no idea why you'd do that unless you're cool with his theology ideology.

Article, with two direct quotations. You either want this stuff legitimised or you don't.

https://grokipedia.com/page/Volkmar_Sigusch

sexologists including Sigusch, framed consensual adult-child sexuality as potentially liberating

and

Sigusch's 1991 introduction of "cissexual" (later anglicized to "cisgender") to denote non-transsexual identities

I did warn that poster about this days ago but got ignored. I think it’s awful someone would willingly use language coined by pedophile apologists, especially as that word also remind all trans people thst they will never be what they wish to be. It’s a double whammy of problematic

The whole point of being a Flerbit is that no one knows what it means except Flerbits.
And Flerbits can self-identify and change the parameters of Flerbitry at will.
So it has nothing to do with 8 year olds. Unless it does.
Flerbitry is therefore a rather ill-thought out religion, which is why it correlates with trans ideology.

I can't say I thought any part of Heretic's post had anything to do with pedophile fantasies, but you do you, as they say.

In case you missed the point, it was an analogy, which is a comparison of two things that have similarities. Hope that helps.

I've been explaining how my trans son and I navigate the world

She's a girl. HTH

I do wonder whether that poster's daughter, realising that she will always be viewed by her mother as falling short of what was hoped for by being female, is now trolling her with the trans stuff, and getting on with her own life in private.

Hope so.

I agree with @Imdunfer, I commend your ability to stay calm and continue to engage on this thread @TransParentlyAnnoyed. I disagree with many of your views (I'm on the GC end of things), but I'm someone that likes to have open conversations and find out why people who think differently to me think that way.

I'm intrigued that you're GNC and have a transboy /AFAB child. I'm not at all girly myself so when I brought my 2 daughters up I was also surprised (upset a little??) they gravitated towards pink! Not my thing at all. Now my eldest is a teenager and it's all baggy clothes so it all changes!

When your child was 11 and told you they were trans, was there any kind of trigger you could see? I guess it happened in year 6 or year 7? It sounds like they've had a tough time since then. How are they doing now?

My friend's daughter age 5 developed a trans identity and they socially transitioned to use male pronouns and name etc. Now they're 10 and are now non binary and use they them pronouns. Is that something you can see might happen with your youngest DC?

LMFAO at non binary WOMAN. They cant even keep their own labels straight

Equating trans children being respected to a weird fantasy about adults joining under-8 activities is beyond weird. It's perverted.

Okay the number of people on here who think it's normal to discuss kids like that is alarming me now.

Nice DARVO though. I'm almost impressed, except that every time I've asked people not to talk about children's genitals on here, they imply I'm a paedo. Christ it's unsettling. I feel quite afraid, and unsettled by it.

Anyway, off out now because the respite carers are here. I hope the l decent lurkers and nicer people in this forum will understand I don't fancy coming back to this thread.

Feel free to claim victory, I honestly don't care. I am highly wary of anyone that tolerates talking in sexual terms about kids.

Laters netters. Thank you to those who replied in good faith and just disagreed, I appreciated that.

The rest...brrr.

Then why the fuck do you admire and act out Sigusch's theoretical construct?

Narrator, for the lurkers: the only person mentioning children's genitals was @TransParentlyAnnoyed .

The only person who ascribed a sexual motive to Hellebore's post was ... @TransParentlyAnnoyed

The person who responded to the mention of DARVO by reversing and accusing DARVO in return was... Well, we can all read.

And can speculate on motivations.

This poster talks about children's genitals a lot. So far, I think he's up to 9 or 10 posts.

Paedophilia? Don't be so silly.

I was equating somebody claiming to have a right to engage in things designed for an age group they don't belong to with somebody claiming a right to engage in things designed for a sex class they don't belong to and on exactly the same reasoning you have presented. I could equally have picked race or any other objectively verifiable category but age is often most analogous to sex in that it is measurable and categorical.

Please feel free to engage with the actual argument and explain where you consider my logic falls down.

Christ it's unsettling. I feel quite afraid, and unsettled by it.

weird as fuck