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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Looking for a gym with female-only changing rooms by sex: a journey

330 replies

2021x · 11/05/2026 00:16

I am trying to find a gym in my city (not UK) that excludes males from the female showering and changing rooms.

I was in my gym and there was a man in the changing room- no attempt to be female other than a sports-bra- and since then I was just stressed everytime I went.

I have emailed a gym who say they are trans-inclusive on a case by case basis and said I should use the accessiblity changing room if I am uncomfortable.

I have also put up a post on Reddit in the local page - that got auto-moderated, and then the same post on the national page that is going through normal moderation.

My post says this

I am looking for XXXX gyms that have female‑only changing and shower areas that are restricted by sex, not self‑identified gender.

I’m comfortable sharing these spaces with other females, but I’m not comfortable changing or showering in areas where males may be present.

If you know of any gyms in XXXX please sent me a direct message.

Wish me luck.

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Keeptoiletssafe · 15/05/2026 13:12

onepostwonder · 14/05/2026 22:29

A clarification is a minor edit, specifying clarity. The new revision is an entire rewrite.

You don’t listen to what I have been telling you. If you look at UK (I don’t know which country you are from) building control, regulations and legislation, words such as women, men, separate sex, single sex, unisex, universal, are stated many, many times. It changes design if you don’t conform to proper definitions. We have had these definitions confirmed. We have had the legalities confirmed. Single sex spaces are single sex spaces.

MyAmpleSheep · 15/05/2026 13:51

onepostwonder · 14/05/2026 22:29

A clarification is a minor edit, specifying clarity. The new revision is an entire rewrite.

A clarifiation is a clarification. If the original interpretation is close to correct then a clarification is a minor change. If people's original interpretation is 180° wrong then the results of the clarification can be severe. It's still a clarification.

2021x · 17/05/2026 02:02

UPDATE.

I kept getting the same response which was "case by case basis". I looked into it futher and the Human Rights Commission has said that this is the preferred response to avoid a discrimination suit.

So I have sent the below email (AI aided)

I am writing to raise concerns about the lack of gym facilities in XXXX that provide female‑only changing rooms based on sex. I have been unable to find a gym that can guarantee that only females will be present in the female changing area, and this has significantly affected my ability to safely access exercise facilities.

In November 2024, while using the XXX (gym), a male individual entered the female changing room while I was undressing. My immediate response was to freeze, and I felt genuinely scared. The individual stood directly behind me to change, despite the availability of space elsewhere in the room. After this incident, I reviewed (gym) publicly available policies and found no indication that males would be permitted to enter the female changing room. I contacted the gym for clarification, and their response is attached.

I asked (gym) to notify female members that males may be permitted to use the female changing room so that women could make informed decisions about their privacy and safety. No such communication was provided. As a result, I became increasingly distressed when attending the gym and ultimately cancelled my membership this year.

My personal experiences — both in public settings and in my professional work in healthcare — have taught me that sex‑based boundaries exist for important reasons, including privacy, dignity, and safety. These experiences mean that access to a female‑only space is essential for me to feel safe when removing my clothing, particularly underwear.

Since leaving (gym), I have contacted several other gyms inXXX. All have provided similar responses: that access to changing rooms is determined by gender identity rather than sex, assessed on a case‑by‑case basis. In practice, this means there is no consistent or predictable standard for who may be present in the female changing room at any given time. This places the responsibility for managing risk onto individual women, while also exposing gyms to potential liability if an incident such as an assault or privacy breach were to occur. Because of this approach, I cannot access a gym that provides a reliably female‑only changing space. I believe this amounts to indirect discrimination, as a policy that appears neutral in theory disproportionately disadvantages women like me who, for safety, privacy, or trauma‑related reasons, cannot undress in front of males.

From my research, it appears that many gyms are relying on advice from the Human Rights Commission, which suggests that to avoid discrimination they should allow access to facilities based on gender identity. However, this advice does not consider the importance of sex‑based boundaries for women’s privacy and safety, nor does it consider the rights of female gym members to bodily privacy and informed consent. It also places males who use female facilities at risk of being accused of exposure or inappropriate behaviour in situations where they may simply be changing.

I am requesting clarity on how this issue is being interpreted, and whether guidance can be updated to ensure that service providers can offer sex‑based facilities without fear of breaching discrimination law. Women should not be placed in a position where they must choose between their personal safety and their ability to access a gym.

I would appreciate your advice on how this matter can be addressed so that women in XXXX can access female‑only changing rooms without distress or risk.

I have also sent an abridge copy to my local MP - who unfortunately campainged on gender identity overruling sex - and CC the minister trying to bring a bill to establish definitions of sex.

My plan is to wait for 20 working days and follow up, then if not reply 10 working days, 5 working days etc..

OP posts:
ProfessorBinturong · 17/05/2026 02:08

Case-by-case is routinely misapplied. In the legislation it means setting-by-setting or situation-by-situation (Should the changing rooms be single sex?), not person-by-person (Should Keith be allowed into the women's changing room?).

2021x · 17/05/2026 02:12

ProfessorBinturong · 17/05/2026 02:08

Case-by-case is routinely misapplied. In the legislation it means setting-by-setting or situation-by-situation (Should the changing rooms be single sex?), not person-by-person (Should Keith be allowed into the women's changing room?).

Thats an interesting point thank you- I will check with people who know the legislation where I am at.

I was trying to say that gyms are not equipped with the skill to assess whether a male is a risk to females. This is part of a pattern where on big societal issues the risk and onus is being delgated to individuals rather than government policy makers. which in this case is causes harm to women.

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