Daughter in early 20s lonely due to GC views

[Currentquandry]

My daughter is in her early twenties. She is GC and is struggling because so few of her peers have similar opinions. She is very lonely because of this. Are there any online groups she could join to give her a sense of community? She is also ND. Thank you in advance for your advice…

'if all they're doing is having a shower and getting dressed, then what's the damn problem?'

They might disagree with the meaning of words but then the words would have different meanings.

You could have the opinion that apples are bananas but that would pretty much be the same level of meaningless nonsense.

Would the women who want to exclude the white woman in your example change their minds if she told them she identified as black?

Because white women are not less racist than their male counterparts. Also, there may be issues that BAME women feel uncomfortable about discussing around white women for a range of reasons.

I think you should reflect on why you feel this woman needs to be centred in this way. I'm not surprised you feel like that, many do. It's arguably problematic though.

What a load of old bollocks. Of course none of you will explain it as you don’t have a coherent argument for it. See the post above yours as to why your example doesn’t work.

Well, sure, they can hold whatever views they like, but the law doesnt support genderist definitions. The law is very clear.

So what’s your opinion on Rachel Dolezal? Or is that another question you want to swerve?

See, there is already a group of people that in some sense, are comparable. White Caribbeans, specifically. Take white Jamaicans. They're more culturally Jamaican than many 2nd gen British born Jamaicans. They've been raised in a predominantly Black Country, with a dominant Black culture. Still, they are white.

I personally think that the type of BAME event i described earlier should definitely be inclusive of people from this demographic. I was surprised that anyone would feel differently.

She seems mentally ill. There are white people I know who I'd have no issue with being in a position of power in a non-white organisation because they really know the people they want to represent. They live among them in various ways. But none of those people would say they are Black. I know there are Black people who disagree and "get" her, though. Their opinion is as valid as mine.

Do you think it’s wrong for a white person to identify as black?

Yes. I do. But my opinion is one Black person's opinion that may or may not be in the majority. That's my point, trying to find out my personal views is pretty irrelevant. All Black people are entitled to an opinion on this. Just like all women are have an equally valid opinion about trans women. Whether or not that opinion is shared by the majority of other women is another matter which might dictate how it plays out in areas like law. Or indeed, who is invited to an event.

Someone disagreeing with me doesnt invalidate their opinion.

You're so hoping for a "gotcha" here off the poster, aren't you 😁
Some people don't have an issue with trans women in public spaces (which a lot do, even trans women taking a photo of themselves out for a day out in a shopping centre I've seen people getting angry about)
Why is that so hard to understand?
Not everyone thinks it's wrong for trans people to identify as the opposite sex.

Which bit would they disagree with that could be valid though?

No one can disagree that including male people in a female space makes it mixed sex, that’s just a fact.

So what is the valid point of disagreement?

Yes, thanks Cornish.

"But ultimately, I believe that the right of trans women to have a space to shower / pee / get changed is greater than the right of non-trans women to be protected from the occasional sight of a penis."

And it's not "The occasional sight of a penis" that women are concerned about. It's the presence of male people.

The thought terminating cliche that "all opinions are valid" is what has got us into this mess. Society functions (or used to) on the basis of following the law and the commonly agreed social contract. Whether we like it or not, there are laws that guide how we drive, how we keep children safe, that we don't steal etc etc.... Enabling women's safety from predatory men and enabling women into the work & public space is why single sex spaces evolved - in the UK and the world over.

The regressive notion that women's safety no longer matters or that children no longer need safeguarding is spouted by all sorts of people operating under the delusion that "all opinions are valid" . We see daily how the regressive porn addicts & rape apologists have no hesitation in showcasing their violent predatory beliefs because they think their opinions that women need raping as a punishment are valid.

There should be no place in the public domain for those espousing those opinions. If you're an outlier who dismisses the legal rights of women and girls to single sex spaces then you should expect challenge and criticism from the rest of society who understands that these are important for the functioning of a safe society.

At what point would you become concerned about those opinions influencing behaviour, rights and legislation? I know you can't and don't speak for the black community, and I know at this stage it's hypothetical, but do you have a sense of the point at which white people choosing to identify as black to gain access to black-only spaces would elicit pushback from the wider black community?

It isn't "just a fact". There is a very obvious difference between a woman's space in which there may occasionally be a trans woman, and a space which is wholly mixed sex, ie everyone uses it, men are in and out all the time. Again, it is an act of GC pretense to pretend there is no difference when there obviously is. Many many women who would be uncomfortable with the latter are fine with the former.

I think you need to learn the difference between fact and opinion. Even if you really strongly believe something, it doesnt make it a fact.

Earlier a poster gave their opinion on what risks they think are more of a priority based on their perception of risk. That is a subjective measurement that informs their opinion.

Others disagreed, based on their own subjective risk perception.

Assuming all people involved are women, all opinions are equally valid.

I've worked somewhere similar to this, and the local black people had VERY strong feelings about local white people (who, as you say, had same/similar heritage) being in any positions of power.

Its 100% as the Supreme Court explained it

'There is a very obvious difference between a woman's space in which there may occasionally be a trans woman, and a space which is wholly mixed sex, ie everyone uses it, men are in and out all the time'

The degree of cock? Penis frequency?

The difference is in expectation. A mixed sex space is easy to understand. A space that is labelled as.women only but may sometimes include men is misleading.

Because white women are not less racist than their male counterparts.

So you’re accusing general white women (and men) of being racist to justify excluding her from being involved in the organisation of an event that wanted to use her expensive equipment. Ok.

Is she a racist?

And how is asking to be involved in the organisation of an event that wants to use her equipment ‘centring’ herself?

This wasnt so much about working as who was invited to the event.

Did you discuss white people raised in predominantly Black countries/cultures, specifically?

Maybe we're back in that Humpty Dumpty territory? " When I use a word,' Humpty Dumpty said in a rather scornful tone 'it means just what I choose it to mean — neither more nor less."