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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

A UK forum is encouraging a desperate parent of a trans identified male to seek out DIY hormones, without consulting health care professionals, how is this dangerous advice legal?

1000 replies

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 09:52

OP "If anyone could help me to understand, I would be extremely grateful. I just want my daughter to be alive and happy in her own skin as much as possible ."

Responses: "diy is reliable and safe, there are communities that will be able to help, and really all it is getting a blood test every now and then to check how low or high a couple numbers are and adjusting accordingly."

Full details here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/transgenderUK/comments/1rw0bac/please_help_parent_to_a_16_year_old/

How is this even slightly legal? The pro anorexia sites were shut down right? The pro suicide?

OP posts:
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Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:36

OpheliaWitchoftheWoods · 17/03/2026 16:34

I feel compelled to mention that there is another MN regular who is a man who has passed through surgery and medication history as part of gender distress, and the story radically shifts, frequently, between being fine and having no problems and being happy, to descriptions of severe and distressing medical issues and unhappiness. Miranda Yardley's essays about his surgeries and the psychological impacts he experienced over time are well worth reading.

Could you link to some of those, please. I'd be interested to read. Haven't heard from MY in ages.

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:36

likelysuspect · 17/03/2026 16:34

Thats because the health professions get things wrong sometimes

This is an example of it

I'll take the word of my health care providers over mumsnet experts.

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:37

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:35

Trans people exist. Trans people have socially and medically adapted their lives throughout history. They are not going to disappear because a minority of obsessed individuals with some temporary legal reinforcement declare them to not exist.

People exist. They are either male or female. 'Trans' is a concept; a framing device for feelings...not an indicator of a material or measurable reality.

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:38

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:36

I'll take the word of my health care providers over mumsnet experts.

I'm sure you do. Affirmation is what your existence as a 'trans person' depends on.

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:39

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:39

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:37

People exist. They are either male or female. 'Trans' is a concept; a framing device for feelings...not an indicator of a material or measurable reality.

Edited

Lives experienced are only concepts to those who constrain their beliefs and are unwilling to allow for material reality of others.

yoursweetpotatoesarebland · 17/03/2026 16:39

🙋‍♀️ another one walking in the shoes you walk. There is another way. I understand how terrifying it is I really do. I was getting calls from school saying my daughter was feeling suicidal.

she is unrecognisable now- horse riding, doing gold d of e, predicted great marks in her a levels, has a part time job. She loves me and values my opinion, our relationship is actually better now. I got so much good advice from here and Bayswater group. I wouldn’t say she’s over it yet but she’s so much better and has no desire to make any changes to herself.
A lot of things you see on the trans groups are not true, please look at the evidence. There is no emergency, nothing is going to happen right now so take stock and think carefully. Respond don’t react. I am happy to talk if you want to.

CassOle · 17/03/2026 16:39

I feel that I should mention 'egg cracking'. The poster who has the post on Reddit that is being discussed should definitely look into this. Men will target vulnerable boys and men to 'crack their eggs'. It is dark and nefarious.

Richie Herron (a detransitioner) has discussed this in relation to his own history.

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:40

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:39

Lives experienced are only concepts to those who constrain their beliefs and are unwilling to allow for material reality of others.

Nobody doubts that you exist.

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:41

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:38

I'm sure you do. Affirmation is what your existence as a 'trans person' depends on.

Your beliefs require you to relabel experience and impose actions where none exist.

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:42

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:40

Nobody doubts that you exist.

Please stop engaging with this person :)

OP posts:
OldCrone · 17/03/2026 16:42

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:10

I transitioned as a teen in the 80s. I've been on HRT for over 40 years, yawn. I don't know how long I'll be on them in the future, but my health is quite fine. My sex life has been fine, thank you. I do not have biological children, but I do have children.

Trans children exist. Trans children are people. "Trans Ideology" is a creation of religious conservatives and others who are marginalised by society whenever they direct their obsessions toward actual people.

Edited

Children weren't being given puberty blockers or cross sex hormones in the 80s. Your situation is not comparable to @FlumpyLump's child.

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:43

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 09:52

OP "If anyone could help me to understand, I would be extremely grateful. I just want my daughter to be alive and happy in her own skin as much as possible ."

Responses: "diy is reliable and safe, there are communities that will be able to help, and really all it is getting a blood test every now and then to check how low or high a couple numbers are and adjusting accordingly."

Full details here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/transgenderUK/comments/1rw0bac/please_help_parent_to_a_16_year_old/

How is this even slightly legal? The pro anorexia sites were shut down right? The pro suicide?

The reddit post has been removed:

"[ Removed by moderator "

OP posts:
SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:44

OldCrone · 17/03/2026 16:42

Children weren't being given puberty blockers or cross sex hormones in the 80s. Your situation is not comparable to @FlumpyLump's child.

Edited

I don't disagree with you but please don't engage with this poster

OP posts:
onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:44

OldCrone · 17/03/2026 16:42

Children weren't being given puberty blockers or cross sex hormones in the 80s. Your situation is not comparable to @FlumpyLump's child.

Edited

This is true, but no one has mentioned puberty blockers. I went straight on to oestrogen, which reduced my testosterone to a negligible level on its own.

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:46

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:41

Your beliefs require you to relabel experience and impose actions where none exist.

Sex is a reality; a measurable reality the world over, and across species; one that differentiates males from females. This is not a "belief".

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:46

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:46

Sex is a reality; a measurable reality the world over, and across species; one that differentiates males from females. This is not a "belief".

please, PLEASE stop engaging with this poster

OP posts:
likelysuspect · 17/03/2026 16:47

CassOle · 17/03/2026 16:39

I feel that I should mention 'egg cracking'. The poster who has the post on Reddit that is being discussed should definitely look into this. Men will target vulnerable boys and men to 'crack their eggs'. It is dark and nefarious.

Richie Herron (a detransitioner) has discussed this in relation to his own history.

What does this mean

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:47

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:42

Please stop engaging with this person :)

Please stop telling other people when to engage.

The mother in question did not start this thread. You did.

InSlovakiaTheCapitalOfCourseIsBratislava · 17/03/2026 16:49

FranticFrankie · 17/03/2026 16:18

I heartily wish the aforementioned poster would stick to their user name

should be one trick pony

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

onepostwonder · 17/03/2026 16:50

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:46

Sex is a reality; a measurable reality the world over, and across species; one that differentiates males from females. This is not a "belief".

As human beings, our sex is manifested ane experienced as gender. I haven't had an interpersonal interaction in decades where the gametes I may have provided to a relationship at some point were the focus. This is not a "belief."

RedToothBrush · 17/03/2026 16:51

There's a lot of parents of children who identify as trans here.

Many, with support, have desisted. Indeed the Cass Report itself says if they don't get hormones and aren't affirmed most will desist and be happy.

This is evidenced.

What's not evidenced is how effective drugs are. Indeed as more research comes out it suggests the opposite and a lifetime of medication. DIY makes a child a drug dependent at an early age - something they may then have to pay for, for the rest of their life because when they hit adult services they have a problem because they still have to go through the process of being assessed etc in order to get anything on the NHS and there's no guarantee these drugs will be on the NHS for much longer.

So you are then a drug addict misusing drugs which has been enabled and with all the associated costs.

Plus they can't change sex and will never be able to change sex which will bring a whole load of issues in its own right.

Transing away the gay will solve nothing. At best it just kicks the can down the road of when problems will emerge.

OpheliaWitchoftheWoods · 17/03/2026 16:51

Shortshriftandlethal · 17/03/2026 16:36

Could you link to some of those, please. I'd be interested to read. Haven't heard from MY in ages.

https://mirandayardley.com/en/a-miranda-yardley-reader/

A Miranda Yardley Reader - Miranda Yardley

I had begun to annoy the extremists of trans Twitter with a piece I published in July 2014...

https://mirandayardley.com/en/a-miranda-yardley-reader/

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 17/03/2026 16:53

likelysuspect · 17/03/2026 16:47

What does this mean

“Egg cracking” is internet slang from trans culture. An “egg” means someone who is said to be trans but has not realised or accepted it yet, and to “crack someone’s egg” means pushing them towards that conclusion. Even sources sympathetic to the term note that applying it to a real person is precarious, because it means treating somebody else’s identity as already settled before they have worked it out for themselves.

The problem, in plain English, is that it can become a form of suggestion and social pressure. In practice, critics use “egg cracking” to describe older people, often men in online spaces, spotting a younger or vulnerable person who is unhappy, isolated, autistic, gay, depressed, uncomfortable with puberty, or simply not fitting in, and reframing all of that as proof that they are “really trans”. Instead of helping the person think carefully, it can encourage a one-way interpretation where ordinary distress, sexuality issues, body discomfort, or mental health problems are all funnelled into a single identity narrative. That is exactly why many parents and detransitioners see it as manipulative rather than supportive. The term itself literally includes the idea of causing someone to realise they are trans, not just neutrally listening to them.

Ritchie Herron’s account is often cited here. Herron has said that, when he was struggling with serious mental health issues, strangers online told him he “must be trans”, and that this fed into a pathway where, in his view, clinicians failed to properly explore his underlying problems before medical transition. Reports on his case say he believed depression, anxiety, OCD and other difficulties were not adequately addressed, and that he later came to see transition as a grave mistake. Whether people agree with every conclusion he draws or not, his story is a clear example of the concern: vulnerable people can be nudged by confident outsiders into seeing “trans” as the answer before other explanations have been properly examined.

FYI this happened to my own son effectively.

AllSorts, the Brighton Charity were to blame.

OP posts:
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