The Bluestocking: All You Need to Know About Risk Assessments, Jazz Hands, Battenberg and Sourdough (But Were Afraid to Ask) - and gerbils. Lots and lots of gerbils.

[MyrtleLion]

Welcome to The Bluestocking, the perfectly overblown, gloriously chaotic all-women’s pub where you can have a bit of a lie down if you need it.

Expect serious debates on musicals, cake and knitting, and whimsical musings on women’s rights and why the world’s on fire (again), all under the calm supervision of our support staff: gerbils, capybaras, and the occasional quokka on secondment.

The alcohol won’t get you drunk, the pastries won’t make you fat, but the conversation will digress, and that’s the point.

Remember to namechange before posting if you’re sometimes someone else.

My local garden centre has a huge clear bauble lined on the inside with tiny flat sequins in many tasteful colours. It was a struggle to walk away without one, but the price helped.

I really, really don't need any more decorations, but. I used to buy a different style of bird decoration every year: one year it was a dove with 'Peace' under it - from the Tank Museum. 😂

My pelargoniums are all safely in the garage, though I have a red dragon persicaria which needs to go on its winter holidays soon.

I excelled myself yesterday, cutting up tons of veg to do far too many Mediterranean roasted vegetables for dinner (DH likes them cold for lunch later in the week) & at the same time preparing veg (including the leftover bits that were too small for the oven) to make soup this lunchtime, which I have to say was bloody delicious. Can't quite work out what's different, but it had lots of fresh ginger & the soft central bits of the celery along with whatever was lurking in the fridge. I'm not usually this organised, & leave a lot of it to DH. My dodgy knees are a great excuse, but basically it's just laziness.

Every year I buy a tree decoration for each of my grandchildren. DGS (9) has a shiny pizza slice this year, because he loves pizza so much. I hope, when he's grown up, it will remind him of both me and his pizza love.

Perfect use of a small children. You've been reading my book, haven't you?

I have indeed, Fuzzy. Fascinating reading!

My local garden centre has a huge clear bauble lined on the inside with tiny flat sequins in many tasteful colours. It was a struggle to walk away without one, but the price helped.

Sticking sequins closely together on the inside of something spherical, even if it does come apart into two hemispheres, must be quite labour intensive. The sort of thing which you’d charge a lot for, or do for yourself while you were listening to a good radio programme.

Tonight’s episode of The Verb on BBC R4 would be an example. Alistair McGowan read one of his own poems about how words associated with people, such as who, are being replaced by ones which are not, like what and that. The more poetic among us could write a similar one about how other words are being replaced.

Radio 4 is the craftperson's station, isn't it? It's weird what sort of things you can be interested in while doing something that's repetitious. I'll try 'The Verb' & give you in exchange 'Cautionary Tales' which has just done a 2-parter on a US version of the 'Masquerade' treasure hunt. It has some interesting stuff on plane crashes, too, if you're in the mood for that sort of thing.

Oh, I hate it when someone says/writes 'people that' or, even worse, 'people which'. It's so dehumanising - how do they not hear it? Is it a defence against getting who/whom wrong?

😁😁

If I plant a small child, will it flower in the spring?

Yes, it really is. I catch all sorts of fascinating things on R4 which I didn’t know I was interested in. It’s also possible to listen to it just for a few minutes and, apart from the plays, enjoy that short time.

I’ll look out Cautionary Tales. I think I have heard some episodes before, but not ones on Masquerade.

The Verb used to be on BBC R3. I started listening to it there because it’s presented by Ian McMillan: I used to follow him on Twitter before Elon Musk bought it.

I have still to eat a packet of Christmas biscuits I bought last Christmas. They are currently a month out of date though!

ETA: I meant to say as well I could eat a mince pie right now. With brandy butter and brandy cream

That's a common misconception. Planting a small child is completely contraindicated because it will just dig itself up and follow you indoors, where it will complain loudly and vociferously about being muddy. Or possibly enjoy being muddy and drop mud everywhere, while complaining loudly and vociferously about your attempts to clean it.

Better eat them up quickly, before they notice!

You can't beat a novelty Christmas decoration.

No. It will rot annoyingly and smell.

I'm sure you cover the topic in detail in your parenting book, Fuzzy😄

I like all the washing powder adverts..." Keep away from children".
Great advice there.

You could loan out the more annoying ones of yours, bit like library books but for longer.

Oh happy memories. Mother would make sure I was clean and dressed ready for dear PaPa to arrive home from work.

Two minutes later he'd arrive home to find me naked and wallowing in a patch of mud!

Excellent idea! I will suggest it in the office tomorrow!

I have been heard to comment "I try..."

I came across two labels today - one says
PLEASE DO NOT BEND
and the other says
AVOID CONTACT WITH LIGHT COLOURED GARMENTS
so here I am, obediently standing upright, dressed in black from head to toe...

though the absence of a hyphen suggests that it's only garments made from photosensitive material that I need to avoid contact with😁

Doesn't that put a bit of a crimp on getting anything done, Marie?

Yeah, great excuse, innit?😁

It's an excellent excuse! And I admire your caution with the second one - as you point out, it probably does just mean photosensitive garments, but it's better to be safe than sorry.