Please help: going into school (secondary) to talk about PSHE provision, given Just Like Us are coming in to give a talk on LGBTQ+ relationships

[CyanExpert]

Requesting help from the impressive FWR hive mind. Any advice on how to frame a discussion on PSHE provision at DC secondary school. Just Like Us are coming in to give a talk on LGBTQ+ relationships. I want to lodge a point that KCSIE seems to now say gender questioning (not trans) for kids and isn't LGB sexual orientation different from T identity? What about different perspectives eg LGB Alliance or Sex Matters - why just one point of view? I tend to be very fact driven and am looking for wording advice on how to sound less confrontational and more 'having a discussion'.

locate school complaints policy and read it carefully- you need to follow this.

Email to head and potentially head of pshe quoting relevant parts of kcsie and also the new RSHE guidelines.

theres also a document about external providers - posting on the hop so can add more in a bit

Head needs to be able to say what just like us are going to say with confidence.

it shouldn’t go ahead if they can’t but they may be a bit clueless and you’ll have to spell it out

Safeguarding lens: KCSIE makes clear that “gender questioning” children should not automatically be treated as “trans.” Safeguarding must come before affirmation.
Clarity: Sexual orientation (LGB) is about who you are attracted to. “T” is about identity. They are different categories and should not be blurred together.
Balance: Why has the school chosen Just Like Us only? Could other perspectives be included (e.g. LGB Alliance, Sex Matters) to ensure pupils see the full range of views?
Single-sex rights: How will the session acknowledge girls’ rights to single-sex spaces and sports under the Equality Act 2010?
Neutrality: The DfE requires political impartiality. Presenting only one contested viewpoint risks breaching that duty.
Safeguarding checks: Has the school checked the materials in advance to ensure they are age-appropriate, factually accurate, and not encouraging secrecy from parents?

Facts. Not opinions. As you very rightly say.

Page 56 KCSIE

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/68add931969253904d155860/Keeping_children_safe_in_education_from_1_September_2025.pdf

Helpful structure, thank you. I need to go in with a few clear points to lodge in mind, and not get bogged down in any sort of trans-right-or-wrong debate (even if I have views on this!).

Using external agencies

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/68add931969253904d155860/Keeping_children_safe_in_education_from_1_September_2025.pdf

Follow up slightly ridiculous question - should I say KCSIE by spelling it out letter by letter, or "Kicksie" as though saying the acronym? want to sound like I know what I'm talking about!

Iirc this new document that came out last week mentions political impartiality and balance. Unfortunately as it also follows EA, it does use the term LGBT regarding adults.

it does however link via hyperlink to Cass and mentions FWS ruling.

so I’d consider carefully whether you refer to it. And how.

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/68baa90ab0a373a01819fe9c/RelationshipsandSexEducationEqualityImpactAssessment-2025.pdf

Refer to first as Keeping Children Safe in Education 2025, thereafter KCSIE or KCSiE 2025

RSHE statutory guidelines

worth also seeking out sections that mention balance and impartiality. Note who they do and don’t link to in the doc.

Just like us is not supported by Government as some initiatives are in other areas. Eg read write ink.

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/68b8499e11b4ded2da19fd92/Relationships_education__relationships_and_sex_education_and_health_education_-_statutory_guidance.pdf

Good luck with this. Just Like Us are truly awful.

Verbally? Say Kicksie.

Kicksie. (I work in safeguarding)

Sorry I thought you meant in the letter! Posting on the hop…

I think in the first instance, and even more, I’d still say the whole document name out loud, highlighting the 2025

This is correct for written things. But in conversation i normally hear people say the words though the last two are often left off. (keeping children safe.) or just "the guidance." If the other person says kicksie or similar then copy them but I am not sure it's common. Probably highly site/team specific.

Good grief. Supreme. Court. Ruling.

Is the head illiterate, unable to comprehend the end of Stonewall rule, and the end of giving them money and the end of giving them access to children?

Maybe a kindly person who can read, could produce a spoken version of the vital legal information, presented in short words, and short sentences, suiting perhaps the mental age of the head?.

meeting in school id make a point of writing down notes and re reading them back to them to clarify.

I’d personally prefer emails simply as you can make sure points are got across, guidelines are quoted, questions are answered and chase the unanswered ones.

Clarity: Sexual orientation (LGB) is about who you are attracted to. “T” is about identity. They are different categories and should not be blurred together.

Thank you for making this really important point, SingleSexSpacesInSchools.
LGB and TQ+++ are different groups of people with different identities and different issues, and as you say, should not be lumped together.
Hence the LGB✂T campaign.

Best of luck with your talk OP. Keep it strong and matter-of-fact.
' I tend to be very fact driven' isn't necessarily a bad thing, and needn't come across as confrontational. It's a plus point that you are the one with the facts - and, increasingly, public opinion - on your side. Presenting them calmly and neutrally, as ...well, facts, puts it up to the other side to refute them, or come across as reality-lite.

Try not to get drawn into debates about things, don't react to emotive red rag phrases like 'toxic culture wars' 'transphobia' 'be kind'' 'it's complicated', just keep to the facts.
Keep a cool 'That's as may be BUT this is what the facts are....' attitude, as much as you can.

Good luck!!

Thanks for the advice. Will struggle to keep cool but will do my best!

If at all possible, I’d keep this to formal
emails, not a meeting and a chat.

youw ant what they say to be on record and unequivocable. There is no benefit to you to a face to face meeting.

This is really interesting point. I thought I'd start with an informal chat to try to get the lay-of-the-land in terms of the schools perspective, and to lay out what I think. I thought I would then follow up with an email laying out what I discussed and points I made, and if necessary asking for answers/clarification. I thought it would be less confrontational and more 'working with the school' to start like this. But I see your point on formal emails that can be kept and responses recorded if it needs to be escalated.

You do what you need to do of course, and I understand why you might want to keep the school sweet. However. Either, they have an answer for everything you want to mention, and it's acceptable, keeps children safe, is within the various rules - in which case they don't mind you asking, via email or not. OR, and most likely, given who they have invited - they have not checked, they are in breach, and children at the school are at safeguarding risk.

If it's the first - they don't mind an email

if it's the second, you sure as hell want it written down.

I would be very tempted to FOI the questions formally, ASAP. Certainly before the visitors come to the school...

I’d stick to emails so that you have a hard evidence paper trail.

You can also link to relevant guidance so that it’s easier to directly quote it.

it’s quite possible they’ve not fully got their heads around it all yet in all honesty so a bit whacking them over the head with a bit of statutory guidance may be necessary.

Cass and for women Scotland ruling are two things that are directly linked to/ quoted in the equality impact document which only came out at the end of last week.

Agree with FOI too asap