Just because someone disagrees with you does not mean they haven't heard you or understood you.
You: "Or maybe any foreign “imposing” of anything is always reprehensible." [Emphasis added]
You: "If your starting position is to “impose western concepts of women’s rights on Arab countries” then yes you ARE a coloniser and yes that is always a bad thing" [Emphasis added]
Me: Well no, I don't agree that it's always be reprehensible because imposing measures to immediately protect women and children from terrible suffering such as rape and murder is better than letting it happen just so that you can avoid feeling like a coloniser.
You: ?!?!?
And here's a bonus just to prove I've read the whole thing!
You: "What western commentators should strive to do is work WITH women’s rights organisations in those areas, as allies and supporters. Not conquerors. Understand what they need and provide that instead of dictating to them what the correct model is."
Me: I am not a total moral relativist so I think that there are things which are always wrong, no matter the context or what anybody says. Rape and extreme misogynist subjugation are two. It is absolutely preferable, better, superior not to have it in any culture. The correct model is always to prevent it being perpetrated immediately, whatever the locals might think.
Your system of weeks? Months? Years? during which you consult with local groups to see whether or not they might like you to stop it and, if so, how and in what time frame has the advantage of making damn sure that noone can level the accusation of "coloniser" or "conqueror" at you but the unfortunate disadvantage of standing by while tens, hundreds, thousands more women and children are brought to suffering in the meantime. My preference if at all possible is to start by imposing measures that prevent those same tens, hundreds or thousands from ever suffering and let people call me what they like.
We can then consult and sort out everything else from that starting point.
Your approach sounds terribly nice until you follow the thought through to its practical implications.
I fear this may be a waste of time, but at least it's here for others to read should they wish to.