The Bluestocking Women’s Pub - Where Everybody Knows Your Username

[MarieDeGournay]

Welcome to the Bluestocking Arms, the home of good company, excellent drinks and delicious cakes which magically have no irksome contents like gluten or sugar or calories or the kind of alcohol that causes problems - but you wouldn't know

Food and drink are served by a keen staff of gerbils, and other animals such as capybaras, quokkas, etc., also fulfil vital roles, while looking cute AF.

New Bluestockingers always welcome.

A canon, Boily? 😉

so that’s what’s been going on in android’s secret lab - creating carnivore rodents? I’m sorry but why did anyone think that was an experiment worth doing? Do we have an ethics committee?

Bugger! Did I mean cannon?

Those are the new teeth from the dentist. I did lodge my concerns, but apparently it's the new version of Turkey teeth. All the rage with the young folk apparently.

I think my chances of winning the turnip throwing have gone down substantially.

Can someone find something they need the giant wombat to do at 9am?

There's a GCSE Maths exam this morning. Giant wombat is needed for last minute invigilation.

Anyone arriving by car will have to use the overflow car park down at the Staunch Ally, as Clarissa has taken over the main car park and is currently setting up the cauliflowers ready for 10 am.

Perfect! I don't think some of the girls are going to do too well considering their exam papers are upside down.

Am out gardening so cannot follow this funny theme until it is all over boo hoo

Bizarrely the boys are being invigilated by a giant wombat as well. They obviously make excellent invigilators.

I don't think I'm very good at turnip throwing.

And why do I have a tail?

All the vegetable and fruit enthusiasts who don't want to see wicked waste makes woeful want going on in front of our very eyes can take refuge in the walled garden (to the left of the path up to the capybara pool, access through the stable yard, past the rehearsal space and the cabaret bar).

Maybe the capybaras could invite the beavers down for a (still very fresh) chopped, minced, and mangled feast in the late afternoon.

No MN, that is not a sensitive image.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Oh I do love you all.
Gerbils v Vegetables Sports Day. Who'd have thought it!

Ooh good throw Glenda.

I'll just get a capybara to get your turnip off the pub roof.

Poor Glenda, despite throwing her turnip the furthest, was disqualified as her turnip didn't land in the scoring zone.

But congratulations to:

Germoleen Gold at 3.134 metres
Gladys Silver at 2.654 metres
Gena Bronze 2.458 metres.

I suppose someone could gather up the scattered veg and make some soup...

Gosie has started a pea-rolling competition. Ginny, on the other hand, having come last in the Turnip Chuck, has retreated into the empty bar and is living up (or down) to her name. She is currently face down on the carpet with an empty bottle of Bombay Sapphire next to her.

I gather from Glenda, who also came in to drown her sorrows (but stopped after a 'just one large double') she drank it neat.

Next up we have cauliflower bullseye archery.

The gerbils are just warming up.

Ginny is going to have a sore head tomorrow

@EdithStourton did Gosie sort out the betting license? Or do I need to confiscate the gerbils pocket money? They are definitely placing bets. Young Glavia is favourite to win apparently.

I've been invigilating this morning too. You wouldn't cheat with a magpie staring beadily at you, any more than if you had a giant wombat breathing down your neck!

Unfortunately due to unforseen (I know I know, it's not THAT unforseen) the cauliflower bullseye archery competition has had to be abandoned.

Things are however going swimmingly in the 'Burn the Herb" tent.

I'll join you in the walled garden. I'll bring some tarragon lemonade (recent Georgian restaurant discovery).

I just popped in briefly as I'm recovering from a migraine,and I'm so glad I did because the gerbil veggie Olympics has me laughing out loud, wiping away literal as in literal tears. The herb burning tent and the unfortunate though not entirely unpredictable attendance of paramedics really set me off 😂😂😂
You are a wonderfully funny lot, aren't you?❤

I think the gerbil pea-rolling on a snooker/pool/whatever table looks really exciting, I can see it taking off in real life, with highly-trained gerbils becoming superstars because of their pea-potting ability. I'd watch it on TV in preference to the human snooker players😀

I'm thinking about the rules - there'd have to be a kind of offside rule whereby the player had to be a certain distance away from the pocket before they could roll the pea, you couldn't just walk it in, that would be too easy.
Shouldn't one of the peas be white? I'm presuming that the player tries to pot the pea by striking it with their own pea, like in snooker - the presence of a spare pea near the pocket in your image would suggest that, Boily.
Do they take it in turns in a gentlemanly fashion, or is the presence of the whole damn lot of them on the table evidence that it's down to whoever gets their shot off first, every gerbil for herself, sauve-qui-peut and all that?

I think I'm getting a bit too involved in this Gerbil Pea-Potting proto-sport, so I'm going to return to the darkened room from whence I emerged to see what was happening in the Bluestocking; overall, I'm very glad I did

I was down wind of the tent when 'Burn the Herb' started, I'm feeling a little woozy 🥴

The pygmy hogs are collecting the used and abused vegetables. They won't go to waste.

Zzzzzzzzz....