If you could turn the clock back, there were a thousand ways you (by which I mean trans people in general) could have averted this disaster.
You could have spoken up when male rapists were put in female prisons and said, "Not in our name."
You could have made it perfectly clear that you didn't have a problem with female rape survivors having their own rape crisis groups, and that if they were being denied this for your benefit, that was wrong.
You could have stood up for any of the women who lost their livelihoods for saying something you disagreed with and said that although you disagreed with their opinion, you respected their right to hold it.
You could have publicly called out those among your number who made rape and death threats to feminists, said this isn't what you stand for, not marched shoulder to shoulder with them.
You could have agreed that it was wrong for trans women to compete in women's sports, that that isn't a human right at all and has nothing to do with living your lives in dignity.
You could have said, "Thank you for wanting to profile me on International Women's Day, I'm very honoured, but I think it might get people's backs up if the focus is on me for the one day of the year that is devoted to women. We have Pride Month and Trans History Month and Trans Day of Visibility and I'd be absolutely delighted to do something for you during any of those events instead."
You could have said, "Of course we don't count towards the female quota for board members, come on, don't be ridiculous."
You could have refrained from calling people TERFs and bigots and, well, been kind.
Surely if you actually thought we were all in some kind of sisterhood together, you would have done these things.
But you didn't, did you?