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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Thank you MNHQ

315 replies

Blistory · 16/04/2025 15:20

I don't post much on here anymore but just wanted to take a moment today to thank Mumsnet @MNHQ and Justine in particular for standing strong over a considerable number of years.

I fully appreciate that not all Mumsnet members or employees held the same beliefs but in the fury of doxing, banning, and insults, MNHQ held the line to enable this space where women were able to have a discussion.

I know the arguments and concerns over the years but the fact is that this was the only public space for a considerable number of years where a conversation was allowed about what came to be known as gender critical concerns.

This was where women came to gather, to discuss, to learn, to be heard, to form new spaces, to support and to stand strong. It wasn't always a pleasant place to be but it was always a place that was allowed to exist. It stood against the pressure groups, the hate, the doxxing, the pressure of advertisers, Stonewall law and it did so by simply being allowed to exist. The women on here and in the wider world did the rest. It's easy to forget just how difficult it was for MNHQ to hold the line especially when being attacked by all sides.

Thank you.

OP posts:
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NotDarkGothicMama · 17/04/2025 10:55

Thankyou Justine. I had a big Ocado shop delivered yesterday but have now cancelled next week's delivery and won't shop with them again. "Hateful political views" indeed! Legal and legitimate, more like.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 17/04/2025 11:03

JustineMumsnet · 17/04/2025 07:51

Thanks all – I really appreciate the appreciation. It’s been severely testing at times – there were moments I genuinely thought we might never see the tide turn, or at least not in our generation. And in the meantime, Mumsnet risked being permanently labelled as bigoted, vicious, and ‘on the wrong side of history’.

A fair number of organisations pulled their advertising under pressure from activists – both internal and external. I’m sure there were many more we never heard from who simply steered clear. Commercial partnerships became noticeably harder to secure. The low point was discovering we’d been blacklisted on instruction from the top brass at Barclays – just weeks before their CEO resigned over concealing ties to Jeffrey Epstein.

When we included a call to clarify the definition of sex in the Equality Act in our 2024 Mumsnet Manifesto, Ocado – who had been excited about a partnership – abruptly pulled out, citing Mumsnet’s “hateful political views”. Despite repeated attempts to explain our position – as a platform committed to amplifying women’s voices – they’ve refused to speak to us ever since.

Nonetheless, even in the darkest moments, when I feared the site might not survive, we never considered banning discussion of this issue altogether. That would have been completely contrary to what Mumsnet is about: a space for mothers to talk about what matters to them. We’ve always believed in the power of respectful, open discussion – especially on difficult topics. And again and again, users have told us that Mumsnet has helped them change their minds, or at least understand a different point of view.

That spirit is what inspired our This Is My Child campaign back in 2013, prompted by a thread where a mother described her own child’s disruptive behaviour – and then explained he had additional needs, and what it was like to parent under constant public judgment. The discussion that followed was one of the most powerful we’ve hosted – and helped many people see things differently.

On the issue of women’s rights, I know some felt we policed conversations too tightly at times. But please remember the pressure we were under. A single sentence, taken out of context and amplified by activists on social media, could result in advertisers – already jittery, particularly during Covid – disappearing overnight and without the advertising we simply cannot cover our running costs and the site would have folded. We were also aware that some activists, posing as users, were deliberately trying to bait others into saying something that could be used to damage us.

So a big well done to everyone on here who played a part in securing what I think most would agree is much-needed clarity in the Equality Act. As ever, we’re in awe of the intelligence, tenacity and resilience of Mumsnet users.

Thank you ❤️

MarieDeGournay · 17/04/2025 11:10

The most significant thing I can say to express my thanks to MNHQ is - think of this world, this social context, this legal environment, this whole kit and kaboodle, and then think what it would be like if MN and FWR did NOT exist.
What an awful thought.

It's been a life raft on a stormy sea, thank you so much MN.💖

Datun · 17/04/2025 11:15

Bloody Ocado? A few months ago?

Ocado

Who the bloody hell do they think keeps them in business???

It's extraordinary. Who managed to convince those spineless fuckers that ignoring millions and millions of women and their basic, really basic rights, was in their interests?

i'm really glad Justine told us that.

A newspaper called yesterday's decision, seismic. And it really is.

The door to the right side of history is gonna get pretty busy, my guess is that some grovelling is on its way

Bloody Ocado! I can't get over it.

Chariothorses · 17/04/2025 11:19

I don't think I fully appreciated how much pressure mumsnet was under @JustineMumsnet . Through Mumsnet, I have learnt so much from other women and connected with others with a similar family experience of some of the issues raised. As a group we were invited to get our voices heard by MPs/ Lords, something we never expected or sought when in day to life we couldn't speak up. Thanks.

Willandra · 17/04/2025 11:26

Thank you MNHQ 🐨

From Australia.

Oblomov25 · 17/04/2025 11:31

I do agree. MN stance of holding the line, was supportive of women so thank you Justine.

AnneElliott · 17/04/2025 11:31

Adding my thanks as well. I’m a lurker more than a poster but like other posters I came for the baby advice and stayed for the discussion. Baby is now a proper adult and says I have been ‘radicalised by Mumsnet’ which I am more than happy to agree with.

AnneElliott · 17/04/2025 11:34

Similarly on Ocado I have a shop coming today that I can’t cancel but that will be the last one. Who do they think does the bloody food shop for goodness sake!

I do love a good boycott so would also welcome a list of those companies that don’t support women talking about matters that affect them.

margegunderson · 17/04/2025 11:35

I agree. Learned so much here.

JulesJules · 17/04/2025 11:38

Bloody Ocado eh. And Barclays. Well - FAFO

lcakethereforeIam · 17/04/2025 11:58

I've just read Justine's post. I held it together yesterday, but that genuinely made me tear up ❤️

Unforgettablefire · 17/04/2025 12:03

Thank you mumsnet ♥️

EastCoastDweller · 17/04/2025 12:10

What everyone else has said more eloquently than I can. Many, many thanks.

JazzyJelly · 17/04/2025 12:14

👏👏👏

HandsomeCleverandRich · 17/04/2025 12:20

Thank you MNHQ. As an arts academic in one of the unis much mentioned in dispatches I’ve very much appreciated the space MN have accorded us all to discuss questions so fundamentally about us, which otherwise and elsewhere were so determinedly going on without us. Otherwise I often felt like I was going insane.

TheDefiant · 17/04/2025 12:29

And another thank you from me. I was a premium subscriber for a few years to say thanks (stopped due to CoL) though may restart. This site cost me a fortune in supporting legal fees though. Every penny well worth it. Thank you thank you to MNHQ and all the amazing women on here.

VisitationRights · 17/04/2025 13:15

Many thanks to MNHQ 💐👏🙏

andtheworldrollson · 17/04/2025 13:18

Thank you munsnet, Justine and all

Willandra · 17/04/2025 13:18

AnneElliott · 17/04/2025 11:34

Similarly on Ocado I have a shop coming today that I can’t cancel but that will be the last one. Who do they think does the bloody food shop for goodness sake!

I do love a good boycott so would also welcome a list of those companies that don’t support women talking about matters that affect them.

Good idea!

To paraphrase Black Books, I wish I shopped at Ocado so I could stop.

howard97A · 17/04/2025 13:48

Thank you, Mumsnet.

WithSilverBells · 17/04/2025 13:49

Radicalised on Mumsnet👋Thank you, Justine

ArabellaScott · 17/04/2025 13:53

Ocado don't seem to have tweeted since December.

https://x.com/Ocado

They can fuck off, though.

https://x.com/Ocado

chilling19 · 17/04/2025 13:54

👍👍👏👏

LlynTegid · 17/04/2025 13:57

Many thanks from me too.