The Bluestocking - where Spring has sprung and the grass is riz.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Welcome all. Can the gerbils please ensure that all the Tunnocks products are safely stowed in the capacious larder, and perhaps the quokkas could be responsible for counting everyone onto the bus and back off at the new thread - many thanks!

We are. Did you see the lifeguard who dropped through the Staunch Ally time travel portal from 1905? A fine figure of a (married) man, you'd feel safe in his hands.

Some of us also have an evil sense of humour.

My laptop told me it was sensitive content so I clicked on it excitedly...

But then, FB has recently told me that the clip of Zelensky punching Trump in the Oval Office was fake news...

Nah. I am the same skinny, ginger midget wherever I materialise. I would really like to have @Swashbuckled'd cheekbones though.

I'm surprised your lifeguard hasn't caused more of a stir, Deano - even I thought he was kinda cute!
I was also found his muscles interesting - no not that kind of interesting🙄-because men in old photos often look really skinny. I saw a footie match from the 70s on the TV the other evening and the players looked positively frail alongside today's players, little skinny legs and narrow shoulders.
So your lifeguard would have looked very striking in 1905, I reckon he looks quite 2025.

I am neither slender nor lissom. If I were any rounder, I’d have an Equator, not a waist.

But I am gradually losing a bit of weight, or so people tell me.

I'm statuesque and buxom personally. Or so I tell myself. Certainly not slender nor lissom!

I think it’s interesting that a man could appear on the beach like that today, without his hat (how bold!) and his clothing would be unremarkable. Perhaps that’s also true for the man in the background.

The women would look most odd, though.

What struck me, @MarieDeGournay , about the lifeguard’s appearance, is how deep his tan is. If you can bear to look at his chest near the armholes of his top you’ll see he’s really quite pale.

I don’t know what they used as sunscreen in 1905, other than parasols and covering up with clothing.

I went to a St Patrick’s Night in the pub last night. Violins and singing with an attempt at a ceilidh. Late night.

This morning I’m having a wall rebuilt so it’s all a bit bangy.

Anyway, apparently some cheeky gerbils hitched a ride in my pockets. They seemed to be having a good time. I think they might be a bit worse for wear today though, and I’m hoping it doesn’t affect their duties too much…

I heard one, rather sleepy and nursing a large black coffee, tell one of her colleagues that she'd been 'on the crack'. I'm hoping she was just demonstrating a misunderstanding of the gaelic tongue.

The bakery gerbils have made a lovely selection of Danish pastries.

Which reminds me that I have to finish constructing a green-white-and-orange trifle to take with me when I go to lunch with friends. I knew buying a few extra gluten-free sponge cakes at Christmas was a good idea.

The jam and fruit layer is properly orange, with apricot jam and finely sliced tinned peaches. I have lots of white double cream ready for whipping, and a selection of expensive green candied fruits for decoration - angelica, obviously, something that might be a candied fig, or maybe a plum, and a slice of citron. I think it's citron.

One of those occasions when you know you've done it right if it makes people laugh (and then enjoy eating it).

🤣

Oh, bless her. I’m going with her misunderstanding. I can’t bear to think of any of the gerbils having to go through a drug detox, or us needing that kind of room in the Blue Stocking.

@DeanElderberry

That trifle sounds very impressive.

I saw some bright green herbs in the smoking library the other day. Perhaps a little sprinkling would add to the greenery….

That's a really good point. Up to very recently Irish men were [in]famous for having a 'farmer's tan' which only appeared where the open neck and rolled-up sleeves of their shirt stopped..
That must be a new bathing cossie the lifeguard is wearing, his old one must have had smaller armholes.
Alternatively he's a modern bloke photoshopped into a 1905 photo
Well, Deano, you've certainly given AsWithGlad and me something to exercise our forensic skills on😄

He probably only lifeguarded part-time. He might have got some of the tan doing the day job, which is why the tan lines don't match his swim suit. His toes are also pale, and now I'm thinking about footwear.

Is that a knitted cossie? It'll be down to his ankles if it gets wet!

Oh hello there Swash😍 lovely to see you, and how are you today, sweetie?
😄

A céilí [Irish Gaelic spelling, we simplified the spelling, the Scots Gaelic folk didn't] followed by rebuilding a wall sounds like a bit of an assault on the senses😨

The gerbils on the left are obviously participating in Burns night, not St Patrick's, but the ones on the right look like they're putting on a grand 'session' - the one under the flag is even playing a harmonica, which is actually great for playing Irish music. But there's the one on the counter who isn't sure what to do with the violin..
For some reason not one of them is drinking 'the black stuff'.

I love the sound of your tricoloured trifle Deano!
My mam always used to make us green-white-and-orange vegetables on St Patrick's Day, lining up cabbage, potato and carrot like a flag; and then for sweet, greengage jelly, ice cream and orange jelly

The lifeguard was better on yesterdays Chronophoto line-up because it was possible to zoom - that's how I spotted his wedding ring.

The only herbs I'll take with rather than in my trifle (now adorned with 'shamrocks' and a tricolour border) are freshly picked lovage and chives, in the hope that there will be potatoes. I'm also taking a bottle of non-alcoholic wine because I have discovered that I really dislike drinking during the day.

I must let my kind hostess know that I'll drive myself rather than needing a designate.

Can we have a picture?

Some of you are paying far too much attention to that chap in the photo. I know I am.

I feel I've done my bit for St Patrick's Day by buying a bag of Keogh's (sp & pron???) cheese & onion crisps at Waitys yesterday. I was going to save them for the day but I was feeling piggy we'd run low on other snacks so we ate them last night. Jolly fine crisps.

I'll try, Cake, but I'm very bad at knowing that to do with images.

oooops! It's an invitation for dinner tomorrow not lunch today. Fortunately I checked before I phoned. I must wrestle a trifle-shaped hole in the fridge. And defrost something to cook for dinner today.

No Mumsnet, it might be unedited and a bit rough round the edges, but it isn't a sensitive image.

It's in an 8" deep soufflé dish so there's plenty of stuff in there, beneath the superficial patriotic veneer.

Very nice, Deano, including your choice of tablecloth - d'you mind if I pop round?
Or are you bringing one to the Bluestocking later? I do enjoy a good trifle.

I made a cake the other day that had oranges in it, so does that count?