Darling sister and pronouns

[CheeseFromTheNorth]

I know this has cropped up many times, the sense of sadness when a close family member or friend seems to have joined the #bekind brigade.
Had a forwarded email from my sister who lives in another country, from her work address and she used pronouns in her email signature.
I don't understand it. She is all for social justice (Aboriginal rights) across the board and proclaims to be a feminist.
I won't have a conversation about this with her until I see her in person. But when I do my line will be something along the lines of "I used to respect pronouns, as I saw no harm in it. But as I read more and more about male rapists wanting to be referred to as she/her and all institutions complying with it, I realised that something is very wrong.
Who do I decide "deserves" those pronouns? The trans identifying male that's kind but doesn't pass? The male rapist because he speaks of gender dysphoria, but forces his victim to use language such as "her penis" when testifying in court?
So I've drawn and line and will refer to a man who identifies as a woman by their name".

That's all I would say, it does share my opinion and shows the time line of thinking over the years. I have been overweight for many years (not anymore) so I don't think that me raising the sports issue rings true as a reason for me to be of the anti-pronoun brigade (of course no man should be in women's sports but sports is never something I've been interested in, so it rings false for me to be passionate about it), but I HAVE been sexually assaulted many times, so this is my hill.

Keeping discussions like this light and giving food for thought is the way to go imho.

But what has been troubling me is the "why"? Why has she not looked in to this? She too is a SA survivor and it was a particularly horrendous event that has very badly scarred her.

Sorry for the long post.

Mixed sex toilets have been proven to be less safe for women. That’s just a fact.
The rest of your post is nonsense.

Wading through all this nonsense, let's focus on one thing here ...

Men have always attacked women so let's just ... make it easier for them?

Is that seriously the angle you're taking here? 🤯

I am female and use the word love all the time

What does it matter what pronoun your sister uses?

Lots of trans activists coming out of their Mum's basements tonight I see.

Read the thread and you'll understand why us women refuse to accept the use of pronouns as a benign matter.

I suspect there'll be 100 more new accounts posting "but pronouns are innocuous'" tonight.

Pronouns lead us to Lia Thomas dangling his willy around women and stealing their medals

Pronouns lead us to women self-excluding in rape crisis centres

Pronouns lead us to women being raped and impregnated by men (calling themselves transwomen) in women's prisons

Is that not enough. You are on a women's rights board. These ^^ are men decimating women's rights

So do I, however not as the opening word to a stranger on the internet telling her her rape wasn't important enough to have a view

Only a man would do that. ONLY A MAN

Sigh...

...well...

Gender isn't real and the group who like to push the ideology are struggling as it hasn't taken a wider hold.
I expect every new ideology goes through this phase. Then it drops to the groups with tambourines on street corners or pamphlets through doorways.
I see Keira Bell is bravely fighting to stop more DC being impacted before the movement calms down.

Yawn at the ludicrous idea gender critical women are demanding femininity when it is the TRAs who claim that wearing dresses, make up and heels make you a woman.
A woman is any adult human female, regardless of how they present. It's genderism that says boys must be girls if they are gentle and enjoy playing with dolls, and girls must be boys if they'd rather be climbing trees. TRAs reinforce gender stereotypes.

Oh for goodness sake, we're not "making it easier for them" 🙄 We are simply advocating safe spaces for EVERYONE, not just the ones who dress and look as you want them to.

Safe spaces for women exclude all men, whatever they're wearing. Single-sex spaces protect women's privacy, dignity and safety.

Nobody but TRAs has suggested this requires a dress code. It just needs all men, even those who are trans-identified, to stay out of them.

Really, trans-identified men should be campaign to change men's attitudes about men who wear dresses or make up using men's toilets, as this seems to be a major concern for them, despite little or no evidence that there is any threat.

In comparison, men demanding access to women's spaces demonstrate a complete lack of regard for women's safety, privacy and dignity.

Any man, however he identifies, who invades female spaces, is acting in a predatory manner.

What gives YOU the right to decide what someone else should wear? Because unless you think you have that right, you wouldn't dream of confronting ANYONE in a public space and asking them about their genitalia. Or are you seriously suggesting that you ask everyone iypu see n there?

You are spectacularly missing the point. I don't care what men or women wear. I just want single-sex spaces to stay single sex. No men in women's spaces, regardless of how they identify or present.

And yes, I would and have challenged men in female spaces.

TRAs always claim this is about genital inspections, which is unbelievably offensive to women who've experienced male sexual violence and vehemently don't want to be exposed to genitalia.

Why is it that you always assume men will ignore women asking for privacy and dignity so that we have to have a way of gatekeeping entry? Is it because you think that men are naturally predatory and the ones who want to access women's spaces are the ones who would lie to gain entry? Can't you see that men who can't be trusted to recognise social norms that protect women present a higher risk?

What gives YOU the right to tell women they have to accept predatory men invading their privacy?

Your "friend" isn't being truthful.

The point is that you only THINK you know who is make or female, based on their appearance, which is discriminatory at best. Women are targeted by people like you, who think they have the right to judge what gender they are, based solely on how they look.

No, it's not about judging clothes. Male and female differences are real, it's visible. Clothing and fake additions don't hide it.

Recognising the opposite sex is an apex evolutionary skill. If it's something you struggle with, then that's a skill issue you should be concerned about and should possibly seek medical advice. We can recognise the sex of other people in poor light from a distance. Babies can do it.

With the recent Fife NHS case nobody believed Upton was female and the judge ruled it wouldn't out him as male if his anonymity wasn't waived because it was clearly obvious that he was male to everyone who met him.

You are obfuscating and claiming women are being discriminatory for being able to see what is clearly evident, and for being naturally uncomfortable encountering males in female space.

Additionally, I've never judged someone's gender. I don't care about gender. I observe someone's sex. Because millennia of evolution have programmed me to.

This works both ways. My son claims to be so hurt by my "lack of acceptance" because I have found myself unable to lie repeatedly by using his "preferred" pronouns. But I am not allowed (by transactivists) to be hurt by this demand to deny my son and pretend he is my daughter. As I'm not young, and I have autistic type characteristics, this causes me severe cognitive dissonance and confusion of speech, as a lot of attention goes into the struggle to express myself both truthfully and "kindly", which is impossible.

So please don't talk about how nice it is to be "clear and correct". That means using pronouns with reference to the sex of the person referred to, which results in shouts of "bigot". Compelled speech is a genuine problem, caused entirely by the trans identity zealots.

You've missed the point. Until recently, the Bench Equal Treatment Book required that witnesses not use "he" to refer to the man who raped them if he identifies as a woman. It's one thing for a defendant to think of himself as "she", but quite another for his victim to be barred from calling him "he".

When I'm observing someone's sex, I'm not looking at their clothes.

I'm listening to their voice, assessing their pheromones (or more accurately my hormonal response to their pheromones), and I'm looking at:

• overall face shape
• brow profile
• hip:waist and hip:shoulder ratios
• gait
• height
• hand shape and size
• presence or absence of an Adam's apple
• hair line
• arm length:torso length ratio
• foot size

It takes less than a second 99% of the time and I'm right 99% of the time, like most women.

The consequences to women for getting it wrong can be murder, so natural selection has favoured those who get it right.

We can't reverse the gender stereotyping by going along with the idea that putting on a dress makes a man a woman, and that it is bigoted to use the word man and pronouns such as he and himself to refer to him!

And the q% of the time ypure admitying that you got it wrong? (Which incidentally is a higher % than the % of transwomen that apparently scare you so much). You don't care about them? The women that are terrified of going into public conveniences because of people like you? But they don't matter, do they? 🤬

Why are they terrified? Because some woman might possibly make a mistake? And then apologise when it becomes clear, for example when the mis-sexed woman soeaks?

It's utter fucking bullshit to claim that women are sincerely frightened of using the loo because another woman might mistake them for a man. They might fear that a man might mistake them for a man, but they don't fear that women will. Women very rarely use violence against men and it ends badly for us if we try, so if a woman thinks a man has entered the loo, she's not likely to attack him.

If men are attacking women who they mistake for men, that's men being same-old violent men. Male violence is never women's fault so stop blaming women for it.

I've been mistaken for a man many times, usually in conditions of dim lighting. As soon as I speak in reply, the misunderstanding is resolved because my voice gives the game away. The only time that I was attacked on the basis of being mistaken for a man, it was by a man. I have not been in anyway unsafe when a woman has mistaken me for a man.

I would rather be challenged every time I use a public loo for the rest of my life than have one little girl fall foul of someone like "Katie" Dolatowski, because women's safety matters more than my feelings.