How best to answer 'What are your preferred pronouns?' in an intervew

[NancyDrawed]

I have been out of the workforce for a very long time but finally have an in-person interview later this week.

The confirmation email is signed by a name followed by (he/him/his). I need to get a job. But I am trying to get my head around what I would say if I was directly asked what my preferred pronouns are.

On principle I would like to say 'I'm not a follower of that ideology so use whichever you see fit' or something along those lines, but is that likely to mean I have no chance of getting the job?

I am clearly female, so a small part of me would want to say he/him/his just to see the reaction!

It might not even come up at all, but I'd like to be prepared.

The word 'factually' is not redundant at all. My use of the word 'belief' for what i may presume some feels in their head proves that it's all just belief and none of it is fact. Therefore the teachers can only 'claim to be' non-binary. They are not simply 'non-binary' as you previously stated. It is a claim, it is an unfounded belief.

Sex is binary, this is a scientific fact. It is not a belief or a theory.
There is no such thing in humans as non-binary sex. Fact.

I don't 'identify' as female. I simply AM female. Your sex is a biological fact, not an 'identity'.

In the unlikely event I was asked, it would be a way to select myself out of working at a TRA bullshit infested place. I'd be sorely tempted to say "None. How can someone who doesn't legally exist in this country have pronouns?"

Also, say we buy into this 'your pronouns define your gender identity rather than your factual sex' business. What the hell are the pronouns for the other 72 genders there are supposed to be?

In for a penny . . .

I agree 'female pronouns are fine' is a good one for an interview. You could say 'is that relevant to the position?' if you feel like pushing back. I think you probably won't get asked though.

I'd go with "sex based" and leave it at that. That what I plan to say if asked but I've not been asked personally. Constantly asked it in forms form my kids though

Everyone knows this already.

I got that in a form for volunteering. I put "the ones appropriate to my sex" and never heard from them again, which suited me fine.

If you're female what is wrong with she / her?

It's wrong asking because of all it implies. This isn't a question anyone but TRA ideologues or their brainwashed patsies ask.

No, don't try "can't you tell?".
I've tried that (l'm a conventionally attractive blonde, and I was wearing a skirt), and I was told "that's not very helpful Sean".
"It's Sian" I said, not realising I was walking into a trap; "well there you are SIAN, if I'd known your pronouns I wouldn't have needed to try to pronounce your name".

And the answer to that would be, "What sort of manager doesn't bother with pronouncing people's actual names correctly?"

And the answer to that would be, "What sort of manager doesn't bother with pronouncing people's actual names correctly?"

Quite.

If you really need the job give the answer you know they want.

Thanks for all the suggestions!

I'm generally a bit of a mouse in reality, but this awful, harmful ideology has helped me to find some fire.

As a number of PP said, I probably won't even get asked, it was just the he/him/his that got me thinking I might be - as a sort of soft ice-breaker question at the start. As in 'Thank you for coming. Before we get started I'd like to ask which pronouns you would like us to use for you?'

But as I said, I haven't had an interview for YEARS so my made up scenario might be way off the mark!

Ha ha! Best answer on the thread .

Choosing 'your' pronouns is more double- think though isn't it.

Even asking assumes that pronouns are no longer sex based - because sometimes they aren't, that's literally why people feel the need to ask/announce.

Then others upthread have argued that having them on an email signature is helpful in the case of people with ambiguous names in order to know their sex.

Well...it would be, if pronouns hadn't been uncoupled from sex. Now it tells you precisely nothing about that person, apart from the gender identity that they have/ feel like they should have.

This is why it's so disingenuous to say 'you're female, what's wrong with just saying she/her?'. Saying 'she/ her' implies a gender identity of female, regardless of sex. Because pronouns now seem to signify gender, not sex (otherwise how can we have 72 of them)?

And this is the problem. Language has been so successfully mangled (queered) that no one can agree on how it works anymore.

I don't understand what is so difficult to grasp about this. Either pronouns are sex based as they've always been and therefore in 99.9% of cases no need to ask....or they signify gender, in which case they tell us precisely nothing apart from which stereotypes a person likes to have associated with them, and which ideology they believe in (or feel compelled to pretend to believe in).

OP, if you want the job just go with 'female'. Only you know your circumstances, how much you need the job and how much of this bs youre prepared to put up with.

Yes that’s exactly how it came up in mine. The interviewer might possibly have been surprised that it didn’t in fact put me ease (obviously I was dying inside and thinking ‘ugh, what a terrible start’), but we moved on immediately and it didn’t cause any problems. With any luck he/she/they felt even more awkward than I did!

I agree with this.
In this hypothetical situation (you say yourself it hasn't even happened yet) I might be a bit 🫤 at being asked, but I'd just say she/her which I am.
It honestly doesn't matter to me, but it might to someone else.

Why is it assumed it will come up in an interview?

Which to that I'd hope they'd call you something different either time just for the laugh 😁
Bet you'd soon get fed up of it in RL

They are words that replace nouns in a sentence.

Oh you meant my personal pronouns? Well considering you wouldn't use them if I was present I don't mind what you use.

Because the interview confirmation email is signed by someone who has announced his pronouns. Suggests the culture of the workplace? Just a thought.

You don’t actually need pronouns, do you, when talking directly to someone? “That’s not very helpful, she/her” doesn’t work does it?

The world is full of arseholes, isn’t it.

Out of interest have you read the thread? I've posted already about why "It honestly doesn't matter to me, but it might to someone else" is not the casual kindness it might appear at first, but to summarise:

When you accept that male people may legitimately use women's language for themselves, you accept that being a "woman" is about how a person thinks not the body they have.

That means you are accepting that every single other person who uses women's language for themselves has that "womanny way of thinking", and that whatever we know happened to Women in the past (and indeed today) must have happened to them because of that womanny way of thinking not because they have female bodies.

As someone with a female body I find that breathtakingly offensive. It matters a LOT to me that the language of womanhood is not made into something sexist and/or meaningless by including males.

If you think the men it "might matter to" are more important than women like me to whom it also matters but in the exact opposite way that is of course your right, but pleas understand and own that you are doing is not a nice, no cost gesture, but endorsing a sexist position to the detriment of female rights and visbility.