Sexist and dangerous Samaritans ad

[Meadowbird]

https://twitter.com/samaritans/status/1760599123923722266

A really bizarre ad - encouraging lone women to approach disturbed men on deserted train station platforms and ask them out for a coffee. What could possibly go wrong? They also will become sexier if they do apparently.

They could have used a man. But it seems it is the responsibility of women to keep men from harming themselves. Even if women are more likely to be the victim of the man in this scenario. It could have been such a good message, with just a little thought.

She didn’t ask him for a coffee, she asked where she could get a coffee.

Where are you getting the “sexier” thing done?

Your looking for something that isnt there.
May i suggest you have a look at the campaign.

https://www.networkrail.co.uk/communities/safety-in-the-community/railway-safety-campaigns/suicide-prevention-campaigns/

I saw this and couldn’t believe it. Encouraging lone women to strike up conversations with strange men in deserted locations seems criminally irresponsible

I can't see any hint of sexism or sexiness in it. It's a woman acting like a human.

Shelia, many people would interpret being asked where you can get a coffee as a chat up line. It’s not a wise thing for a woman to say to an unknown, disturbed man.
When she split in two the ‘unkind’ version was shown as hair up, no makeup, uncool and uptight whereas the ‘kind’ version was hair down, makeup, cool and attractive. Watch it again.
Why not have the woman reporting the man’s concerning behaviour to station staff. Why not have a man being ‘kind’.

They're not alone, there's a man standing behind him?

Cynthia, really? You really think it’s ok to encourage young women to put themselves at risk, to tell them to ignore their gut instincts and that they are doing something wrong and will be less cool if they decide not to stand on the edge of railway platform in front of a disturbed man and ask him for a coffee? You can’t see anything wrong with this? You don’t think it would be better if she went to get help instead? You think it was her personal responsibility to intervene?

A blurry man doing nothing - why couldn’t he be the one helping?

There is definitely a difference between ‘caring woman’ and ‘nervous’ woman, its very clear

Support human, that is all we are.

I agree with the stark difference in outfit between the cautious woman and the go speak to him woman.

It also shows no understanding about woman's safety.

Better to have shown her letting someone in authority know- but anyone with any knowledge of MH problems knows that no one in authority wants to help.

Because two men, one of whom is pitentially mentally distrubed, is so much better than one? On deserted train platforms?

It's like some sort of weird mind worm is in play that disabuses people of natural instincts to keep themselves safe.

And there might not be anyone else on the train or tube station in a lot of situations

i get meadows point, but ihink the advert premise is good, just could have been done a different way

If you felt safe in approaching someone you were concerned about, why would you not just ask if they were OK? Genuinely don't know the psychology or best practice in this.

I hate to agree because why shouldn't one person help another, but I think this was a poor choice for the reason you've given. They probably thought it was better than a random man approaching a vulnerable woman and decided on this as the only way to represent both genders.

It's the fact she's clearly uncomfortable and it's telling women to get over this discomfort for the benefit of an unknown man I find so disturbing.

I noticed the clear difference between the two styles of presentation immediately and thought it was lazy and relying on the old ‘up tight, anxious’ stereotype.

My thought was very clearly that women are now expected to do this as the social contract. It is not just about ‘being human’. The coffee aspect is not just ‘being human’. There is the implication that women should take on this caring role now.

Spot the difference

It is quite a strange advert. The platform isn't deserted, there is an employee in a hi-viz behind the suicidal man. The "sexier" bit is presumably because one version of the woman has her hair down and bright lipstick on.

No one should encourage women to actively second-guess their fear instinct and approach a sullen, disturbed man on the edge of a train platform. FFS.

And yes, her question could be interpreted as a chat-up line.

As the OP says, the whole ad is ignorant or uncaring of women's safety , and sexist in its staging of 'kind' and 'unkind'.

Why isn't the ad about the male member of staff in the hi-vis vest helping him instead?

Agree with you OP.

There are many other things the charity could be publicising and/or campaigning for to help reduce suicides on the tracks. Focusing on the public suggests that the public services are lacking

If alone or with DC at a quiet, unstaffed station I wouldn’t approach a man.

Given that they took the time to employ a third actor to play the person in the hi viz, why didn't they show the woman not having the crisis of conscience but just going straight up to the staff member and pointing out the potentially suicidal man to the staff member to deal with.

I think this is similar to bystander advice - if you see someone possibly being harassed, you don’t outright say “hey, leave her alone” - you ask a question about the timetable or whatever to break up the moment.

This.
Also...if it was obvious someone was in a bad place oc i would approach..but tentatively. I wouldn't just go up to someone who looked sad especially a man..