Assuming that Elan Closs Stephens is still Acting Chair of the BBC, it might be worth writing to her to:
- ask her to provide the specific form of words that parents should use when explaining to their nine year old daughter that “hole” is, in the considered opinion of the licence-fee funded BBC, a ‘cheeky play on words’; and
- invite her to clarify which hole, specifically, the BBC complaints department employee thinks this Adult Entertainment Industry worker, whom the BBC has entered into a fee-paying contract with, is alluding to in this supposedly ‘cheeky’ stage name.
Is this Adult Entertainment Industry Worker referring to Cheryl Cole’s mouth, as in ‘cake hole’? That could fairly be described as ‘cheeky’, but if so why not simply adopt the stage name Cheryl Cakehole?
Or is this Adult Entertainment Industry Worker referring to Cheryl Cole’s urethra perhaps? Does the BBC complaints department employee believe that the stage name refers to the term “pee hole”? And, if so, could the BBC Chair confirm which of the following does the BBC consider would best describe ‘a play on words’ on the term ‘pee hole’: ‘cheeky’, ‘juvenile’, ‘on a par with playground bullying’ or ‘so cringe it’s actually tragic’?
Or is the Adult Entertainment Industry Worker’s stage name referring to Cheryl Cole’s anus? Does the BBC complaints department employee believe the name is alluding to the term ‘a…hole’? If so, can the BBC Chair confirm whether it is the BBC’s position that the word ‘a…hole’ is funny, never deployed as an insult, and wholly suitable for a family audience? or vulgar and inappropriate for a family audience?
Is this Adult Entertainment Industry Worker referring to Cheryl Cole’s birth canal? In which case, does the BBC complaints department employee believe the stage name is alluding to the term “f- hole”? And if so can the BBC Chair confirm if the BBC considers the term ‘f-hole’ to be obscene, demeaning and deeply misogynistic? or does the BBC consider the term ‘f-hole’ to be lighthearted banter entirely in keeping with the BBC’s duty to “inform, educate, and entertain”?
Is it the BBC’s considered policy intention here to “inform and educate” female children into understanding, at as early an age as possible, that their lot in life as female humans is to be the object of sexualised ridicule and grotesque caricature from unfunny middle aged males, and that they had best shut up about the feelings of degradation it gives them, and laugh along as it’s all just family-friendly cheeky banter? Perhaps the BBC Chair could confirm.