If you either believe yourself that you have become a woman, or believe in the power to compel others to validate your chosen identity as a woman, then one of the ultimate experiences is to be given sex by a female kind of woman who exclusively and only sleeps with other female kinds of women.
Sex with one of them makes it real, it's a huge goal.
The refusal of female kind of women to get with the programme is a denial that a male person has sufficiently become a woman to count in their eyes, hence the rage. The attempts to punish and coerce until they will just get their clothes off and do it, hence the abhorrent incel stuff about women just 'learning to cope' with unwanted sex with a male body as if they were unpaid sex workers or sex toys. The degree of dehumanisation of these goal women is appalling. There is no sense in any of the rhetoric of the woman being a partner, a person, an equal entitled to have feelings, no responsibility towards her pleasure or consent, it's just the right to use her without her fussing and resisting.
This is all about requiring women to validate male people with their bodies.
Whether it's to get your knickers down and pee in the cubicle next to the male person, or to undress for swimming in a communal changing room, or to permit the male person to do an intimate exam or intimate care, or to provide lesbian sex, it is all about requiring women to validate with their bodies.
With rage and punishment for 'gatekeeping' these desired experiences. And it all links into the age old belief that women have no business gatekeeping their bodies from men with sexual needs, hence husbands being able to rape their wives as a marital right if she won't do her duty. It's the entitlement of the bloke who feels you up on the tube, or assaults you in a dark alley because you're walking around in possession of a body he feels he has an entitlement to, and who you are, how you identify, how you feel, if you consent- what's that got to do with it?
And yes. It all starts with a pronoun.