If I woke up tomorrow and was a man...

[Kinsters]

Just musing on sex and gender and trying to decide how I would really feel if I woke up tomorrow and I was a man.

Clothes, hobbies, make-up wouldn't change really. I don't really care much what people think of my appearance but I think there would be advantages to being perceived as a man, especially at work.

I wouldn't like being bigger in size. I like being small because I can fit more easily in places (writing that down it sounds silly). I'm sure there are advantages to being bigger/male proportioned that I've never known about or considered. It'd be great to be stronger too. Sex wise, if my DH was at the same time turned into a woman I think we could make it work. It would be an adjustment though.

I don't think waking up as a man would affect any of my day to day interactions - I could still do all the things I do with my kids. Maybe some of my friendships would be different but I have both male and female friends so maybe not.

I guess I just feel that fundamentally I wouldn't be that different. Anyone else pondered this and reached the same or different conclusion? Don't get me wrong, I like being a woman (although now I've been thinking about this a while - do I like being a woman? Really?). I guess I accept being a woman would be a better way of putting it. It is interesting to think how different life would be if I was a man.

I actually think it's quite important to home in on the sex aspect. That's the one thing I would struggle with as the idea of being a man and having sex with a man does not appeal to me. Is that homophobic? It feels like it might be.

If I woke up tomorrow as a man I think it would be liberating. I would like to go to my gym at 5 in the morning (24 hour gym) because it would not intimidate me that it is only staffed overnight via cctv (how does that work for safety?).

I'd like to not have to think about how my 13 year post partum body leaks wee and have to dress accordingly with pads and panty liners at work.

I'd like to not have to worry about walking home at night and not have to think about strageically holding keys and pretending to be on the phone in case I got attacked.

Thats just starters.

I’d love to experience sex as a man.

I don't think it's homophobic to have a sexual orientation, no.
This whole thought exercise is creeping me out TBH.

I also would not mind handing over the mental load of children. having the GP call me as the default parent. Having the school call me as the default parent. All the mental load.

Being talked about in the glowing terms by my parents as 'isn't it lovely that Tired is so hands on with parenting' as I pick up my Dcs from school a single once per week.

Oh yes please, if nothing else to stop the never ending periods from hell. Men don't get those, right?

Do we have to remain our current age? Or can I have a younger man's body (ooh err, Missus)? It's just that, decrepit though I may be, I'm a good bit healthier than my DP, who is collecting all the sort of ailments that go with being 'stressed over-50 male'.

I don't get periods! But of course that's at the cost of pregnancy, breastfeeding and hormonal contraception. That not being an issue would be a big plus. Plus the whole lack of a hormone cycle - I find the emotional ups and downs very trying.

Would you literally be you but a man, or would you change physically otherwise? (you say you wouldn't like being bigger in size.)
For me, work wouldn't change much, I don't think, as I'm freelance, WFH and nearly all of my communication with clients is via email. So although I have a feminine-ish name, I don't think my sex currently biases people that much.

I don't know if I'd still fancy my DP if I were male. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't fancy him if he were female though. And that's not homophobic, it's having a sexual orientation.

I go running on dark mornings already. Maybe that's foolhardy, I don't know. I tend to wear trousers and never wear heels. I might miss wearing dresses in summer though as that's the one time I do deviate from leggings/joggers etc. Maybe I'd just be a man in a dress. Or maybe I'd discover the seeming male passion for shorts (currently I loathe them).

I think I'm hitting perimenopause and I'd like not to be; no worrying about sudden periods/lack of periods/sore norks/weird moods/smelling odd etc.

I hope I'd keep my friends; none of my friends really fit gender stereotypes in that I don't have friendships with any leery footy men or girly hair-extensions. manicured women. And they're all pretty broad-minded, so I think they'd accept me with no problems and we'd just get on with taking the piss out of each other as per usual.

I would love to wake up and suddenly be in a male body! It would put a stop to menopause for one thing. No more feeling like shit and watching my body fall apart. No more periods. No risk of further pregnancy. No damage to my body caused by past pregnancy. No more being nervous in multi storey garages or dark streets in case I’m attacked. Risk of rape would be massively reduced. Metabolism would be increased so I could eat more, my capacity to build muscle would be increased too. I’d be faster and stronger. I wouldn’t have to faff about with hair and makeup and nails (or be judged for not doing so). Plus I’d get paid more and be more socially accepted, and ageing would only make me more attractive. There really isn’t a downside?

Personality wise I wouldn’t change, if that’s what you’re asking. My personality is not gendered or sexed, I’m just me. But in a physical sense I’d be much better off.

I’d quite like to have a wank and see what all the fuss about a penis is about. I don’t give my clitoris a moment’s thought most of the time but blokes seem pretty penis-oriented.

Childishly, I’d like to see how far I could pee.

If I could click my fingers and be anything for a year I would choose to be a wealthy white single man around the age of 35 - old enough to be taken seriously but young enough to have zero responsibilities except my commitment to myself and nobody would judge me for it.

Me too. It must be amazing if men are willing to commit crimes in order to have the experience of sticking it in something.

I'd like to try to write my name in the snow. Go for a walk on my own without worrying.

Age would be the same but condition also the same so if you're healthy now then that transfers over. Obviously any female health issues disappear!

I think body physique would have to change. Size, muscle composition etc are so different in men.

Physical ✔️
Personality ✖️
Sexuality ❓

That's what it comes down to in my mind - physical changes would be a good thing, personality change I don't think would happen, sexuality I am still confused about.

Anyway, it's midnight where I am so I should stop musing about this and go to bed. Look forward to reading everyone's thoughts when I wake up tomorrow (probably not as a man haha). It would be interesting to hear what a man would feel about waking up as a woman but I don't expect we get many men on this board.

I'd sit on the toilet for 40 minutes having a shit and a wank whilst the shower is going full pelt and then come out of the bathroom after probably having a 2 minute shower and then moan at the water bill and get everyone in the household on the water is precious conversation I might have someone like this at home

I think these days I'd just assume I'd taken some dodgy drugs and go back to bed.

Of course the next day if I was still male I'd be ringing government departments seeing if i could get an exchange for the superior female model.

Great thread and fascinating to see what people would want to experience as a man.

I'd like to experience sex as a man. To see / understand (and obviously feel) it from that perspective.

To be stronger physically and to feel safer must be freeing too.

I think our personalities would change a bit. We’re beasts of chemistry, our emotions/temperaments are influenced by what we eat, alcohol or drugs, and yes, hormones.

So many people on threads talking about relationships with people transitioning talk about the personality changes, and at least part of that has to be in response to hormones.

Certainly peri menopause has made me less tolerant of bullshit, feeling less need to centre other people, and ceasing to care what people think of me, and that’s hormones.

I’d quite like to have a wank and see what all the fuss about a penis is about. I don’t give my clitoris a moment’s thought most of the time but blokes seem pretty penis-oriented
My clitoris is a massive deal to me.

Ah, but think how much better it would be if you had a proper clitoris penis. For one thing you wouldn’t have to hide it away in your knickers, you could show it to everyone in pink Lycra leggings outside a courtroom, or a speedo budgie smuggler at the beach , or at a urinal, or to innocent school kids in the park.

My manly wish would be being able to buy big bags of compost again, I have to buy the smaller bags these days.

Sod sex. I want to write my name with pee and do helicopters me

Hmm all my male friends of a similar age are still party animals so presumably I'd have a lot more social fun as a male. I'd also find myself back in the career that fell apart for various female related reasons. So I'd be richer.

I love the thought of being a man having sex with another man! I really fancy men, so that's probably part of it, but there's also something compelling about the idea of sex free from the influence of misogyny and the worry of pregnancy. Sex on a more equal footing perhaps.

TBH I am not that interested in sex either.

I just want to not feel vulnerable. Every single bloody day.

I was a keen horse and pony rider in my teenage girlhood. All these cod psychs say that girls are into horses as sexual thrill. I never felt that. I just thought I fel not at the mercy of my physcial vulnerability on a horse. I think male people never really understand what it is to feel a constant physical vulnerability.