Declining to put my preferred pronouns in my email signature

[HowDoIGetThisThingOff]

It's finally happened, I've been "told" to put my preferred pronouns in my email signature at work.

I've emailed back saying my preference is that I don't do this. But I'm feeling a bit anxious 😬.

Please can I get some advice on what to say if they come back with questions or pressure to comply?

Does this make any sense to anyone?

Agree. It's such a weird word. What the hell is a womanhood?

I don't want an answer.

Translation: "I'm a Good People who chants the Good Mantras."

But as previous PPs have said, research has shown that there is still unconscious bias against women in the workplace (emails from men get prompter, less patronising replies etc). So drawing everyone's attention to that by labelling yourself female is not going to help.

So, no, I don't think it's petty.

Also, in emails, why do you need to know if a person is a man or a woman? Will that change how you respond to them?

Felix will explain all this (the one in pink) https://talk.tv/news/12128/no-im-not-going-to-tell-you-my-preferred-pronouns

I don't know what to advise, but I sympathise. My instinct is to resist such empty virtue-signalling. If trans or intersex people want to make their pronoun preferences clear I believe this should be respected, but for the rest of us - ie the vast majority - it's just silly.

I'm also sick of being asked for my ethnicity, gender, sexual preference (seriously! ffs!) and whether I have a disability on application forms. None of this should be relevant to whether or not I can do whatever it is - job, competition, uni application... I've even seen it on even feedback forms from tech support companies, in which case it's just blatant data mining. The last time this happened I wrote to the organisation in question and politely told them I found their questions deeply invasive and disrespectful. Predictably I suppose, there was no response.

Good luck. I hope you get this silliness resolved.

I’m trying to find the meme that shows exactly what the whole pronouns nonsense leads to which is essentially if you start she/her ing men you’re opening up the door to their demands to access every woman’s single sex space

Nope.

That poster is also ignoring the many times it's been mentioned on this and other threads that not revealing or bringing attention to the fact that you are female does protect you from stereotype threat in the workplace. I've seen various people say that they use their first initial only in order that they won't be subjected to bias.

(To be clear, I'm not going to use the boak inducing phrase 'hiding your womanhood').

This one?

This is a very quick Google, so one specific example for now:

https://sopro.io/resources/blog/email-conversion-rates-by-gender/#:~:text=The%20chances%20of%20a%20male,the%20gender%20of%20the%20recipient.

Hahaha I think I love you @tonyatotter
that's bloody brilliant 😂😂.
(Or should that be 'I think I love clip')

This one?

You've misunderstood/misread my point. I was suggesting - an interrogative suggestion - exactly what you are saying (I do research on discrimination against women for a living). You really need to read more carefully.

I'm sure you didn't mean to sound so patronising? Apologies for misunderstanding but it did read a little like you were asking people to provide evidence of discrimination.... I wasn't the only one who misunderstood and these things happen on a forum like this.

I also do research in this particular area for a living

Sadly not. There are also possessive adjectives which are pro forms, but not pronouns. Grammar is complex and quick to anger if you play around with it foolishly.....

There's no arguing with that.....ironically.

Ooo, it's a while since I explained why I can't in all honesty declare pronouns.

Let's recap.

She/her/hers are the third person pronouns used for women and girls in English.

There are currently two conflicting definitions of the word "woman". (And "man" also, but for now I'm explaining the situation in terms of women).

1. A sex based definition: "adult human female". The definition under which women were oppressed, and the definition under which women-only mitigations to counter that were set up.

1. A mind based definition: not sure what this actually is because it's never defined in a non - circular way, but I do know it's not related to physical sex because it's the definition under which TWAW is claimed, and the definition leveraged to appropriate provisions intended to be single sex for the benefit of trans women.

Since declaring pronouns is done in support of trans people, whenever pronouns are declared they are always using the second definition of woman.

I understand myself to be a woman by the first definition only. By the second definition I am not. So, in any context where pronouns are declared I cannot honestly say She/her/hers because this is claiming a gender identity I do not have.

However, although genderism has pushed me out of the language that hitherto described me, it also does not allow for the existence of people who simply exist in their sexed bodies. There are no names within genderism for female people, no pronouns that can describe female people alone. Therefore, omitting declaring pronouns is not simply a defiance of genderism, it is the only honest position I can take within genderism.

I dunno, it actually would feel quite patronising for me to say to a trans person “I’m Gladys and my pronouns are she/her” when that is the assumption that 99.9% of people are going to make when they see me.

You can’t get away from the fact that humans are very good at recognising what sex other humans are. It’s the small minority of people who present mixed cues that confuse us.

That’s the one @Waitwhat23 😁

I'm really not seeing the issue of someone assuming my pronouns.

The people I work with dont care, they call me by name.
If they are talking about me when I'm not there, I simply do not care what words they use about me. I cant hear it, I'm not affected by it.
If someone is emailing me outside my life or work, I dont see how their pronouns matter. I dont care, I wont be talking about them, if I did they wont know I'm talking about them.

If I get called sir, I still do not care. It's not important in life to be correctly sexed in person. Over email or phone it's even less important.

My life wont end, no ones life will end if they are miss sexed or correctly sexed.

...And of course the they/them thing is annoyingly grammatically incorrect. I wonder what happened to 'Xe' / 'Ze'? I see the need for a 3rd pronoun to accommodate gender neutral people, but why must it be a plural?

The 'they' has caused significant confusion (for me) more than once - not least with a pregnancy, where the mother thanked me for a gift saying 'they' will love it. I hadn't realised it was twins and went to buy a second gift - only to discover the unborn 'they' was singular, but the mother wanted the baby to be able to choose its own gender.

Because queer theory is toxic BS and shouldn't be pandered to.

I absolutely read it the same way you did @DollyTrolly - even on re-reading.

@Nousernamesleftatall hahaha brilliant 😂😂

This! 😁

Like others have said, if I see someone declaring pronouns, they automatically go down in my estimations... I don't want people to think badly of me!

It's a hill I will get slightly wounded on.

😁