Asked gender and pronouns on antenatal form

[bbypinkluffie]

So I’m 7 weeks today with my first, and yesterday I got given a midwife, and my first antenatal appointment was booked, and was told I had to fill this form out before the appointment, it had an entire section where the questions were “is the gender you were assigned at birth the gender you identify as now?” And “what gender do you identify as?” And “what are your pronouns?” I didn’t want to participate in their questions, as I don’t agree with gender ideology, I don’t want to have to “declare” myself a woman, I am one. I don’t want to “identify” as a woman, I am one. I’m pregnant for heavens sake! But regardless I filled out the entire gender section, saying yes I identify with my assigned gender at birth, I identify as female and my pronouns I chose as she/her. I only did this to avoid being asked during the appointment as it’s my first appointment and my first pregnancy and I don’t want it being ruined by being asked about pronouns. I only pray now I’ve jumped through their hoops I won’t be called a “pregnant person” or “birthing person” or “chest feeder” now. For heavens sake!

But surely these days even then they won't just randomly 'assign' they would do chromasonal testing?

It's a disorder, and an extremely rare one. It's got nothing to do with the fact that every other newborn will have an obviously male or female body, which is observable at birth.

Exactly this

How can anyone go through childbirth when any reference to female body parts are too much for them to cope with 😵‍💫
It's truly mind boggling.

Those people are vanishingly unlikely to ever need maternity care though.

I simply don't believe this is actually happening. Nobody who has such genuine and severe dysphoria about their female body that the most comfortable way for them to live their lives is to pretend to be male, and who is truly triggered by being referred to as female, is choosing to have a baby.

It's why cases like Freddy McConnell are so vanishingly rare. The people who actually choose to do this come across like narcissistic attention seekers who are approaching having a baby as some elaborate piece of performance art designed to show the world that men can get pregnant. The truly dysphoric would not do this.

I follow Sinead Watson, a Scottish detransitioned woman, on social media. She said something I thought was very interesting and relevant to this topic, I can't remember whether it was on Twitter or in a YouTube video. She said that when she was in the full grip of her dysphoria (she took testosterone for four years and had a double mastectomy so I'm guessing it was pretty awful), the absolute last thing she would have wanted is to be referred to as a person with a cervix or a person who menstruates, because being reminded that she had these bodily parts and functions was extremely triggering for her.

I know this is probably a rhetorical question, but just for the record I don't profess to know enough about being trans to begin to understand that myself.
I mean giving birth is a very female thing to do, surely if you say you are Male that's the last thing you'd want to do - pregnancy and birth, that is?
I just wouldn't have a problem asking how I identified as that's a way to make sure that everyone is referred to how they like, and what's the point of needlessly or deliberately going out of your way to make someone's pregnancy/birth harder or upsetting?
I'm not trans, I'd get my preferred terms, people who are would get theirs.
Everybody happy.
Or at least youd think 🙄

It's not just a matter of dysphoric individuals, though.

There are people who believe that 'man' and 'woman' are merely identities, not sex categories, and that all human beings can be either (or neither or both or something else altogether).

So if an individual who has adopted the identity of 'man' or 'neither' possesses the necessary plumbing, that individual can gestate and birth a baby.

Thanks to widespread sophistry, it is no longer just women, the sex class, that bear babies

Indeed, persuade the world that men can have babies, and there won't be a problem with dysphoria.

And this is exactly why we shouldn't be advocating for women to be referred to as men in the bloody maternity wards.

For me, it's sbout what this ideology represents.

This attempt by a group of people with a political agenda to divorce womanhood from femaleness, i.e. being the childbearing sex, essentially so that men get to use women's spaces and compete in women's sports.

This stuff, calling us menstruators and people with cervixes and pregnant people, and maintaining this absurd pretence that some people who get pregnant are not women, is just a symptom of it. And I find it completely offensive.

In this instance it may manifest itself as female people demanding that we refer to them as male, but make no mistake, it's really all about the male people. If this movement were led by women wanting to be treated like men then society at large would have no truck with it. But because it's men wanting, not to be treated like women, because women are actually treated like shit, but to be granted access to everything we have that is supposed to be for women, society says, "Yes, that's reasonable, everyone be kind!" and bends over backwards to accommodate it.

I have to admit to feeling a certain amount of contempt for women choosing to have babies and then demanding that we refer to them as something other than women, because it comes across as attention seeking rather than genuine dysphoria, and because they are contributing to what I see as an assault on the rights and dignity of their own sex.

I also feel contempt for public sector organisations, in particular the NHS, for indulging it.

In the case of maternity care, the default assumption should be that everyone is happy to be referred to as what they are: a woman. If someone can cope with having a baby but can't cope with being referred to as a woman, it's on them to signal that to their healthcare professionals on an individual basis, rather than wanting the default assumption to be that we have no way of knowing whether these people giving birth are women or not.

Excellent post, @MargotBamborough 👏👏👏

Every part of this post is 👌

But this particularly stood out for me:

If this movement were led by women wanting to be treated like men then society at large would have no truck with it.

This with bells on.

Let’s face it, women have been pushing for equality for decades and we’ve only partially been successful, with still a long way to go.

But a subsection of men decide they want in on the small amount of protections grudgingly afforded to women and BAM! Within 5 years or so, there’s complete capitulation at all levels of society, right up to the POTUS.

It fucking stinks. And only goes to show the utter misogyny behind it all.

'If someone can cope with having a baby but can't cope with being referred to as a woman, it's on them to signal that to their healthcare professionals on an individual basis, rather than wanting the default assumption to be that we have no way of knowing whether these people giving birth are women or not'

YES. Thank you. It's TOTAL FUCKING NONSENSE to claim to be 'male' while your body is engaged in what is biologically the most female endeavour possible, and I'm sick to death of everyone being expected to capitulate to this handful of narcissists

Well said. I saw an advert for tampons with a trans woman as the face of the advert the other day, if this is all for the sake of inclusivity why not a trans man? Who will actually need menstruation products on account of them being female. This isn’t about inclusivity, more about men being granted access to womanhood, and the actual rights of women being taken away. Xx

I saw an advert for tampons with a trans woman as the face of the advert
🤯. Stop the world, I want to get off...

just a fyi but with the nhs atm you may be assuming too much if you think female means what you think it means.

The baby loss charity Tommy’s has started referring to “women and birthing people”. They really helped me so it’s made me sad this language has filtered on to them too. Only biological women can go through the physical side of pregnancy loss and changing the language like that makes it quite dismissive of women’s experiences.

The word "gender" used to mean "sex" I suspect the word gender was used more years ago as it was preferred just because sex has a different meaning. The two in my view mean the same - I don't believe that anyone can change of opt for to change what they were born as.

This is heartbreaking. Xx

They’re still either biologically male or female. And only biological female intersex people can potentially get pregnant.

So what if a man who identifies as a woman wants a pregnancy test? Would the NHS be able to refuse him on the very real basis that he cannot possibly be pregnant?

Also, when a woman who identifies as a man, has a positive pregnancy test and intends to continue to birth, can they also be supported to take male hormones to affirm their chosen gender, despite risks to the unborn child? And can they request a male midwife only?

Would the NHS be able to refuse him on the very real basis that he cannot possibly be pregnant?
yes

Also, when a woman who identifies as a man, has a positive pregnancy test and intends to continue to birth, can they also be supported to take male hormones to affirm their chosen gender, despite risks to the unborn child?
No, I don’t think a medical practitioner would take that risk.

And can they request a male midwife only?
yes

And can they request a male midwife only?
yes

good luck with that, there’s only about 100 in the country, none in the county I live in.

They can absolutely request one. Doesn’t mean they’ll get one.

My point exactly. 😀