I'm not a woman - which facilities should I use

[Whatiswrongwithmyknee]

Genuinely interested to hear what supporters of gender ideology would recommend here. I am biologically female but do not identify as a woman. I am officially trans though in reality I don't think I am the sort of person Stonewall meant to refer to in their definition of trans (I am gender critical - which for those who have been misled by some made-up definitions, to me means that sometimes sex, rather than gender, matters. It is not an anti-trans stance).

The question is - which facilities should I use? I should not be in the ladies if that is defined by identity but using the men's does not feel right either. How do gender ideologists suggest I negotiate this?

Public lavatories were designed to be separate by biological fact. Men can pee standing up, so plenty of urinals works. Women need loos with seats every time, we need sanitary bins, washing facilities etc. We also need a safe space as a refuge from attack or fear of attack, somewhere single sex to adjust a hijab or other clothing. The other reason I don't like fully enclosed "one toilet for all" arrangements like you see in cafes is the number of times I've read reports of hidden cameras being found in them.

Gender ideologies do not agree and I want to know which facilities they think I should use

@Whatiswrongwithmyknee, could I ask a serious question? When you say you're agender, what does that feel like?

Why don't you identify as a woman, especially if you have given birth, which is a quintessentially female thing to do?

You are not male, therefore fine to use the ladies in my book

Gender ideologies do not agree and I want to know which facilities they think I should use.

Well, gender ideologies can't give an opinion, can they??

Never mind what Stonewall say. You are female so use the women's loos. It's all about biological sex. How you identify is literally not important.

I do not ever want people to feel justified in assuming that I align myself with sexist stereotypes just because of the facilities I use.

you’re thinking too much about this! Nobody would think that! It’s just about your sex love.

I presume you think you are Non Binary.... wait until you hit 50 and start getting investigated regarding women's cancers, needing blood transfusions due the amount of blood you lose each month. You can't identify out of being a woman. GROW UP.

You are a biological female. You use the toilets according to your sex. Your gender identity shouldn't come into this.

Gender ideologistsn say they are womens toilets not females. And some tw describe themselves as biologically female. By their definition I am not a woman and may also not be female.

Sadly gender ideologists do

You have 2 children, so whether you like it or not plenty of people see you as female even if they never lay eyes on you.

Use the ladies toilets.

It doesn't matter if some random person on the street thinks you are female & you feel as if you are not.
Other random people on the street think you are female if they think about you at all as they pass you in the street, or outside the school if you collect your kids, even if you are not going into the ladies toilet at the time.

Any random person is free to think what they want, just as you may be 'misgendering' some other random person who thinks they are other than the sex biology made them.

Luckily for you, their opinions don't really have any effect on your life (do you really care if the woman at the till thinks she is dealing with a woman while she checks out your shopping? Unless you kick up a stink, she'll forget you when she serves the next customer) & you can continue your day no longer needing to use the toilet thinking whatever you want to think about your own self.

You are making problems where none exist.
The rest of the world doesn't place any importance on your own personal self image.
Most of the strangers you see in the street won't even recall you were there, because you don't matter to them.
You were just background to them in their own drama, just as they were background in yours.

Sorry, this is getting completely ridiculous. If you don’t feel comfortable in a men’s loo, or a women’s loo, and there is no other alternative such as an individual or disabled one, stay home.

If you don’t know which loos to use, could you hold it in till you get home?

Just take a port-a-loo or camping toilet everywhere you go?

I think most people using the loo are thinking about needing the loo and what they’re going to have for dinner. I don’t think they care how you identify as long as you don’t have an actual penis and are using the women’s loo. Surely you thought about this all before self identifying? I mean it’s been in the news A LOT.

I think proper (fully enclosed cubicles with sink) gender neutral toilets are the fairest and most convenient option for everyone.

That way no one risks harassment or making others uncomfortable. And as an extra bonus, I won’t have to choose between sending my sons into a public bathroom alone or upsetting other women when they get older, and my niece won’t have to see men using urinals whenever she is out with her dad.

You’ve overthinking this. You’re biologically female, you’ve had two kids, you are a woman. If you have issues with the word ‘woman’ then that’s between you and your therapist to work out why. There is no such thing as ‘gender identity’ it’s just stereotypes, clothes and brainfluff. Plenty of women (me!) wear trousers and zero make up. Some days I even mow the lawn and take out the bins 😱 none of this makes me less of a woman 🤣

For your own physical safety I suggest you stay out of the men’s loos.

I was going to say take a she wee

www.shewee.com/

But presumably OP would be too uncomfortable with that too.

So tired of this suggestion. Every year some people become seriously ill in public loos and survive because they are rescued by people who notice that someone in the stall has collapsed. Enclosed loos are simply less safe. Why should we all have less safe public loos because some people have psychological issues with clothes n make up?

TW describing themselves as biologically female are quite wrong. As both they and you know.

This is a very simple issue, it doesn't need to be over complicated. Your sex is female - you can't opt out of that or change it. You use the toilets for your sex. Or you wait until you get home. Given the state of some public toilets, I wouldn't blame anyone for that.

I agree with this.

Plus if you have the anatomy of a female- use the female toilets. You are in a cubicle.

How would you urinate in a urinal?

A few women are quite masculine these days- should they all use the mens in case someone things they’re male…..

Where have all these different terms come from? What’s the end goal - honestly? 50 different kinds of toilets for people identifying as this and that? Because I don’t think a third toilet will cover it will it? There will be others who say they can’t use it for some reason. At the end of the day you have people who sit to pee, people who stand to pee and those who use a bag. FGS.

I think it’s absolutely bloody ridiculous. I go to the loo to empty myself, in and out, wash hands. I’m not spending an enormous amount of time eyeing up other people and wondering what they are….. and whether they should be there etc.

If you have two X chromosomes then get yourself in the Ladies. .

This thread has really highlighted a reading comprehension issue among users of this site.

'If you have issues with the word ‘woman’ then that’s between you and your therapist to work out why. There is no such thing as ‘gender identity’ it’s just stereotypes, clothes and brainfluff'

Very well said

Yep I can see councils and businesses getting fully behind this at a time of economic crisis to solve a problem that wouldn't exist if people recognised sex as the most important factor in choosing a toilet, which seems to have worked perfectly well until some men wanted to invade women's spaces.