Why surrogacy should be banned

[DomesticatedZombie]

• article from Stefanie Bode.

'It’s always harmful. It harms our health, it exploits our bodies; it’s dependent on global inequalities and makes them worse; it violates our dignity, our physical integrity and many others of our human rights. It is a form of slavery (of women and children), and obviously it’s violence against women and children. It makes babies into commodities. It’s very cruel and inhumane to women and babies to separate a baby from its mother. '

www.filia.org.uk/latest-news/2022/2/8/why-surrogacy-should-be-banned

What would you say to someone who has adopted a baby?

What has adoption got to do with it?

What does adoption have to do with it?

And I've adopted a child
I'm also opposed to surrogacy

Adoption is not a necessary evil! That is an outrageous thing to say.

What happened to ‘my body, my choice’?

@Bundlesofchocforme

Adoption is not a necessary evil! That is an outrageous thing to say.

It's not a necessary evil but it's a legitimate way of dealing with the situation where a baby or child can't be left with its birth parents.

Surrogacy is diliberately creating a child knowing it will be removed at birth.

I repeat: why are we talking about adoption?
The very first post on this thread was whataboutery.

@Jacaranda75

What happened to ‘my body, my choice’?

Because the baby can't consent.

'My body, my choice' is all well and good if you are in a society and a situation where things really and truly are a completely free choice. We aren't there.

And yes, the Mother can agree to be a surrogate on the basis of 'her body, her choice', but it massively downplays the rights of the baby.

‘My body, my choice’ is the call of the privileged.

It is so so damaging to remove babies from their mothers, not to mention the damage done to women’s physical and emotional health

@Jacaranda75

What happened to ‘my body, my choice’?

There are always practical limits to your body, your choice.

Should you be able to choose to sell your internal organs?

How and when does the baby make the choice? At what age does it become acceptable to sell another human being?

I'm opposed to surogacy because it puts the needs of the future parents above the needs of the baby to be with its own mother. I hadn't thought of it as slavery before but I can see the writer's point.

Regarding "my body my choice" I'd say that of course women can choose to get pregnant and have a baby. What they shouldn't then be able to do is to sell that baby to the "commissioning" couple/person. For some reason babies are excluded from the protection that older children and adults have from being bought and sold.

When it's rich white women being surrogates for poor Black women I'll believe it's a 'choice'.

Hmmm. A lot of nasty stuff happens in the surrogacy industry, particularly in low income countries, but I don’t agree it should always be banned. (I’d ban alcohol first, which creates far more misery than surrogacy, which also creates a lot of joy.)

There are lots of win-win scenarios that happen, particularly in America. The only person I know who did surrogacy paid £100000, of which £60000 went to the birth mother. She’d finished having her own children and wanted to help someone else be a mother who otherwise would not be able to have a child. Obviously giving birth to an additional child had an impact on her body, but she was very happy about how it all went, and she is now using the money to give her own children opportunities they otherwise wouldn’t have had. As for the child removed from its birth mother? That is sad yes, but the alternative for that particular child was otherwise to not exist at all. Given the choice between being removed at birth, or never existing at all, I think most people would choose being removed at birth.

@Jacaranda75

What happened to ‘my body, my choice’?

A 'free choice' that in many cases is not all that far from the 'free choice' of prostitution

It is a form of slavery (of women and children)
I’d never considered that tbh, but yes, if you’re buying human beings, I guess that’s the definition of slavery.

As for the child removed from its birth mother? That is sad yes, but the alternative for that particular child was otherwise to not exist at all. Given the choice between being removed at birth, or never existing at all, I think most people would choose being removed at birth.

That argument could be used to justify quite a lot. “Yes, my parents were abusive, but if they hadn’t had me, I wouldn’t exist at all, so...”

@Linguini

What would you say to someone who has adopted a baby?

Adoptive parents care for a child who is already in the world and who, for whatever reason, could not stay with their birth mother. Such a child already exists and needs loving parents. However, it's increasingly understood that even with the most loving and supportive adoptive parents, any adopted child still experiences a wound from being separated from their birth parents, which has long-term effects. Responsible adoptive parents know this and support their children through it.

Adopting an existing baby is completely different from commissioning a baby through surrogacy. Surrogacy is creating a baby so that it can be taken away from its mother at birth, just because someone else wants one. It's inherently selfish.

There are Ukrainian women, pregnant with British surrogate babies right now. Should we be evacuating those women when we evacuate British citizens to protect them from Russian invasion? What happens when they have given birth?

If you think about this question for more than a few seconds, it reveals the insidious nature of surrogacy. It makes women and babies into a commodity.

@Thewindwhispers

Hmmm. A lot of nasty stuff happens in the surrogacy industry, particularly in low income countries, but I don’t agree it should always be banned. (I’d ban alcohol first, which creates far more misery than surrogacy, which also creates a lot of joy.)

There are lots of win-win scenarios that happen, particularly in America. The only person I know who did surrogacy paid £100000, of which £60000 went to the birth mother. She’d finished having her own children and wanted to help someone else be a mother who otherwise would not be able to have a child. Obviously giving birth to an additional child had an impact on her body, but she was very happy about how it all went, and she is now using the money to give her own children opportunities they otherwise wouldn’t have had. As for the child removed from its birth mother? That is sad yes, but the alternative for that particular child was otherwise to not exist at all. Given the choice between being removed at birth, or never existing at all, I think most people would choose being removed at birth.

Agree.

@Thewindwhispers

Hmmm. A lot of nasty stuff happens in the surrogacy industry, particularly in low income countries, but I don’t agree it should always be banned. (I’d ban alcohol first, which creates far more misery than surrogacy, which also creates a lot of joy.)

There are lots of win-win scenarios that happen, particularly in America. The only person I know who did surrogacy paid £100000, of which £60000 went to the birth mother. She’d finished having her own children and wanted to help someone else be a mother who otherwise would not be able to have a child. Obviously giving birth to an additional child had an impact on her body, but she was very happy about how it all went, and she is now using the money to give her own children opportunities they otherwise wouldn’t have had. As for the child removed from its birth mother? That is sad yes, but the alternative for that particular child was otherwise to not exist at all. Given the choice between being removed at birth, or never existing at all, I think most people would choose being removed at birth.

What a weird thing to say about deliberately bringing a child into the world to be taken at birth from its mother. Even puppies aren't removes from their mother at birth.

There is so much scope for it to go wrong.

It's dangerous for the mother. Any woman could decide to be a surrogate and have life changing birth injuries, or find out that handing over a baby in the fourth trimester is unfathomably painful and emotionally scars her for life.

Or the baby is born with a disability and ends up unwanted.