Some thoughts on trans, the media and society

[Nefelibata33]

Hello everyone, I'm starting a new thread, cos I posted this message on a thread about Dr Helen Webberley, but people said they didn't want to discuss it, cos the thread was specifically about Dr Webberley. So I thought I would post my message for everyone to see, in a new thread. I think it's worth reading, I would like to discuss things with people. If you want to say something, please do. I will talk to anyone. Abuse me if you want, but I'd prefer if you didn't. I couldn't give a sh*t tbh. Sending love xxx. Here's my original message below

Hi everyone.

Just a post to say something. Firstly, if you are really concerned about big pharma, check that the NHS is in league with big pharma, and they dish out drugs like they're smarties. I have no idea what state you may be in, but you may have experience of this. I find it totally scary that so many people are getting hooked on drugs, cos a doctor prescribed it. This really isn't ok. As an example, a few years ago, they changed the blood sugar reading for which you can be described as diabetic. So more people could be diagnosed as diabetic, and more people could be given diabetic meds, and hey... a GP gets a bonus every time they diagnose someone as diabetic. I think the NHS is great, the nurses who are ready to sacrifice their own lives to help others, like Florence Nightingale. Like my Grandma. Like one of my cousins. But the ones who sit in offices and dish out drugs, they are a real problem.

Why am I saying this? Because doctors will dish out every drug going, even when they have horrendous side effects, make people actually feel worse than they were to begin with. Do we hear anything about this in the media? No. It doesn't sell papers. Any sort of backlash against big pharma? No. Because the media are onside with the mega rich pharmaceutical company directors getting richer and the poor getting poorer, not that the media would say that. Is there a type of drug doctors aren't allowed to dish out? Yes, oestrogen or testosterone.

This is the only thing no doctor can prescribe. There are plenty of countries around the world that take a different approach to trans people, and it's not so difficult to get hormones. With no disasters taking place. Keira Bell got a lot of attention. One person that made a mistake, amongst the thousands of trans kids who are happy as they are. One person. The media made a big deal of it.

Would it be wrong if I said that the media in this country have an axe to grind against any minority group? The Sun carried out a massive racist hate campaign against Raheem Sterling a few years ago. Britain's most prominent black footballer, it wasn't racist at all. You saw the racist abuse thing after England didn't win the Euros. It's absolutely shameful that so many people think it's OK to send someone death threats, JUST BECAUSE THEIR SKIN IS A DIFFERENT COLOUR. Encouraged by the Sun. The tabloids are the cancer of this country, our society would be much better without them I think, but we're stuck with them. They killed Princess Diana. A woman who was in the prime of her life, so happy, and bang... killed by the tabloids. There was a massive outpouring of emotion, but did it stop anyone from buying the tabloids? No. Nobody learns. I've read on this site, all this woke this woke that. Prince Harry has been accused of being woke. Cos he married a mixed race woman, and he doesn't want her to end up like his Mum. Think about it. Not "woke", a loving human being.

I don't get the woke thing. It's just a word that has been invented to describe someone who cares for social justice, and is right on. Can someone please explain to me why that's so bad? I really don't get it. Why are kind people a problem? Could it be, that there are just a lot of people who aren't very kind?

Back onto the media, they are totally corrupt, lying bullshtters. GB News is really struggling, so to boost ratings, they decided to attack the Trans community. To boost ratings! I guess that's more entertaining for the sort of people who watch it. I am now going to say something. I don't care who you are, but just realise this. Trans people are being treated just like gays were 20 or 30 years ago. The media do this to sell papers, and make money. Rupert Murdoch is Australian, he's an immigrant, but his papers bang on about immigration. Fcking hypocrite. The demonisation of Trans people is just part of a large scale war by the right wing/neo nazi movement. Are any of you reading this wondering now? It's part of a nazi thing. Caring for children is one thing, but demonising a group of people who just happened to be so unlucky that they were born in the wrong body is another. Have a heart, people. No transgender person wants to hurt you, or your children. They are not dangerous to anyone, the women's toilets, shelters, changing rooms in clothes shops... This is the truth. You don't get the truth in the papers. The papers don't have anyone's best interest at heart, they are just trying to make money.

I've said what I needed to say. I came on Mumsnet cos I'd heard of it, and I wanted to see how people think. I've received quite a bit of abuse off people, quite nasty, and some questions about my level of intelligence. Don't worry, I'm intelligent, and I won't stoop to the level of insulting someone else for being different, or having different opinions.

I am a feminist. There, I said it. I would die to protect a woman. So how come so many so called feminists are against Trans women? Do you actually believe a Trans woman is going to rape you in the toilets? NEWS! Trans women don't hurt or kill women, MEN DO. Trans women are not men. No Trans woman wants to hurt you. It's just the sort of fcked up shtbag men that want to hurt you.

If anyone wants to comment on anything I wrote, feel free. Make it intelligent, no gratuitous abuse please X

@SourAppleChew

Ok, last post about the patriarchy as I'm seriously derailing now.

Read the below collection of quotes which another poster collected from the SAHM thread and ask yourself how many of them could've been written by a man.

My sil is 44, rich and has NEVER had a job, lucky her! She has no trouble filling her day and has a great life.

Dp earns the money then gives it to me. Why would I feel oppressed?

I haven't worked in 8 years and bloody love it! I got to go shopping without ds today and have a long lunch with a friend. Going to the gym now.

My friend is married to the son of a billionaire and sometimes I have to block her on social media because her life is one long holiday.

I dont work, I was able to be a sahm with my sons, both in 30s now. I lunch, dressmake, walk my dogs for miles, spend time with friends and family etc....
I also volunteer for a small homeless charity, something I am so passionate about, being literally close to home.
I feel totally fulfilled!

My DSis married a very high earner and has never worked a day in her life.

My DH works 80 hours a week for a signficant amount of money, which allows me to be a SAHM and indulge myself, allow me to do all of my volunteering and my hobbies.

I work just a few hours a week in a job I love doing, I don’t have to work for financial reasons. I’ve accidentally ended up with a really high earning DH. I enjoy having lots of time to myself, I have hobbies, an amazing spa membership and an extremely fortunate to have some really good friends whom I’m able to see nearly every week.

My SIL is lucky enough to not have to work due to DB’s income. She has nice things, goes out for lots of lunches.

I'm a SAHM who has teenage children and is fortunate to be married to a high earner so I haven't needed to work since having kids. We do have a lifestyle that most people would find impressive.

I choose not to work. DH works really long shifts and odd hours so can be out of the house either days or nights, with each week being different. When the kids are grown I'll go and get some post-sahm work. Maybe in a shop, factory, cafe or something similar.

The funniest post was Monday morning when she started by posting “it’s going to be a long week, hoping the nanny isn’t late” followed by “anyone know a place I can get nails done, not happy with the place I’ve been going as I think they overcharge and wanting a day to pamper myself a bit.”

I feel lucky that I don't need to work. I am not getting any benefits because dh earns enough.

I'm lucky in that I didn't have to carry on working.

I am lucky enough not to work and stay at home with my son, as DH is a high earner. I feel extremely grateful for this every day, and try very hard not to take it for granted.

But what's your point? It isn't some sort of secret that some women stay at home and enjoy it, what point are you trying to make?

If a couple both work and share finances, the one who has the highest paid job (often the one who carried on working) usually has the more stressful day, as pay is usually based on responsibility. The flipside obviously is that they have more personal security but you can't have your cake and eat it. If you work you don't get to see your kids growing up.
Bloody hell! I worked full time, did a very stressful, but enjoyable job and quite honestly wasn't paid a fortune. What more can I say?

"and ask yourself how many of them could've been written by a man."

If you want to fight for more men to be SAHPs really just go ahead.

Yes sour apple you may well have a point but this thread is not the place to explore it. Please start a new thread.

@SourAppleChew

Ok, last post about the patriarchy as I'm seriously derailing now.

Read the below collection of quotes which another poster collected from the SAHM thread and ask yourself how many of them could've been written by a man.

My sil is 44, rich and has NEVER had a job, lucky her! She has no trouble filling her day and has a great life.

Dp earns the money then gives it to me. Why would I feel oppressed?

I haven't worked in 8 years and bloody love it! I got to go shopping without ds today and have a long lunch with a friend. Going to the gym now.

My friend is married to the son of a billionaire and sometimes I have to block her on social media because her life is one long holiday.

I dont work, I was able to be a sahm with my sons, both in 30s now. I lunch, dressmake, walk my dogs for miles, spend time with friends and family etc....
I also volunteer for a small homeless charity, something I am so passionate about, being literally close to home.
I feel totally fulfilled!

My DSis married a very high earner and has never worked a day in her life.

My DH works 80 hours a week for a signficant amount of money, which allows me to be a SAHM and indulge myself, allow me to do all of my volunteering and my hobbies.

I work just a few hours a week in a job I love doing, I don’t have to work for financial reasons. I’ve accidentally ended up with a really high earning DH. I enjoy having lots of time to myself, I have hobbies, an amazing spa membership and an extremely fortunate to have some really good friends whom I’m able to see nearly every week.

My SIL is lucky enough to not have to work due to DB’s income. She has nice things, goes out for lots of lunches.

I'm a SAHM who has teenage children and is fortunate to be married to a high earner so I haven't needed to work since having kids. We do have a lifestyle that most people would find impressive.

I choose not to work. DH works really long shifts and odd hours so can be out of the house either days or nights, with each week being different. When the kids are grown I'll go and get some post-sahm work. Maybe in a shop, factory, cafe or something similar.

The funniest post was Monday morning when she started by posting “it’s going to be a long week, hoping the nanny isn’t late” followed by “anyone know a place I can get nails done, not happy with the place I’ve been going as I think they overcharge and wanting a day to pamper myself a bit.”

I feel lucky that I don't need to work. I am not getting any benefits because dh earns enough.

I'm lucky in that I didn't have to carry on working.

I am lucky enough not to work and stay at home with my son, as DH is a high earner. I feel extremely grateful for this every day, and try very hard not to take it for granted.

You resent women who are privileged enough to choose not to work. Got it. Personally I resent women who drive fiats. Can't stand the things. And men who have yachts. I'll never have one, never will be able to afford one, so definitely mean anyone else should have that privilege....

Not really sure how this helps. Yes, some people are luckier than others.

@Nefelibata33

Thank you SourAppleChew, finally someone agreed with something I said. You're a good person

How very telling.

'Good people' agree?

Good grief.

Moral value is measured by compliance apparently.

ODFOD Sour.

A bunch of women making stuff up in the equivalent of a dick swinging thread is evidence of nothing. Look at ONS stats for raw data.

I have worked since I was 13. That's 35 years now, I don't retire til past 65. I am single now but even with my DP I earned twice his wage.

I never had any choice but to work. I've done all types of jobs through university. I've paid my own way.

On the other hand my mum was what you would call a kept woman. She was trapped at home for her entire life bringing up his 8 children, whilst he was in the pub every night with his friends getting pissed.

My dad couldn't even find his own socks, make a cup of tea, or a sandwich. She was a slave to the day she died after 68 years of ownership.

She had a night job for a short while but he stopped it. She never had nice clothes, make up or anything for herself in those 68 years. He resented paying £800 for her hearing aide because she never worked. I told her not to get one, because who wants to listen to a misogynistic wanker shout at her all day.

You are like my dad. He resented women too.

@SourAppleChew I’m now a high earner. I used to be in a minimum wage job.

The minimum wage job that paid next to nothing was a million times more stressful than the very well paid job I now do.

Just FYI.

Well colour me shocked that the 2 men on the thread agree with each other about women having an easy life with allll the choices!!! 🙄

@Chickenyhead

ODFOD Sour.

A bunch of women making stuff up in the equivalent of a dick swinging thread is evidence of nothing. Look at ONS stats for raw data.

I have worked since I was 13. That's 35 years now, I don't retire til past 65. I am single now but even with my DP I earned twice his wage.

I never had any choice but to work. I've done all types of jobs through university. I've paid my own way.

On the other hand my mum was what you would call a kept woman. She was trapped at home for her entire life bringing up his 8 children, whilst he was in the pub every night with his friends getting pissed.

My dad couldn't even find his own socks, make a cup of tea, or a sandwich. She was a slave to the day she died after 68 years of ownership.

She had a night job for a short while but he stopped it. She never had nice clothes, make up or anything for herself in those 68 years. He resented paying £800 for her hearing aide because she never worked. I told her not to get one, because who wants to listen to a misogynistic wanker shout at her all day.

You are like my dad. He resented women too.

@Artichokeleaves

'Good people' agree?

Good grief.

Moral value is measured by compliance apparently.

Yep. "You're a good person because you agree with me. Not like all these other moaning bitches here who refuse to validate my feelings."

I think many transwomen have an idea in their head of what it is like to be a woman. When they transition they expect things to change. They expect to feel different and be welcomed lovingly into some secret world that they thought was previously denied to them.

Being a woman sucks in so many way. Why do you think everyone is kind and caring and sharing? Why do you think women are or should be different to men? The only thing that makes women women is their biology. We don't have some kind of 'essence'. We have blood, bones, muscles and tissues arranged in a specific female way that is only for females. That's it. That's what being a woman is OP!

@SourAppleChew

You resent women who are privileged enough to choose not to work. Got it.

No, I resent people saying that men 'have it easy'. It's usually middle class educated women who say this, and they're the ones most likely to be like the women in the quotes I posted above.

"Just met my friend for lunch. Off to the spa now." 😂😂😂

Smashing the patriarchy one glass of prosecco at a time.

You know you've got a point when posters start saying "ooh, you need to start another thread". I have no issue with women and my DP would agree with most of the points above. Most of her clients are these types of women.

So many ridiculous, one dimensional, sexist tropes in such a small space. Would you like some salt and vinegar for that chip on your shoulder?

@Theeyeballsinthesky

Well colour me shocked that the 2 men on the thread agree with each other about women having an easy life with allll the choices!!! 🙄

Nobody said that. My comments are in response to women bemoaning how much harder they have it.

A man of 20 will likely have 45 years of hard work ahead of him. A woman of 20 could well be part time in 7-8 years and never work a full week again in her life!

Yes you do have a point sour apple and that is why a new thread , where it can be explored properly is the way forward.

@SourAppleChew I will have to work til I’m 70 to make up for the fact that my ex left me without a penny and paying everything for his 3 children.

Ignoring the male look at meeee merailing on this thread I think you’re very right Wallace. TW seem to think being a woman is all pink fluffy loveliness & are upset and I think angry & resentful when they find that it really isn’t.

A man of 20 will likely have 45 years of hard work ahead of him. A woman of 20 could well be part time in 7-8 years and never work a full week again in her life!

The man could choose to be a stay at home dad.

I could argue how simplistic and stereotyped this is, the vulnerabilities for women who stop working to raise kids, the very small percentage of women who get to walk away from having to work (I bloody well wish I could) but I really can't be arsed. Believe what you like.

It has nothing to do with that women require single sex spaces and provisions.

@334bu

Yes you do have a point sour apple and that is why a new thread , where it can be explored properly is the way forward.

Exactly. This thread is about a TW wanting full and free access to female only spaces and services without any restrictions or safeguarding applied to them or any TW, their rants about the patriarchy, GB News and the NHS are just a sideshow.

Unless of course, as I have seen argued on these boards by male posters before now, you think the loss of single sex spaces is a rightful and deserved punishment for females from males for being overprivileged, and that's how you see the two things linked.

A man of 20 will likely have 45 years of hard work ahead of him. A woman of 20 could well be part time in 7-8 years and never work a full week again in her life!

Why can't she work full time and he go part time? What's stopping them?

I will not be agreeing with any type of biological male who tells me that their opinion about women is the most important opinion.

How would a man know how a woman feels raising 3 kids alone, working full time, whilst recovering from DV and sexual violence, whilst also juggling SS and getting non-molestation orders every year.

I will not listen to any type of man insisting that women have to agree with them to be good.

OP if you want us to agree with you, provide some evidence. Actual evidence. Not hate filled drivel about conspiracies and poor TW.

I think many transwomen have an idea in their head of what it is like to be a woman. When they transition they expect things to change. They expect to feel different and be welcomed lovingly into some secret world that they thought was previously denied to them.

Totally agree and this is why they are so desperate to ignore any evidence that there are transwomen who will abuse women. They also , despite all evidence to the contrary, have to pretend that the behaviour of their community is not the same as others of their sex, as otherwise they cannot be perceived as " women"