Non-binary as a pointless option

[Slimmingstar]

There’s an event I’m going to for a hobby activity primarily attended by men. It’s a ‘clothing optional’ event.

The booking has closed now, to everyone other than females and ‘non-binary people’.
I imagine, in the hope more women will attend.

This is completely pointless, as of course non-binary means nothing and cannot be challenged.

I’m booking myself on as well as my (male!) penis having partner. However, if asked, we will say he is non-binary (as is the dog) and nothing can be said for fear of bigotry. I find this ‘non-binary’ option even more ridiculous, as all genitalia will on display!

@OnASpoonEdge

I for one am shocked that nudist events find they struggle to fill up their spaces with women.

To be fair, it's a difficult task when no one knows what a woman is...

It really depends why they want more women/non binary people at the event. If there's a valid reason for it not to be male-heavy, it's not really fair to others to say your DP is non-binary when he's male.

Ah, you’re really trying to roll back from your initial wrong assumption, aren’t you, DadJoke?

But no hate crime has been or will be committed here. We’re all non-binary so it’s a total non-issue.

That's the point of what the OP is saying, Arbacadarba! If they wanted more females they should have specified females

@Arbadacarba

It really depends why they want more women/non binary people at the event. If there's a valid reason for it not to be male-heavy, it's not really fair to others to say your DP is non-binary when he's male.

How does one know if a person is male?

@CharlieParley he's not using a "different definition" of non-binary. He's lying. It's like pretending to be a Muslim using a different definition of Muslim to steal someone's place. It's reprehensible sophistry.

@alkanet

Perhaps they could rig themselves some non specific genitalia with the aid of a frilly scrunchie & some bulldog clips?

@WomaninBoots

That's the point of what the OP is saying, Arbacadarba! If they wanted more females they should have specified females

But do they want more females, or just no more males?

Male/female.

There is no other possibility

Eh? There's only two options.

By including "non-binary" they are open to getting males. Males canbe non-binary.

he's not using a "different definition" of non-binary. He's lying

How, exactly do you know? Because the op used the pronoun "he" which, presumably, no-one should do about NBs? (Except when Mermaids do it, obv)

For some reason I can't do quotes.

@Arbadacarba

It really depends why they want more women/non binary people at the event. If there's a valid reason for it not to be male-heavy, it's not really fair to others to say your DP is non-binary when he's male.

But they could all be "Nonbinary" and they could all be male. Male has nothing to do with gender ID.

People keep saying TRAs aren't denying biology but they just keep on denying biology. As has been said by someone far more eloquent than me already this week, "if you have a penis and testicles, you are a male".

@WomaninBoots

For some reason I can't do quotes.

I can do quotes but I can't quote Arbadacarba's last post for some reason.

Oh is it a quote within a quote thing?

@WomaninBoots

For some reason I can't do quotes.

You can't quote a post that already has a quote in it.

Without knowing what the event is, it's impossible to say whether either the sex or the gender of the participants is important.

@FloralBunting

My god. The anti-non binary suggestion that anyone could just claim to be non binary! As if anyone would go to the trouble of pretending to be non binary just to access things reserved for the non binary. DadJoke, you're totally scaremongering. Such a thing wouldn't happen. Check your cisprivilege.

Oh the irony.

(Welcome back).

I don’t understand why anyone would be upset by what the OPs partner has done.

This event is clearly targeted at people based on their gendered identity. As that is the case, I think that we need to be kind and validate these identities - I have heard from reliable sources that they can be fluid so the OPs partner may even be female that day. It is possible that they just are looking for that…”female take on” on the event. As long as the OPs partner can be reasonably sure that he on that particular they will feel non-binary or female (and obviously want to utilise the associated pronouns) I cannot see the problem at all.

An alternative would obviously be to divide people based on biological sex. In that case, OPs partner obviously needs to state that they are male and accept any ticket shortages.

This is so abundantly clear. Why are people upset about this?

[quote DadJoke]@CharlieParley he's not using a "different definition" of non-binary. He's lying. It's like pretending to be a Muslim using a different definition of Muslim to steal someone's place. It's reprehensible sophistry.[/quote]
How do you know? Define non binary. To my understanding it means not subscribing 100% to either female or male stereotypes. Therefore her husband, like the vast majority of the population, probably IS non binary.

I don’t identify as non binary, I’m a woman based on biology. But I fall into the definition of non binary based on the above, so why shouldn’t I take a non binary space?

I think all people who are advocating for genders here need to chill. This is ok. They are what they say they are. No debate!!

I am quite excited about this development. Sex = something you are born with and cannot change.
Gender= something fluid, everyone self ID and no debate.

Then we can have events for gender and safe spaces for sex. This is genius!!

I've looked up nonbinary again it case the definition changed, and got this:
'Anyone whose gender identity or experience can't be exclusively captured by using the terms “man” or “woman” can identify as nonbinary. Although nonbinary people can personally self-define this term with slight variation, it's most often used to describe experiences that: encompass both masculine and feminine traits'

That covers me, and presumably the OP's DSpouse, and quite possibly also the dog, though I guess that would have to be 'not exclusively captured by dog or bitch'.

If it doesn't mean what it says it means, what does it mean?

Won't there be a lot of misgendering potential for any trans or non-binary people (who have not had full surgery). I would think a nudist event would be the last place you would want to go as presenting as a different gender does usually involve costume (clothes, jewellery, make up) of some sort.

It would be interesting to see what happened if just XY individuals turned up.

@AssassinatedBeauty

Where would one pin a pronoun badge at a nudist event??



I'm assuming OP's partner is gender fluid. He probably feels they when the occasion calls for more she.

It's all very simply @DadJoke and @yeahbutnaw, do try to educate yourselves and keep up please.

BelleClapper wrote:

…who are either male or female.

Well, no. Not in terms of gender. Which is the point. Believe me, I know who and what I am. Better than you do, since you don't know me.

One of the weirder things about being nonbinary or trans is having people casually deny your existence.

But bless your little heart.

That's very condescending. I assume that was your intent, but why be hostile?