It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to . . .

[FindTheTruth]

Here are some clarifications trending on twitter! What's yours?

• It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to finish up the last of the toilet paper without replacing it

• It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to break into a museum and draw moustaches on all portraits

• It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to redecorate your house if she doesn't like your wallpaper

• It's important to emphasize that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to tempt your cat away from home with Dreamies and claim it was hers all along.

• It’s important to emphasize that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to come round and sing opera through your front door

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to overwater your African violets and put them in full sun.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to tear the last page out of the novel you’re reading.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to park in your favourite parking spot — with or without diagrams.

@DialSquare

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to take a copy of your keys to your Mexican holiday home then holiday there whenever she wants to without telling you.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to call herself Jesus and drive around in a cabbage van.

Ahem Quite agree.

It is very important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater authority in a Handforth Parish Council meeting.

JesusInTheCabbageVan

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to fold down the corners of a book you lent her.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to sneak a lid into your stash of Tupperware that is 0.5mm too small for any of your boxes.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to unfold all the jumpers in Benetton.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to eat the last Jaffa cake

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to put a buttery knife into the jar of jam.

It's important to empathise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to sunbathe in the Lion Enclosure at Yorkshire Wildlife Park.
Nor does it give her the right to chase the Wallabies at said park.
Nor the right to swim I the Sea Lion lake.

It is important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to move to Mornington Crescent from Totteridge and Whetstone after a Goodge Street opener, even when rule 8 is not in force.

@CriticalCondition

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to sneak a lid into your stash of Tupperware that is 0.5mm too small for any of your boxes.

I always wondered who did that. Clearly not Maya.

So, it seems we've probably covered most of the main points by now.

As @MForstater is clearly quite busy at the minute, I'm just going to try to make sure she gets a notification, lest she miss this important guidance and get carried away.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to bring you a cup of coffee while you have a sleeping toddler on your lap and then place it just out of reach.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to use 'cups' in recipes. It's such a damn vague measurement. Kilograms are kilograms, ounces are ounces, and cups are not valid.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to roller skate at speed down a crowded street spraying passers-by with cold decaf coffee as she goes.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to swig milk directly from the bottle.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to borrow my favourite cardigan, which is slightly too small for her and stretch it.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does not give Maya Forstater the right to sharpen Jolyon Maugham's head to a point and drive him into the ground as a tent peg.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to add points to Gryffindor at the very last minute, after all the housepoints have been tallied so that Slytherin are robbed of their victory unjustly.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to blackmail Rita Skeeter by threatening to reveal she's an Animagus.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to dock points from Gryffindor unless she is a member of the inquisitional squad.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to shout TEN POINTS TO HUFFLEPUFF loudly when debating on Twitter.

It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to mix all the playdough colours.

Or grind it into the carpet.

• It's important to emphasise that the ruling does NOT give Maya Forstater the right to put my best wool jumper on a hot wash, damn it.

You know, I don't believe that using the butter knife for the jam is all that bad if it's in your own kitchen.
It's important to emphasise that the ruling DOES give me the right to believe this.

@BlackAmericanoNoSugar

You know, I don't believe that using the butter knife for the jam is all that bad if it's in your own kitchen. It's important to emphasise that the ruling DOES give me the right to believe this.

I know do people use two knives to make toast? I don't think this ruling gives anyone the right to make unnecessary washing up!

I know do people use two knives to make toast?

Nope one, knife one (jam) spoon. Spoon on Jam /marmalade /marmite /peanut butter /lemon curd or whatever your preferred spread is and use the butter knife to redistribute it evenly on the toast.