Does Bunbury have an orchestra?

[SelfPortraitWithEels]

(Also, can just anyone start a Bunbury thread or do you have to be a Weighty Feminist? Apologies if so, I will retreat tugging my forelock.)

Someone mentioned the cornet. Can I bagsy the kettle drum?

How about a Bunbury Vegetable Orchestra. Or maybe we can do something similar with lemon drizzle cake?

I ❤️ you lot. Let's join Braclay's Bonk and buy our own tootler

I have a swanee whistle. A bit limited in the classics, but I reckon I could get it in there somehow.

I would like to play the squeaky chicken please.

@TheWeeDonkey

Well I was banned from playing the violin but I could identify as a violinist.

As a wise man once said "I can play all the right notes, just not in the right order" 😉

I thought that was Eric Morecambe, actually.

The only instrument I have now is a pair of those tiny cymbals on a bit of string that you TING! to announce the end of a meditation. Am I in? I fear the massed trangularists will shun me & cast me out.

I've always fancies having a go on one of those mahoosive organs that 4 people have to pump air into and have rows and rows of stops

da da la, dadada lala, dada la di dada la....

maybe the gulag will be in a converted church?

@MelissaVonStressel

Will there be dancing? Because I can only do tambourine like Bez I was not popular at Monkey Music, and not just because I didn't know the difference between photos of violins, violas, cellos and double basses which had been resized so they were all the same size.

That was a mean trick!

@zzizzer

Ah good thinking.

I'll play the triangle.

Bliddy hell, that’s literally all I can play. Can’t we have a triangle section? If that’s a no, I can offer some things not already mentioned, (I’m literally the only member of the family who isn’t a musician, and we’ve got a lot of weird stuff here) though they’re not exactly traditional ‘orchestra’ instruments:

The Lap Steel
The Pedal Steel
The Sarangi
The Didgeridoo

I’d obviously have to have some notice in order to learn these instruments, not to mention learn how to read music, but I’m a kind of Can Do type of person, know what I mean?

@zzizzer

Watch it lumum, there's only room for one triangle here and I'm already dinging it with fierce determination

Backs away nervously with ingratiating smile #trianglewars

Oh hang on, I forgot, Hammond Organ? I can probably bang out a choon on that.

@zzizzer

Okay, we can have more triangles. I've got some more in the back, I'll go have a look.

Relieved sigh

I have a zither! I can't play it for toffee nuts but I'm happy to give it a good plucking

Trouble in the Triangle section.

We need a conductor.

I actually play the triangle in a reggae band.

I stand at the back and ting.

(I'll get my coat...)

Are there guitars in Orchestras?

@Nodal

Are there guitars in Orchestras?

Spanish style guitar, perhaps, in the manner of Rodrigo's Concierto de Aranjuez?

Please can we have a veto on any kind of Organ, no matter how impressive? Sorry, Hammond.

I know we're a bit percussion heavy but former drummer here, willing to pick up the timpani if no-one else wants them? Today feels like a good day for hitting things.

@Igneococcus

Orchestras need an audience as well. I'm very good at being an audience member, never clap in intermissions, don't fidget, applaud enthusiastically when it is warranted, but I absolutely hate opera, otherwise I happily sit through even the most difficult new pieces of music.

YY, Audience member is a completely underrated occupation. In a similar way, I don’t think anyone, anyone, completely understands quite how much stamina you require, and quite how difficult it is, to be an enthusiastic Marathon spectator. Particularly the London Marathon. I have been known to need a day off after enthusiastically spectating there. There’s a certain place, near Limehouse, where you can catch the runners twice, looping back around! ‘Applauders Palm’ or ‘Clappers Slap’ as it’s known in the East End, is an actual, documented, affliction. Not to mention the eye squint issues caused by trying to find ‘your’ runner/s in the crowd of 40,000. I’ve only suffered the ignominy of being spotted first by the person I was there to support, twice. The shame. Sunstroke and hangovers may also have been involved more than once.

I identify as a professional conductor I therefore insist on being in charge of the whole orchestra. Anyone who asks if I can read music or can tell the difference between an oboe and a bassoon is not being kind.

@SelfPortraitWithEels

Please can we have a veto on any kind of Organ, no matter how impressive? Sorry, Hammond.

OMG, you Organphobe.

Oh, I'll stop kicking the drums then Tofu. Therapeutic as it was, we can perhaps all agree its time for that particular sound to stop.

(Although I think our triangle orchestra is doing just wonderfully. And on an unrelated note, I have earplugs if anyone needs them.)

So much exclusion
So much bigotry - sighs.
We need a triangle support group for all the excluded triangles