Superstraight

[Xanthangum]

Superstraight is trending on twitter. No I hadn't either.

Its a subcategory of straight that means that straight people can now be included in the lgbtqi+ categories. Or something. Hooray! Fight for my superstraight rights too Stonewall!. Or something

twitter.com/supa_str8/status/1368003836863000576?s=20

I don’t find any obese or elderly males attractive, I don’t find any transwoman attractive.

But what is it specifically about all trans women that stops you finding them attractive? Trans women who may be young and slim, who according to many are simply men in dresses? Is it the dress you find unattractive? Because that sounds like attraction being influenced by gender to me.

I suppose if a transman was sexually attracted to natal females exclusively, they'd meet the old-school definition of a lesbian. In fact their oppression would probably be based on their sexuality (old definition) rather than their trans status. (Oppression is unfortunately experienced as a result of others' perceptions, which the oppressed cannot identify out of unfortunately).

So they'd have to decide what is their true identity. Their trans status, which would ergo mean they'd self define as straight, or their sexual attraction, and then work out where they belonged. It would be cognitively dissonant to hold both identities of course.

What is it specifically about obese elderly males that stops many women finding them attractive? Sounds like culture to me too.

I don't think that's how sexual attraction works though. It's quite possible to completely oppose someone's politics but still reluctantly find them attractive, even if you might not ever consider doing anything about it.

Nope disagree. I wouldn't find someone attractive if they held views which were abhorrent to me. I think most (natal for clarity) women feel the same.

I'm really uncomfortable about a poster coming on here seemingly intent on detailing the thread to police women's sexuality.

Does anyone else feel this is not quite in the spirit or is it just me?

@jj1968

So as a Superstraight woman, I wouldn’t exclude Paris or Monroe from my dating pool on the basis of their sex, they would pass that first hurdle if you will. Then comes the next wave of filtering... Which would remove them from my dating pool on the basis of physical attraction.

But surely if you consider them men, then a super straight woman would at least find some trans women attractive? What is it about Paris and Monroe that stops you finding them attractive? It's not gender surely because that doesn't play a role in sexual attraction as everyone seems to agree.

I'm probably in a minority here but I wouldn't, for the purposes of a relationship, consider them as men. I don't look at either of them and think "men".

They are trans women (or transwomen if that suits some posters)

They look like (or are trying to look like, if that suits some posters) women so they fail at that hurdle for me. I'm not interested in a sexual partner who is, or looks like, a woman.

Lees, I think is objectively a good looking human being but the fact Lees may (or may not, I don't know) still have male genitals does not overcome the fact she has breasts. Same with Blaire White who is happy to admit she hasn't had genital surgery- Blaire, for me, is a very pretty woman.

@Ereshkigalangcleg

What is it specifically about obese elderly males that stops many women finding them attractive? Sounds like culture to me too.

What is it specifically about obese elderly females that stops many men finding them attractive?

I think the poster is being ridiculous and have no truck with their posts but I can definitely see why other women would be uncomfortable with it.

sex-matters.org/

It didn't post properly. Perhaps this will work.

It's a new website about ensuring sex matters in social and personal circumstances, and in law.

Sexuality is not the baseline. Default and most commonreaction is to NOT be attracted to most people. Then one has to have features and or traits that positively attract a person.

@HermitsLife

I'm really uncomfortable about a poster coming on here seemingly intent on detailing the thread to police women's sexuality.

Does anyone else feel this is not quite in the spirit or is it just me?

It is not derailing to discuss what the concept of superstraight means on a thread about the concept of superstraight.

Disagreement is not derailing, this is a discussion board, not a gender critical propaganda site.

Sorry, sexual attraction is not the default. Am trying to make custard, here. Not a metaphor.

What is it specifically about obese elderly females that stops many men finding them attractive?

The same? What is your point? It's amusing that you felt the need to stress that men also don't find some women attractive.

It's an interesting discussion point that defining sexual attraction requires an acknowledgement of biological sex- homo, hetero or bisexuality are defined by the biological sex you are attracted to. So if you do not believe in biological sex, you can't define your sexuality- sex requiring, as the Rev Richard Coles would say 'genital acts'.

So it's not really 'excluding ' anyone to say you're not attracted. Attraction is absent for the largest part. Attraction is the exception, not the rule

But what is it specifically about all trans women that stops you finding them attractive?

As a teen in the 80s I definitely fancied blokes who wore makeup and all sorts of clothes, including ones from the 'women's section'. They didn't call themselves women, though. I think I might have felt a bit confused and intimidated, if they had and been in the dating pool at the time. Anyway, I'm no longer in the dating scene as I'm married now and monogamous so not expecting to find out anytime soon.

@jj1968

I don’t find any obese or elderly males attractive, I don’t find any transwoman attractive.

But what is it specifically about all trans women that stops you finding them attractive? Trans women who may be young and slim, who according to many are simply men in dresses? Is it the dress you find unattractive? Because that sounds like attraction being influenced by gender to me.

I don’t like boobs on men, either gyno related or silicone. I don’t like a man to have shaven legs I don’t like men with overly groomed eyebrows I don’t like men caked in makeup I don’t like men to have regressive views about what women are I don’t like men involved in any sorts of ideology/religion I don’t like to be worried about my man creating self-inflicted health issues for himself I don’t like men who think I shouldn’t have sex-based rights/spaces I don’t like men having long nails

The list is endless.

Now if for instance a transwoman wasn’t taking artificial hormones, wasn’t caking themselves in make-up, shaving or having risky surgeries, wasn’t offensively mimicking what he sees as feminine mannerisms and dress, wasn’t intruding on sex segregated spaces and kept themselves to male facilities.... then maybe I would consider him, but he likely wouldn’t be a transwoman then, would he?

It's not a derail, its trying to get a handle on what super straight means on a thread about the concept of super straight.

I really don't know why you pretending to find this difficult.

Being attracted to members of the same or opposite sex does not mean being attracted to ALL members of the same or opposite sex.

It's not just you HermitsLife. This is not the first time an FWR thread has been derailed into dodgy territory.

jj, this is a feminist discussion board. Not sure anyone could be surprised by the cool reception you get here.

How's about nipping off to this 4chan for a bit to tell them they're aligned with Mumsnet?

Obese middle aged women don’t feel entitled to sex with young, hunky men.

They don’t tend to pester them for sex if they state that they not are interested.

They definitely don’t start a long discussion about why the patriarchal porn industry has muddled their preferences and that it is the right thing to do to have sex with middle aged obese women.

And finally, middle aged obese women don’t tell young hunky men that they are hateful bigots if they don’t want to have sex with them.

@Ereshkigalangcleg

What is it specifically about obese elderly females that stops many men finding them attractive?

The same? What is your point? It's amusing that you felt the need to stress that men also don't find some women attractive.

Well the truth is it's difficult to untangle where patriarchal pressures apply and where sexuality may be based on some inherent drives connected to reproduction or similar. But what we do know is that at different times and in different cultures what is considered sexually attractive can differ greatly, as can attitudes towards same sex attraction, which suggests a large part of our sexuality is socially formed rather than inherent.

@ArabellaScott

Sexuality is not the baseline. Default and most commonreaction is to NOT be attracted to most people. Then one has to have features and or traits that positively attract a person.

Another derail but that's true and fascinating. I'm not convinced by the sexuality is a spectrum idea and that we're all secretly a little bit bi.The starting point for most people is to exclude 100% of the same or opposite sex (according to preference) and then exclude 99.9999% of what's left.

Someone said this on another thread (apologies if it was you and I've pinched it)

Is this nature's way of actually increasing one's chances of finding a partner? I.e there might not be many in one's particular acceptable pool but the vast majority of the population won't be looking in your pool?

Okay jj fair enough.

I'll explain to you, its really quite simple.

Heterosexual = opposite sex attracted
Homosexual = same sex attracted
Bisexual = attracted to both sexes

All above are valid

Sexual attraction is a personal thing and nobody owes an explanation to anyone why they're attracted to one person but not to another person.

Many people are turned off by another person's belief system, presentation or attitude that's just down to personal taste. It's really not that deep.

@HermitsLife

I'm really uncomfortable about a poster coming on here seemingly intent on detailing the thread to police women's sexuality.

Does anyone else feel this is not quite in the spirit or is it just me?

I agree.

I also don’t see why the posters on this thread are being expected to know what a hypothetical individual woman may or may not find attractive.

One might conclude it’s yet another derail.