Would you ok your son wearing a dress?

[KristinaJup]

Candace Owens recently tweeted (in response to Harry Styles wearing a dress on a magazine cover) "Bring Back Manly Men".. amongst other things.

Who really cares if a guy wears tutus and glittery dresses? Prince was hot af in his heels and Makeup.

Imo I would have no problem with it at all if my son wanted to put on a skirt but the tweet gained a lot of traction and I saw quite a few memes and lots of fingers pointed at feminism for "ruining men"

If we carry on this way the next thing will be....women should not be wearing trousers! What do you think?

Well hes part hobbit (on my side) so he'd need a good shave first! But hes got the legs for it so why not.

@Awarethebear

No I'm not embarrassed to see my daughter in trousers because that's normal attire however dresses for men are not normal. Why kid yourself? It's silly you must know that deep down.

So before it became normal for women to wear trousers (which is in living memory in the UK) would you also be embarrassed by a woman wearing trousers?

I’m wearing a shalwar kameez, its a dress, I regularly wear them, men have been wearing them since the 13th century. I’m wearing a sweat material one right now, I’ll spare you a photo of the hairy pins. How is something thats been around since the 13th century not normal?

That's not a dress though. Same as bringing up kilts when discussing skirts. Nobody is interested in the sewing steps or similarity of garment we all know that socially wearing a kilt is different than a skirt, that what the clergy and church wear or arab men gowns are different to socially what we consider is a womens or girls dress. We all know the type and im not sure what the point is with dragging that comparison
.... the point remains that socially it just isnt the same. And it is socially that is the issue not that men cant physically wear garments which dont encase each leg separately. We already know they physically can.

@VerlynWebbe

I was a teenager in the 80s, young adult in the 90s. It’s nothing new. Truly mystified by all this fuss. Clothes are for expressing belonging or not belonging or arsiness or whatever a person wants.

This gets trotted out all the time. I lived through the 80s and 90s - Kurt Cobain occasionally wearing a dress and the Manic Street Preacher's bassist whose name I can't remember do not constitute it being normal for men in Western society to routinely wear a dress. Why do posters persist with this myth?

We come from a culture where a “dress” is the norm (ie dishdasha) so ds has worn one in the evening/weekend for most of his teens. I’m not sure why that would be “ok” but a European dress wouldn’t?

@Paprikaka

That's not a dress though. Same as bringing up kilts when discussing skirts. Nobody is interested in the sewing steps or similarity of garment we all know that socially wearing a kilt is different than a skirt, that what the clergy and church wear or arab men gowns are different to socially what we consider is a womens or girls dress. We all know the type and im not sure what the point is with dragging that comparison .... the point remains that socially it just isnt the same. And it is socially that is the issue not that men cant physically wear garments which dont encase each leg separately. We already know they physically can.

How is it not a dress?

No I wouldn't like it. For dressing up play fine. Otherwise no.

A male Muslim wearing a shalwar kameez is certainly different to a male wearing a dress, just as a Catholic priest wearing a robe is different to wearing a dress because they are worn for religious practices.

It was socially acceptable among the younger members of society in the 80s

My mum would always trot out the line is it a boy or a girl. I would always roll my eyes
But boys needed to get jobs and mortgages. Why should things like that be dependent on people showing how well they comply to arbitrary social norms?

Why is it ok to have a social norm on dress but not occupation?

Ds doesn’t wear it for religious reasons. It’s not part of our religion AT ALL.

@Awarethebear

A male Muslim wearing a shalwar kameez is certainly different to a male wearing a dress, just as a Catholic priest wearing a robe is different to wearing a dress because they are worn for religious practices.

I’m not a muslim.

@2bazookas

Gawd, you must be young; some of us here have already lived through the time when women were often criticised for wearing trousers in public. I had open complaints from employer , other teachers, and even neighbours.

I'm 61- how old are you? I don't remember this being the case.

I think when people say "but it's not a dress " they mean " it's the type of dress that they understand is acceptable as menswear"

@DidoLamenting
You were never part of the alternative/goth culture then.

It isn't new and i've been on many nights out with straight/bi males who wore dresses for fun and pulled it off well with confidence!

I made a conscious decision that I would never get worked up by anything my DC did to their appearance that was reversible.

I was replying to simonjt and user127575 ( not those numbers but the picture they posted) NOT YOU 5zeds.

Muslim men wear shalwar kameez so I assumed you was.

@DontStopThinkingAboutTomorrow

My son can wear what he wants. Unfortunately, in this world we live in, I would try to dissuade him from leaving the house in a dress for his own safety; but not for any other reason. There are a lot of arseholes out there who would think it a sport to harass and attack a male wearing a skirt.

He would also of course, once he hits puberty, be subject to scrutiny from radical feminists wondering if he had impure and improper motives for wearing feminised clothing.

Yes, as a fashion statement, or a statement of pushing back against sex stereotypes. Happy to 'allow', even to purchase. Definitely to defend.

Not if it appeared to be related to a fetish (thinking older teens here). In that case I would grey rock the entire thing, not banning, but also being disengaged and non-reactive towards the dress wearing. Starve the provocation of emotionality.

I'm personally not attracted to manly.men and prefer androgynous men, so perhaps this is why I have a limited attachment to masculine norms of dress.

@AuntieStella

I made a conscious decision that I would never get worked up by anything my DC did to their appearance that was reversible.

Also this!

Ok @Awarethebear but Muslims don’t wear dresses/robes/dishdasha as part of their religion. I think it’s cultural not religious, just as boys wearing trousers is cultural here.

[quote equuscaballus]@DidoLamenting
You were never part of the alternative/goth culture then.

It isn't new and i've been on many nights out with straight/bi males who wore dresses for fun and pulled it off well with confidence![/quote]
No but how many were? It's just nonsense to pretend this is mainstream. And tbh plenty of male goths wore make-up- not so sure about dresses

I would let my sons where a dress.

People say on here that they would be ridiculed for doing so. It is only by standing up to small minded people with stupid ideas about what other people are allowed to do, that change will happen.

There are plenty of other men out there who wear dresses and skirts. Robert Sheehan for one. None of them are getting slated for it because they weren't in a boyband.

I love Harry styles for wearing his dresses and just getting in with it. I think he’s a great role model for little boys who are gender non-conforming. If he were ever to ‘come out’ as non-binary I’d be really disappointed.

@2bazookas my mum is n her 70s and was fired for wearing trousers to work in her youth. When I went to high school in the 90s, we weren't allowed to.wear trousers until the headmaster decreed it was cold enough. This shit is not new.