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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Burgeoning plague of incels - apparently

168 replies

EASUYA · 26/06/2020 10:27

This is quite the article from UnHerd; It seems to be putting the responsibility to prevent a future of terrorism on women settling.

unherd.com/2020/06/incels-could-become-the-new-vikings/

My synopsis of the article

  • Vikings were raiders, who were driven to such behavior due to a lack of women.
  • China and India may be facing a similar problem due to sex selective births leading to an excess of men.
  • The west is also facing a similar problem due to women unwilling to marry down in an ever equal society. This leaves a sub group of men who aren't getting any.
  • Incels make enthusiastic terrorists (ISIS recruits being promised wives / slaves).
  • Preventing this is a feminist issue
OP posts:
Afishcallledbob · 28/06/2020 07:33

Forgot to add the scariest thing about him was how he didn't see me as a person. If I told him I was unhappy he just ignored it and told me I liked doing all the housework, paying all the bills and being his sex slave. I can honestly say if someone asked him what made me happy or what I liked he wouldn't have a clue. He had an image of me that was nothing like reality. It was just what he believed women were.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 28/06/2020 07:37

Afishcallledbob Thanks

Afishcallledbob · 28/06/2020 07:55

@Ereshkigalangcleg Thank you I've never told anyone that before. My family still think he was a nice guy.

Wondersense · 28/06/2020 07:55

Whenever I read something like this I think 'Sure.....you first then'!

Those women, including the writer, are absolutely welcome to try and solve the problem by marrying those sinister, frustrated guys themselves.Smile
,

Wondersense · 28/06/2020 07:58

So sorry @Afishcallledbob. It sounds like me like he'll be signing up to buy a sex robot in future.

Wondersense · 28/06/2020 08:06

@Davodia

family life can be very stabilising for people My DH hires employees and he likes married people and parents. They’re much more stable, less likely to turn up with a hangover, less likely to create awkwardness by asking colleagues out, more likely to spend the evening putting children to bed and get up early the next day, more likely to have financial commitments so they are therefore more dedicated to their job.
Dedicted Hmm? Bingo! There we go! Of course he's going to like it. Employers will like anything that makes their employees desperate, dependant, afraid to switch jobs. It makes them more exploitable! It's all perception though. Some employers don't like it as their employees have something else to prioritise in their life except for work, work, work.
crosseyedMary · 28/06/2020 11:08

AfishcalledBob💐
he deliberately and calculatingly exploited you, I'm so glad you escaped I hope you've been able to rebuild yourself

Dervel · 28/06/2020 11:38

Ok shall we just not give incels boats? That should stop them becoming vikings! Maybe I have missed the point.

crosseyedMary · 28/06/2020 11:44

Why won't the good decent men step up and provide better role models for their antisocial brothers?
Where is the solidarity and camaraderie, why don't men want other men to be good upstanding citizens?

hypernormal · 28/06/2020 12:17

Hope this isn't going too off-topic, but I think in addition to the typical incels, there is a problem with sexism in millenials and zoomers. This is an old article, but it's relevant, about 'Hipster Sexism': www.thecut.com/2012/10/age-of-hipster-sexism.html
Like Hipster Racism, Hipster Sexism is a distancing gesture, a belief that simply by applying quotations, uncool, questionable, and even offensive material about women can be alchemically transformed.

The men I encountered, who I mentioned upthread, were nothing short of abusive, but at the same time treated it almost as an ironic 'joke' - a typical abuser's strategy. I think a generation of women that's grown up saturated with new media are afraid to challenge the prevalent narratives lest they seem out of touch. Young (heterosexual) women, no matter how much they believe in the rights of women, also have libidos and want sex with men and so are pushed to tolerate abusive behaviour and treat it as though it's just a joke as the price they have to pay for a sex life. I think incel rhetoric and porn has seeped into the mainstream through 'ironic' treatment of sexism, it's all linked together, as is the blurring of what is male and female by trans activists. I think young women are suppressing their own instincts to challenge shitty behaviour and sexism from men, because it's become the norm that men demand violent and degrading sex acts from them and that's just the way guys are, sex is meaningless anyway etc. I think it's a defence mechanism, in the same way sexual abuse victims often go into sex work, because they feel like they can then have some sort of control over their emotional response to what's happened to them by reframing sex as a meaningless act, a way of shrugging it off and pretending sexual abuse is really nothing. I feel depressed for this younger generation of women, the ones I speak to seem very jaded at such a young age when it comes to their sex/love lives.

Afishcallledbob · 28/06/2020 20:31

@crosseyedMary things are much better thank you. I've been happily single for 3 years now. Looking back I still feel like how the hell did that happen.

TehBewilderness · 29/06/2020 00:21

He wasn't someone I would be interested in but he was nice enough and we had been friends for years. He then turned really nasty really fast making me feel bad for leading him on and telling me that I owed him as he did so much for me.

The term for those so called nice guys is "favor shark". I am so sorry you were targeted by one at such a vulnerable time.

DancelikeEmmaGoldman · 29/06/2020 00:49

After WW1 there were many young women unable to marry because much of their generation of men died. They got jobs, wrote books, did all sorts of socially useful and possibly personally fulfilling things. I don’t recall any celibacy-driven massacres by unmarried women.

And this one is for ProdigalKittens.

TehBewilderness · 29/06/2020 01:11

I adorable the Viking Kittehs!

Flightofthecondor · 29/06/2020 01:15

Terrible article. And what’s she going to do when she finds out about different sexualities? At least she can blame SOME men for that.

TheProdigalKittensReturn · 29/06/2020 02:49

OK, that's just adorable.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 29/06/2020 14:16

Really interesting, hypernormal. I agree.

MsTSwift · 29/06/2020 18:58

Urgh why does every new generation invent its own particular brand of misogyny and sexism?

90s lad culture
Now this!

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