Be an ally to lesbians: stop using LGBTQ+

[Shedbuilder]

I'm a lesbian and I mentally parted company with Stonewall and began opposing it and a lot of other LGB organisations when they added the T and then the Q and then all the other identity letters to the original LGB.

LGB people are united by same-sex attraction. TQ and whatever are linked by their insistence on identity — defining themselves by feelings or whatever. LGB people are united by their experience of homophobia. Transgenderism, and its attack on sex, is inherently homophobic. The two cannot and could never exist comfortably together. As soon as Stonewall added the T to their constituency, it began working against its core community.

Stonewall and other organisations have done this by force. Uncoupling the LGB from the TQ+ is one of the most important things anyone with a GC stance can do.

Please, let us work towards making the letters LGBTQ+ a badge of ignorance and shame, not something that employers should be plastering everywhere as proof of how progressive they are.

Thisismytimetoshine did you say you were straight? Then you wouldn't possibly understand.

No, it is perfectly possible that I understand.

Your alphabet hides criminals too, Reynhard Sinaga for instance. Why pretend otherwise?

Everything comes back to safeguarding.

So there was once a gay, serial rapist which somehow means HCPs shouldn't wear rainbow lanyards because of safeguarding. What? Just what?!

92% YABU on the thread linked.

I think OPS point that inclusion of T will always be a cause of conflict is true. There is no consensus and can't be without a wholesale agreement by all humans that males are female and females are male. There's been a huge attempt to instill this idea over many decades now and it is not getting the traction it needs to become dominant and for conflict to die out. Mainly because males are simply not female and females are not male. 10 out of 10 for trying, I say, but expecting this conflict to resolve in favour of males being female is niaive and unrealistic.

Sadly many of us do see LGBTQ symbols as first and foremost representative of hostile and aggressive males organising against women, because that's precisely what they are doing with them We have eyes. We work with these men.

Please go and school them.... Not a chance of that is there?

Um, I was using rapists etc as a group of people who I would treat professionally no matter what I thought.
I was using homeless/drug addicts as groups of vulnerable people whose vulnerability affected their healthcare needs.
My point was anyone should be treated with respect when they access healthcare, and anyone should have the specific needs of their group met, through education, training and compassion. And it should be a given whatever coloured lanyard someone is wearing.
I will continue to question how to be an ally and also whether I should 'be an ally' at work. What I take from you sharing your relief at seeing a rainbow lanyard (thank you for sharing that) is that as a whole profession we need to do better at treating people who feel like you, so that relief should be the norm prompted by an interaction with a trustworthy person in a safe space, rather than a lanyard.
If it came across that I was comparing those who are LGBT to criminals then I apologise for my very unintentional and clumsy wording.

You weren't Barbie

I also think there is a big difference between something in a window and something in a consultation room. I think that important distinction has been lost. But I feel I am derailing the thread now.

I think JackiFazaki is the one who is confused. Very confused.

Being a rapist or abuser is a decision, yes a VERY bad decision but a decision.

Being LGBTQ is not a decision, it's a fundamental part of who a person is.

Both groups face prejudice. Sometimes society confuses the two groups as JackiFazaki has done and makes out that LGBTQ people are somehow linked with rapists and abusers. We are not.

She really hasn't.

Thanks BarbieandKenBruce for your very thoughtful posts and I know you weren't comparing LGBTQ people to rapists and murderers. I was a bit taken aback by JackiFazaki accusing me of 'using the language of MAPs, of paedophiles. Sinister euphemisms. And referring to 'my' alphabet hiding criminals

I wonder how many Linda Grant has on the payroll

You don't know my qualifications and what I do for a living, so whilst I appreciate your concerns I can tell you they are unfounded.

You're absolutely right, suggestions - I have no idea what you do for a living!

Which does also mean your assurances are worth bog all, of course.

Possibly when you talked about discussing the versatility of strap ons, & the pros & cons of genital surgery, with 16yos, you meant that you do/would like to do this in a professional capacity.

No one's safeguarding concern is 'unfounded'. That's sort of how it works. Nothing & no one are above suspicion.

Barbie, I was not referring to you at all, apologies if you thought I was criticising you.

Possibly I am confused Sappho.

For some reason, I keep having visions of Adrian Haddock on furlough playing with his keyboard and rainbow lanyard, whilst musing on his veal cutlets. I'd see a doctor but....

I'm sure it will pass.

NOBODY should be having visions of Haddock at a keyboard!

Good grief. Someone smash the safety glass and get the emergency smelling salts to Jacki.

Well glad we got that cleared up

For the avoidance of doubt, randomly telling lesbians they use the language of paedophiles is not a great way to be a lesbian ally.

I've never needed a nod of acknowledgment for my LGB status in a normal medical setting.

What I would need now is the understanding that trans people are NOT automatically LGB and actually many of them are homophobic themselves.

Such as my "trans" ex. He hates gay people they're "drama" he hates lesbians they're "terfs" and he used my bi sexuality as a way to belittle, shame control and outright bully me for years.

And yet... because hes trans its assumed he faces the same persecution he inflicts on other people.

opabiniawillreturn.tumblr.com/post/620547306024058880
Here's a link to a recent receipts thread on Tumblr, for those who are convinced there is no pressure on women to conform sexually.

For the avoidance of doubt, randomly telling lesbians they use the language of paedophiles is not a great way to be a lesbian ally

So what if a lesbian IS using the language of paedophiles

You can’t say anything?

Its ok for me to be told im using the language of paedos as I’m straight?

Is it just paedo language or is it anything Like transphobia for example

Cos there are lesbians on here who get told that they are transphobic a lot

So to be a good lesbian ally I shouldn’t say they are transphobic?

Best to avoid comparisons between LGBTQ people and rapists / paedophiles Rufus. We already get enough of the PIE comparisons as it is.

I mean, if I was using offensive language I might understand it a bit more. And bringing in the entirely irrelevant case of Reynhard Sinaga is a bit off.

There was no comparison made between LGBTQ and rapists. Paedophiles and rapists were used as extreme examples of how neutral medical professionals are in a medical situation, even with people they'd feel extreme distaste (or worse) for in other settings.
An example of their extreme impartiality.
A direct comparison was not made, and you bloody know it, Sapphos

Sorry to hear that milotic.

Thanks for the link flying.

Shocking to see it all in one place.

Best to avoid comparisons between LGBTQ people and rapists / paedophiles

Has anyone done this?

Didn’t get an answer to the transphobia comment...

So is that Tumblr thread all fake news Sappho? Or have you another explanation for it?