Body positive book for toddlers!

[WomanBornNotWorn]

Great idea - helping small children

mobile.twitter.com/Transgendertrd/status/1199056010520023040

Can you give examples then? I haven't read the book and can't see the text. I'm only going on what's been written on this thread - that boys and girls are shown being able to do the same things etc..so how do they address disability?

The illustrations have children who use a wheelchair taking part in the activities too. It also addresses sensory issues children might have.

The same but different too.

I love this book

Because it's the only one you've got. Is not the medication, surgeries etc a way of showing love to it, you want it too heal?

My body will never heal, it will only get worse. The medications cause other problems, cause side effects that necessitate more treatment, put me at risk of life threatening infection etc. The surgeries limit my mobility and activity even more but are necessary to try and control the illness so no, I don't see them as showing love to my body. Showing it love would be to just stop all treatment.

Again, I do think.its trite to have 1 token child in a wheelchair as the representative of disabilities. And is that child really playing together with whatever toys they want? Disability limits what you can do. It sets you apart from your friends. I certainly can't do whatever I want or play whatever sports I want.

I would change my body in a heart beat for a healthy one.so I do struggle with the message in this book.

JanesKettle

If there's a copy in the library I'll have a look. Why should I pay money for a book that I suspect I won't agree with?

OMG do you only buy books whose message you already know you agree with ?

I can't even. How do you ever buy fiction ? Pre-digested ? How do you ever understand where those you disagree with are coming from ? Do you not ever read and change your mind ?

Good luck waiting for a copy from the library - I'm sure all the 'this is literal terrorism!' nutcases are busy tweeting libraries with threats not to stock the work of transphobes as we speak.

This is a book for children, celebrating the fact that whatever body they are in, they are OK. How the f*ck does anyone disagree with that ?!

And seriously, Hooves, you are not the only person in the world with a body that is only going to get worse in terms of functioning, not better.

I'm in that same situation, and guess what ? It's still the only body I have, or can have, and I'm gonna love it till I (probably) get lung cancer, or suffocate to death, and even then, I'll love it till the moment it stops and I am no more. Because as crap as it is, it's got me everywhere till now. Every blessed thing in my life is because I am in this body, because I am this body. Without this body, I would have no life, no blessings. Every breath it takes (poorly) is a blessing, because it's my breath, it's me.

Imagine thinking it would be healthier for me to think 'oh, this old thing ? It's rubbish. I hate it. Someone should get me a new one, a better one. I can't be happy in this body. Take it away!'

OMG do you only buy books whose message you already know you agree with

No, I borrow books from the library..I'm not spending money on something that i.might.not.like or get anything from.

This is a book for children, celebrating the fact that whatever body they are in, they are OK. How the fck does anyone disagree with that ?!*

I disagree with that exact idea celebrating the fact that whatever body they are in, they are OK

Just how are you ok in a body that is in constant pain, that.limits your life choices?.Just how are you ok? If my dd re starts the medication that.im.on and she had as a child she won't be able to have children - how does that.make her body ok?

That's why I'm finding these ideas trite and patronising. It very much feels that it's being used to counter the trans issue and is co opting disability in some way.

JanesKettle

I'm truly sorry for the illness that you have. If you've achieved a sense of acceptance of your body them I'm pleased for you. I'm not you though. I'm not in that place. I'm angry and I'm pissed off with my body for.letting me down. I certainly don't love it and yes, your last paragraph exactly sums up how I feel.

Just how are you ok in a body that is in constant pain, that.limits your life choices?

Because there is no other body to be in; there is no other me. There is only this body.

I use modern medicine to help improve this body (my) functioning as best I can. Beyond that, there are two choices - despair at the body, or love for the body.

I am sorry if you are struggling with this question, which is existential, and difficult, for yourself or for a loved one (if that sounds snarky it's not meant to - I fully understand how painful these existential issues are, I utterly empathise with the struggle, it is painful and difficult and people without disability or life limiting or life changing illness sometimes cannot truly see what that struggle is, and how devastating it can be).

Fwiw, I do not see the message of the book as dismissive of my personal life -limiting, life-changing struggle with my body (my self).

I'm angry and I'm pissed off with my body for.letting me down

I felt like that too, for a long time. I still do, now and then.

I'm sorry; it's a terribly difficult place to be in mentally. It is so hard, on top of dealing with physical illness and pain.

This may not be the book for you, or your children, at the moment. But it a good book, with a hopeful and positive message, and I believe it is an essential counter to the prevailing narrative that sees the body and self as separate, and in an antagonistic relationship.

How will.it help children who feel like I do though?.what impact would it have on them if they.pick it up at school, if you say it's not the book for.me or.my children presumably you think it would have an adverse affect?

No, I don't think it would have an adverse affect on children suffering from life-limiting illnesses, or pain, or chronic illness, or physical difference.

Because, in the end, we only do have this one body. It's as stark as that. Whatever this body is, that's it. It's a fantasy, a mirage, that one can have the 'wrong' body. And I think it's actively harmful for children to internalise that idea.

When children are in crisis, we might be more attentive to the books or media we present them with - what is right for one child right now is not right for another child right now.

Maybe a child needs texts that affirm their anger right now, or acknowledges their despair. This is why children have parents and librarians and health educators and even bibliotherapists to help them in their book choices.

Maybe another child, dealing with the exact same thing, finds the message of the book healing.

There is nothing inherent in the book which is damaging to unwell or disabled children, imo.

I hear what you're saying but realistically in school just how much notice do teachers take about what book a child might pick up in the school library?

Will it be helpful.to a child angry at not.being able to.play football.with their friends say, or being able to go.to the party at the trampoline place? Will it make them feel better to be told to love their body and it's just fine as it is?

Will it make them feel better to be told to love their body

I think the message of the book is more nuanced than this, and maybe less didactic than you are imagining.

Eventually, all of us with disability or life changing or life limiting illnesses have to come to terms with what is.

Penis News has 'reviewed' it. They didn't like it.

Penis News has 'reviewed' it. They didn't like it.

How very homophobic of them.

Your disability might set you apart, but isn't the message of inclusion a good one for small children?
Would to rather a book that said no, don't play with or include as much as possible children with disabilities in your game? Would you support the message of the book then?
I personally want to teach my able-bodied children inclusion. It's such a lovely book, it's about loving your body. It's about your skin colour, your disability, both sexes/genders, it's about ending gender stereotypes. That all children are different and that's okay.
Ultimately you do have one body. You are at what you're born, whether it's because you're black, disabled, a boy or a girl. I think that fantasising about changing it can have a detrimental effect when you get to a certain point. You're imagining the book to be much firmer than it is.
@JanesKettle I'm not on Twitter, what an earth is the argument it's terrorism?  Has anyone reminded them of the definitions of both terrorism and literal? Also of love and inclusion, can they see how those are different?
@Melroses What is penis news? I darent google It sounds like something involving porn? Why are they reviewing a children's book?

Or possibly a very right ring men's magazine?

Your disability might set you apart, but isn't the message of inclusion a good one for small children?
Would to rather a book that said no, don't play with or include as much as possible children with disabilities in your game?

Your post here is talking about the message the book could give to able bodied children about children with disabilities. I'm talking about the message that it gives to children with disabilities.

I'm only going on what people here are saying about the book. Personally, I don't think it's good if it's saying to a child with a disability that they have to live their body, that it's perfect just the way it is, that they can do whatever they want and play with whatever toys they want because those things aren't necessarily true. Please don't tell me that my body is perfect as it is or that I should love it. If it was perfect I wouldn't be in constant pain. I wouldn't be facing multiple surgeries. I wouldn't have to take medication that makes me ill. Don't tell me that I can do whatever I want when. I've had to change jobs, when I have to work reduced hours and then have to come home and go to bed because working has made me so unwell, when I can't go on holiday or have a social life or do the exercise that I want to do or cook or clean the house.

The message that you are saying the book is giving is aimed at able bodied children and to me is ignoring the challenges that children with disabilities face because its real aim is to challenge views about trans issues but has thrown in skin colour and disability as a smoke screen. Obviously I haven't read the book so am only going on what has been posted here.

Again, I do think.its trite to have 1 token child in a wheelchair as the representative of disabilities. And is that child really playing together with whatever toys they want?

It's not "1 token child in a wheelchair".

I suspect you are seasoning, again.

This really isn't the book to get vexed about. It's a nice book for children with a positive message.

This really isn't the book to get vexed about. It's a nice book for children with a positive message.

What is the positive message?

zebras

I really think you should either read it, or not comment on it, as you haven’t read it and seem to have already decided you never will.

What is the positive message?

I think you've been told that about a dozen times already.

SonicVersusGynaephobia

Then I don't see how that can possibly be a positive message for all children - especially those with illness or disability. Of course many people with disabilities will be positive about their bodies but I know that I'm not the only person to feel the way that I do. To have a book tell me that I should be positive about my body and love it just the way that it is ignores my experience and my reality. I don't use this term lightly but it's gaslighting.

If you want to talk about gaslighting...

The book '10,000 Dresses' is sexist and homophobic. This is taught in schools despite being damaging.

There are also books that normalise the amputation of healthy breasts, talk about binding or 'being born in the wrong body'

What a refreshing change this book is.