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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Littlbrowndog MIA

349 replies

LangCleg · 21/10/2019 15:52

Has anyone heard from her?

The last I saw she had lost her login and had made a new account.

I miss her. I hope the confusion hasn't seen her suspended.

OP posts:
HandsOffMyRights · 01/11/2019 19:11

I am on that thread and can confirm that's all she said.
The OP asked Orchid to clarify what she meant.

I'm fuming if she's had a ban because the whole thread poses a number of questions, with the opening post referring to 'casual transphobia' and helping others to 'understand'.

BarbaraStrozzi · 01/11/2019 19:22

I read that thread. I presume (since it hasn't been pulled) that MNHQ are certain the OP isn't a troll, but given that the OP has said, early on in the thread, that if her child comes to regret the double mastectomy, that will be the child's responsibility, not the mother's, I almost wish the OP were a troll. I can't imagine saying anything that callous about the daft things my child does or (presumably during the teen years) may do in future.

HandsOffMyRights · 01/11/2019 19:31

It's upsetting to say the least, Barbara. I've had to leave it now.

3timeslucky · 01/11/2019 19:32

When my son was 16 I told him it was his own fault if he got detention if he didn't get up when his alarm went off in the morning. Learning to live the consequences of his own actions (or inaction). But the comment made by the poster beggar's belief. I noticed early on in the thread a reference to preferring to have a live son than a dead daughter (or words to that effect). Do people really say that? I don't know enough about how MNHQ identify trolls but it is an odd thread to say the least.

HandsOffMyRights · 01/11/2019 19:36

Yep the 'live son dead daughter' well, we know where that comes from don't we?

Melroses · 01/11/2019 19:37

17 is surprisingly young for breast surgery - I thought surgery was supposed to be over 18?

MIdgebabe · 01/11/2019 19:54

Help me walk away from that thread. I am finding it really distressing. I am feeling like it's a direct attack on me. That I have foolishly not accepted that I am really a man. That I am fooling myself that I am a woman. That if I had better parents I would have accepted the need to change my body.

The distress may be menopause hormones of course.

EmpressLesbianInChair · 01/11/2019 19:59

Midge Hide the thread & come have some CakeBrew, I'm going to. And you're not really a man, not if you were born with XX chromosomes & a vagina. All it takes to be a woman is to be born that way & grow up.

Melroses · 01/11/2019 19:59

Help me walk away from that thread I am not convinced it is in good faith.

HandsOffMyRights · 01/11/2019 20:04

Me either. The poster had only posted once in the last 24 hours prior to joining MN and their first thread is quite the statement.

GrinitchSpinach · 01/11/2019 20:31

So glad to see Fekko back today but Orchid, what??? I literally just saw her earlier and now she’s gone in a puff of smoke? Distressing.

Tyrotoxicity · 01/11/2019 20:46

That thread's leaving a bad taste in my mouth. I make no comment on the op's intentions but the inevitable results are screenshottable posts and upsetting parents who are trying to navigate children wanting to transition without subscribing to the ideology themselves. I dare say at least one of the two was unintended.

MIdgebabe · 01/11/2019 20:51

24 hrs & Their first thread? Ah. When will I learn to check first? Answer, when I learn to control my emotional response.

opened the wine. Tis Friday after all.

Melroses · 01/11/2019 21:04
Wine
HandsOffMyRights · 01/11/2019 23:23

Midgebabe I asked them about it after their statement re "casual transphobia" on MN. They say they've been browsing/watching MN for a while.

I'm still waiting for a reply as to where they've seen such behaviour and what it is that they think MN users don't understand.

Needmoresleep · 02/11/2019 08:44

Orchid will be missed. Her posts always seemed intelligent and thoughtful. I hope MN can reconsider.

FannyCann · 02/11/2019 09:20

I'm very sad OrchidInTheSun has gone. I hope she finds her way back. It's getting like Twitter (constantly deleting women) here these days. Where does everyone go to from here? I hate Facebook but I'm on Spinster and MeWe as well as Twitter. MeWe hasn't really taken off or maybe I'm in the wrong groups. I like that there's no advertising and it feels a very safe private place for a chat. I slightly worry that other more nefarious types may like it for the same reason.

BarbaraStrozzi · 02/11/2019 10:18

Given that the thread in question was suspended, and its OP is now back with a second thread in which they admit that they were not in fact the mother, but the child in question (therefore pretty much admitting the first thread was not started in good faith, which pretty much explains the "something wrong" tone so many of us picked up in their posts), I think MNHQ should think about rescinding any bans/suspensions issued on the strength of deletions on the first thread. Otherwise they are pretty much admitting that trolls/goaders/not-in-good-faith posters are allowed to wind up regulars to breaking point and then get away with this behaviour.

@MNHQ - please don't let the trolls win on this one.

HandsOffMyRights · 02/11/2019 10:20

I reported the original post so that I could also ask why Orchid was banned and if she could be reinstated - especially now we see the thread was not all (we suapected) it claimed to be.

Melroses · 02/11/2019 10:37

Worth a go.

The new TAT thread is now derailed and could do with taking down too, really. Especially as it is started by a 16yold. I don't know why they have left it up.

Tyrotoxicity · 02/11/2019 11:03

It was started by the child? Interesting. And makes people being deleted for expressing empathy make a lot more sense.

I reported it (really not happy about parents of transkids basically being collateral damage) and was told it was fine. Only got an email about one of my deleted posts on it too.

BernardBlacksWineIceLolly · 02/11/2019 13:37

I have just picked up a strike for likening trans children to vegan cats that I made yesterday. It's pretty much word for word something I have posted before on a number of occasions without getting stricken. leaving me somewhat Confused

I've asked MNHQ to clarify the reasoning. Is it the sentiment (that children cannot make a choice to be 'trans') or something else that has placed me 'beyond the pale'?

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 02/11/2019 16:55

Cough, cough hi guys! Back from my... ‘holiday’...

zebrasdontwearbras · 02/11/2019 17:07

I don't see how commenting on how very young children cannot consent to the sort of transition pathway they are currently being put on (puberty blockers/followed by sex hormones/surgery) is beyond the pale. It is absolutely the proverbial "vegan cat." The decision has been made by an adult, and it is arguable whether it is the best decision for the cat or the young child.

Welcome back fekko Wine