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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Paying for swimming lessons in a block/ periods

498 replies

Aquifolium · 07/05/2019 22:25

Hi,

My daughter’s have attended swimming lessons at the local pool for many years. Their attendance has always been spot on. Now they have started their periods they are missing one or 2 sessions a month.
I have contacted the manager to ask if there has been any thought out into this phenomenon, and the reply is of course, they can use tampons, which are perfectly safe.

I wasn’t addressing this issue in a ‘what are you going to do about it’ kind of way, but the dismissive response I have had from the manager has pissed me off.
I feel that my daughters are at a disadvantage now, and that I am paying out for lessons (block booking only)they can’t take up.
Has anyone else done anything about this issue before? Got anywhere?
TIA

OP posts:
Sickofphd · 08/05/2019 08:36

I'm really shocked by the 'just use tampons' responses here, on the feminist board of all places. I'm not saying I have a solution to the pre-booked lesson dilemma and it does suck OP. I get your point entirely. I'm a grown woman and I've never used tampons out of choice. I remember sitting out at a swim day at school and feeling so sad. I also remember a girl at swimming lessons with blood running down her legs and being teenage girls, the response was mainly to make fun of her.

Bottom line is, unfortunately women are expected to suck it up and just use tampons even if they don't want to. As many have demonstrated on this thread despite you saying your daughters don't want to...

Chewbecca · 08/05/2019 08:37

This is ridiculous. It isn't the swimming pool's issue to resolve.

cheercaptain · 08/05/2019 08:37

If a child, boy or girl, misses a class, swimming in this case; if the club or leisure centre offers anything to assist or make this more favourable in any form, then consider this a bonus; it is certainly not mandatory. You could explore if your provider will consider letting the child (boy or girl) take a missed class on another day if space is available and say up to a maximum limited number of 1 or 2 catch up lessons per block but the administration of this may not make it worth their while. Most terms and conditions are clear on what happens with missed classes. Check yours and fill a suggestion card or talk to the Manager to recommend something that works for all kids,not just girls on their periods.

woollyheart · 08/05/2019 08:37

For swimming lessons, I can see why pools like people to block book - it makes things easier for them.
But if you can already swim and it is more like a training session, I don't see why people couldn't book and pay per session.

I used to go to yoga with mandatory block bookings, and obviously I missed a proportion of sessions because I was away, and nobody else could benefit by taking my place. Now I go to yoga where I book and pay per session. People can come when they are able. The set of people at each session varies, but it isn't a problem. It is great for older people and people who have health problems- precisely the sort of people who might benefit most.

The block booking mindset probably arises from believing that you MUST have the maximum fees paid for every session. This is not necessary- you can organise things differently.

JessicaWakefieldSV · 08/05/2019 08:48

I think some people think they're on AIBU, this is the FWR board so I'd expect a rather more intelligent take with a good look at how women's biology is so often not taken into account.

Totally this ^

KatvonHostileExtremist · 08/05/2019 08:49

I used tampons from day 1 of my first period, so did DD2. DD1 just can't. She tried really hard when she was on during a water sports holiday..... arrghhh

I echo the other people who've suggested getting a mobibody swim suit. Expensive but a solution at least.

And it was fine to ask this question x

JessicaWakefieldSV · 08/05/2019 08:51

woollyheart

Yes exactly, you gave a great comparison. I didn’t sign up to block bookings for gym classes or yoga classes. I paid a monthly free or in the case of yoga, I bought 10 classes and just dropped in and got my pass clipped. It’s strange how swimming is some exception, or kids classes in general, where it’s just accepted they cannot operate without consecutive lessons being bought in blocks, when so many adult sports classes do it.

Genderfreelass · 08/05/2019 08:51

I think to a certain extent women and girls do need to find ways around things in order to continue doing the things we enjoy. Sounds like the aussie swimming pants idea is worth a try - I'd imagine they'd be pretty good as a lot of aussie spend a lot of time on the beach!

Fazackerley · 08/05/2019 08:54

Dd is 13 and wore tampons from the get go. She rides. Wearing a pad and riding is bloody uncomfortable but unlike swimming, you can't just miss it as horses need to be exercised.

She likes a tampon and a pair of period pants if she's competing as tight white jods are not the best thing to be wearing.

stillathing · 08/05/2019 08:54

Really shocked at the lack of support for op's daughters' boundaries. Whilst it is a tricky situation to know the answer to, nobody should be forced to put foreign objects inside their body against their will.

TinyTear · 08/05/2019 08:55

  1. some people just don't like tampons - i am in my mid 40s and only tried them a couple of times and hated them... might have to on holiday this year as i hates norethisterone even more...

  2. i would never use thinx or however it's spelled, did you see that website - menstruators my arse!

Genderfreelass · 08/05/2019 08:56

Maybe we need a women's design board/forum... not sure the right word, but where women could post problems and designers try to find solutions - preferably female designers. Maybe if there was an option for people to like and the more likes the more chance of getting finance to make the products.

TheHeathenOfSuburbia · 08/05/2019 08:58

decomposingcomposers re your comment about 8 weeks off your gym - my gym absolutely lets you freeze your membership if you're long term injured/ill/out of the country, certainly worth asking

Fazackerley · 08/05/2019 08:58

She prefers pads, but tampons are a good design that do what they are supposed to. Add a pair if period pads and I'm not sure if that's not the best design possible.

Or she could take the pill when shes older.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino · 08/05/2019 09:00

Oh my GOD!!! Take the pill when she's older !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jesus fuck, it's like feminism happens on another planet.

Fazackerley · 08/05/2019 09:01

If you are a committed sports woman the pill is hugely useful. You can control your own menstrual cycle. It's been amazing for my 19 year old dd who swims.

Fazackerley · 08/05/2019 09:04

Is the pill not feminist? It was back in the day!

Kaddm · 08/05/2019 09:04

If they just got in the water with nothing I doubt more than a teaspoon of blood would enter the swimming pool. I’d try that.

JessicaWakefieldSV · 08/05/2019 09:05

Or she could take the pill when shes older

Oh geez. It’s going from bad to worse this morning. The pill destroyed my endocrine system. It’s a ridiculous suggestion to tell young women to fuck with their hormones so they can swim.

JessicaWakefieldSV · 08/05/2019 09:06

Maybe we need a women's design board/forum... not sure the right word, but where women could post problems and designers try to find solutions - preferably female designers

Amazing suggestion. Have you heard about the female designers who have come up with an improved speculum? Not in use yet sadly. Looks way way better than the current one.

Fazackerley · 08/05/2019 09:08

Sorry to hear that Jessica but many women have taken the pill for years and had no issues with it. I took it from 15 until 30 then back on later in life. No issues.

JessicaWakefieldSV · 08/05/2019 09:08

If they just got in the water with nothing

Don’t do that. Young girls bleeding into a pool is not the answer. I leaked while swimming, using a tampon, it was dripping down my leg as I got out and was extremely embarrassing. Young girls would not do that.

IrmaFayLear · 08/05/2019 09:08

Obviously it's a bugger, but you have to think of the other side. Would you run a swimming lessons club (and usually they are privately run, even if they use a municipal/school pool) if people could PAYG? You would have to pay the instructors and could not be certain of the numbers turning up.

Also, casting my mind back to school, having a period was a marvellous excuse for not doing various activities. I remember the Games Mistress bellowing across the (smelly) changing rooms, "IRMA - you have had a period for three weeks out of four! SEE MATRON !!!"

I thoroughly support a "Women Hacks" page where we (er, other people) solve female-orientated problems/dilemmas. For example years ago there were no wings on pads and I kind of fashioned my own as, you know, periods don't always stay neatly in one place. I was very pleased to see Clare Rayner advertising pads with wings on the television and life was easier thereafter!

DecomposingComposers · 08/05/2019 09:09

TheHeathenOfSuburbia

We have asked and they aren't having it. Thank you for suggesting it. It's just another way that people with a disability are treated badly I guess. I'm getting used to it now.

Contraceptionismyfriend · 08/05/2019 09:10

The needs of the business comes first. An instructor needs to be paid regardless of how many attend. The pool needs to be booked out regardless of how many attend.

This is nothing to do with women or periods. This is about a sustainable business plan.