Paying for swimming lessons in a block/ periods

[Aquifolium]

Hi,

My daughter’s have attended swimming lessons at the local pool for many years. Their attendance has always been spot on. Now they have started their periods they are missing one or 2 sessions a month.
I have contacted the manager to ask if there has been any thought out into this phenomenon, and the reply is of course, they can use tampons, which are perfectly safe.

I wasn’t addressing this issue in a ‘what are you going to do about it’ kind of way, but the dismissive response I have had from the manager has pissed me off.
I feel that my daughters are at a disadvantage now, and that I am paying out for lessons (block booking only)they can’t take up.
Has anyone else done anything about this issue before? Got anywhere?
TIA

And actually it’s pretty well known that number of girls participating in all sport drops around the years they begin menstruating. So how about we have discussions on how we can address that without telling others to get a grip or stop whining.

Suggesting tampons is one thing. However saying that those who don't use them must be making a choice not to use them is another. The first is okay but the second isn't.

Lots of girls and women can't use tampons. Not won't use them but can't. For lots of girls and women it is certainly not a choice.

Rufus you may both be right. Your daughter may have a hymen that will not stretch to allow the tampon in or a microperforate or a septate hymen, which means she cannot get a tampon in (or even worse out once it has expanded) without pain, ie she does not have an opening large enough for it. I had a separate hymen and broke it prior to becoming sexually active when I was 16 or 17 and was determined to get that damn tampon in there. It was bloody sore and I honestly wouldn't recommend it. Especially because doing this when your body isn't ready can have an impact on your sexual health later. If it works, fab, you have one more option to manage your period. If it doesn't, you may simply need more time or you may need to allow your body to grow. And like for me, it may stop being an option after childbirth.

bloody autocorrect septate hymen NOT separate!

I haven't read the full thread so sorry if it's already been said....my 15yo does not want to wear tampons, her choice, she goes to her swimming lessons but stays poolside helping the instructor as do other girls, this could be an option.
A better solution would be for leisure centres to charge for blocks of say 8 weeks with flexibility to use them over 12, this would help everyone regardless of gender but it will not happen as it would not be cost effective for them

I reduce my own risk of it by using menstrual cups I sterilise every time I empty them.

Which have been found to be a very real risk for toxic shock. In America they are recommending having at least 2 and boiling after each use, not just emptying and replacing. There was a large contamination of staph areus after 8 hours apparently. They comments were that single use tampons may well be safer than menstrual cups.

CharlieParley what you describe is what happened to my older sister using tampons for the first time. She had to go to the doctor to have it removed and her hymen broken. It was pretty horrendous. Because it wasn’t explained properly to her sisters, we were terrified of periods and tampons. I used them but my younger sister said, ‘ I’m not getting my period’, obviously she did but was terrified still from using them. Poor thing ended up with endometriosis and the worst periods I’ve ever seen. Definitely no swimming, indeed despite her sisters being in the swim squad as competitive swimmers, she never learnt till her 40’s. I’m very keen on discussing all the obstacles for girls and offering solutions that work for every girl.

Which have been found to be a very real risk for toxic shock. In America they are recommending having at least 2 and boiling after each use, not just emptying and replacing.

Which is what I said I do! I sterilise after every empty, I have two. The risk of TSS is still lower than tampons and I’ve never ever seen anyone suggest tampons to be safer- other than tampon manufacturers!

There’s been 2 cases of TSS using menstrual cups, more here:

www.lunette.com/blogs/news/menstrual-cups-and-toxic-shock-syndrome

Instead of being performed using actual human vaginas they used sterile plastic bags derived from hydrocarbon. Doesn’t take a great scientist to realise the flaw there! Our vaginas are wonderfully more complex both physically and chemically than...er...a bag.

I can hear the "well then they would have to do it for everyone" whines already. Well they don't, they do it solely for women (adult human females grin

They would have to at least do it for everyone covered by the EA and it must be easier to suspend your membership than to allow you to chop and change within that membership. So I dare say you are suspending a month at a time. Would they allow you one week on, 2 weeks off, 2 weeks on, 1 week off? They wouldn't would they?

If this were a swimming club, as other posters have said, they are more flexible because you pay a yearly fee and then for each session you attend.

But if you book 8 lessons you need a lot of spare capacity to give the flexibility required. Who pays for that? All of the students? So prices go up across the board (maybe pricing out some kids) or do you expect the instructors to fund it?

Sometimes you do just have to accept that you are going to be hard done by. We can't all be compensated for everything. I've just been to a hospital appointment 30 miles away and mid journey there was a signal failure on the tube. We were all directed to another station a 10 minute walk away, with no step free access. At the moment, because of my disability I can't walk r manage stairs so I had to get a cab. Everyone else walked to the other station and got a train so was I discriminated against? Maybe i guess. Should I claim compensation? Or really, do I need to just deal with it and crack on?

I have to admit, my attitude has changed as this thread has progressed. Of course it's a feminist issue, as periods only affect females, not males. For me (and my 11yo) tampons are an easy solution so I hadn't appreciated that they're not an option for some, for a variety of reasons.

I'm not sure what the solution is, but it certainly deserves sensible consideration and debate.

The idea of paying for 6 lessons out of a possible 8 is interesting although I've never known the course to only be 6 weeks. Usually you pay in 6 week blocks but they just run consecutively so that you progress up through the stages. So in the eg given the boys and some girls would finish after 6 weeks whilst the other girls would be 2 weeks behind. How would they progress? Would they have to wait until the group behind caught up and then move up together or would their original group be held back by 2 weeks until they completed?

It's so complicated to do this. Easier I guess if there are multiple classes running each week so that if you can't do one you do another but I've never known that because they essentially book the whole pool out so the public don't use it at the same time. I doubt they would do that several times a week, thus increasing their outgoings but keeping the income the same.

I'm sure that the outcome would be for them to stop lessons altogether.

does your situation affect 50% of the population, Decomposing? No? Then hardly a reasonable comparison. And potentially you can get compensation from TFL.

JessicaWakefieldSV

And that article says that when you empty it you just rinse and replace, and then boil it at the end of your period.

The research that I heard recently says that method causes staph colonisation. The recommendation was to boil it every time you take it out to empty.

On that basis they said sterile tampons were safer.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino

Does this issue affect 50% of the population? No. Because lits of women and girls don't have this problem.

And no way are TFL going to pay for my taxi. That is just hilarious.

The research that I heard recently can you link it? As a user of cups I’d like to see it. I personally sterilise and use two, as safest method. Remember only 2 cases of TSS with cups. If we can make them safer by using two and sterilising, that’s a message that needs to be out there too. I think it’s funny when I mentioned TSS with tampons I was told it was so rare it barely worthy of mention...

DecomposingComposers as a one off you grinned and bore it. But if that hapenns everytime you travel, is it still acceptable?

To me, people denying that there is anything to think òver and try to improve are the equivalent of people who say that step free access is not required.

Just because something isn't perfect doesn't mean noone thinks about it and tries to improve it at all.

OP's daughter is sucking it up. That's the default position. Surely it doesn't have to be the only solution?

On that basis they said sterile tampons were safer. who said? They’re still not and it’s weird ‘they’ would say so given these sterile tampons have more cases of TSS.

JessicaWakefieldSV

They discuss it, in full, on "The Doctors" on youtube.

Sigh.

Periods affect pretty much all women and girls at some point. For swimming they will have to find some solution, many of which would be imposed on them rather than a choice, or miss out. Whichever, this is a situation that affects 50% of the population.

Can you let me know what percentage of boys are affected by this?

JessicaWakefieldSV
The risk was higher historically and the way that tampons are produced now makes them much safer. Watch the youtube clip. It gives all of the data on there.

ILuvBirdsEye

It's by no means a one off. It happens about 30% of the time I guess. Same as a fuck ton of other "inconveniences" that involve people with disabilities having to try and fit into a non disabled world.

My life would be so much easier if I gave up work and stayed home all day but I'm not prepared to do that. I'm also not prepared to use my disability as a reason why I can't do things. So I get on with it. Yes it's harder, more painful, more inconvenient but no one else is going to provide the solutions for me are they?

WeepingWillowWeepingWino
Exactly what % of women and girls are we talking about then?

How many sit out of swimming or are using tampons, under duress, in order to go swimming?

It certainly isn't all women.

And what would your answer be? Increase the cost of lessons to cover the flexibility? Stop lessons altogether so that everyone is equally disadvantaged?

What does the OP do if they are on holiday while her dds are on their periods? Are they not able to go swimming on holiday either? That is quite restrictive. Is that a feminist issue too? Because there isn't a financial work around is there in that instance?

charley

Thats very interesting

Im glad i just go with the 'dont worry baby' bit rather than saying 'yes of course you do!!'

Otherwise I'll never hear the last of it if she does actually have an issue!