How would you feel about having a male midwide

[Lardlizard]

Just interested in the points of view

No, I wouldn't be happy. I don't want any men to perform intimate examinations on me.

Having seen many hospital teams, it is surprising the disproportionately high number on here who've had male MW

Maybe those having had female and happy not drawn to answer, as many don't seem to have any on the team.

It's the male, i.e. opposite sex thing, for me.

Only a woman knows how it feels to have a vulva and sore tits, and not want her tits handling by a male, etc.

The world over women have supported women through labour, apart from where money and authority involved then its predominantly male privilege

How would you feel about a lesbian being your midwife?? They might look at you sexually, break boundaries too!!!

You really don’t understand this conversation do you?

No, I’ve always had female health professionals for anything like that, for personal reasons. Both men and women have a choice on who provides this type of intimate care and most of us should be able to understand why that is. Anyone questioning why women would prefer female midwifes hasn’t been paying attention.

This.

How would you feel about a lesbian being your midwife?? They might look at you sexually, break boundaries too!!! Why are you all assuming that as a male he is reveling in looking at the female body sexually!! Maybe he’s gay and couldn’t give two shiny shits about you sexually, or maybe hes not and just loves his job and sees you as a woman giving birth!! bloody hell! 🙄 why do some women think that ALL men are out to mollest them!!

As no one has actually said any of these things, this post is entirely irrelevant. And insensitive.

I just don’t see the issue at all!! When I was I labour my nurse had to try to move the cord, she couldn’t so she called the consultant, who was male and he did it!! I didn’t give a hoot who moved that cord as long as they did it! Male or female as long as they are trained!!

Youngandfree I think you are completely misunderstanding the feelings of most posters.

I said that I would be ok with a male midwife. But any doubts that I have would not be about being seen in a sexual way. It would be about empathy, about my midwife understanding how it feels to have a female body.

It's not for me and it needs no justification for me to feel that way.

I had a lovely, lovely student male health visitor alongside my health visitor. He was clearly nervous but I couldn't fault his manner and treatment of me. But did I feel able to mention certain concerns I had? No. So I didn't.

Why Would That Bother You I Don't Understand.
NAMALT.
Women Do It Too.
But Lesbians.

SSDD Bingo - I call house!

Weird post that free

Male very different from female!
If a female made a move on a patient that would be as wrong as a male doing it!

We're talking about a same sex experience as opposed to opposite though.

No.

I think women instinctively trust men less, are more on guard in presence of males, and that can potentially hinder a smooth birth.

I think this is not a logical thing but a deeply rooted biological one. When vulnerable, I need to be cared for/assisted by someone who presents the least threat and has most likelihood of empathising.

Same reason I chose a female driving instructor, probably.

A trainee male midwife helped deliver my DD. I was his first delivery, and coincidentally the name we picked for DD was his mum's name. He couldn't wait to go and ring his DM to tell her

I had a female midwife for my first birth and a male midwife for my second. Both were equally professional.

How would you feel about a lesbian being your midwife?

No problem whatsoever, Lesbians are women like me. Some have even given birth.

HTH

@Belboeuf yes actually a PP upthread said something along the lines of them needing chaperones and breaking boundaries!! You don’t need to be male to do that!!

@Bluestitch I’m not homophobic I asked the question rhetorically as it’s as stupid as the OPs question imo!! As long as they are qualified I don’t give a hoot who they are male or female!!! Ppl making it about males looking at females sexually stroked that question in me!! Just because he’s make doesn’t mean he’s less caring or sees you as in a sexual way!!

How would you feel about a lesbian being your midwife?? They might look at you sexually, break boundaries too!!!

Oh dear...

*striked

I had a male midwife with dd2. I don't remember being asked if I minded, but I may have been.
I didn't really have much contact with him as went he went off to fill the birth pool, I had dd in the bathtub.
He was quite funny though, which helped.

I would have no problem. My only criteria for any HCP looking after me is that they are good at their job.

Had a female midwife for one birth and she was awful. Took choices away from me, unsympathetic, rough. Thankfully had a medical student who asked if he could attend the labour and deliver the baby - he was fantastic and thank god he was there to counteract the midwife.

No thanks.

I had a male midwife called David and he was far nicer than the lady I started with. She went off shift and I got David because a lady refused him next door. Didn't mind when bit. I expect once you just see it as your job and nothing more really. In fact he and Dh were chatting away about stuff and it made everything far more relaxed
Its weird that if you need intervention most of the obs/gynae docs appear to be male but there is no objection?

''I want this'' and ''my biology dictates this'' are acceptable reasons for behaviour, up to and including men who kill women because they can't get laid.

It works right up to the point where women have a boundary that excludes men.

A male midwife delivered one of my children. He was amazing. By far the best of all my midwives. Dedicated, encouraging, well informed, calm, empowering. I think for a man to go into such a female dominated profession requires a real passion and commitment and therefore the men who take this unqualified route are often the best of the best. Our male midwife was highly sought after by local pregnant women.

@RepealTheGRA im not saying I would have a problem with it I’m merely saying that to those making it about sexuality that it’s not about that